el Page 2165 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
A Children's Treasury Of Mascots Eating People
Mascots are running wild at our sporting events, both home and abroad. Who will put a stop to the madness? And why won't the music coordinators at these arenas use Temple of the Dog in place of Weird Al?...
Sports Fella Doubles Down On The Stupid
Remember that foolish thing Bill Simmons said the other day about Tiger and Muhammad Ali? Well, Bill has taken a step back, read some old Sports Illustrateds, and decided to be foolish again, only at much greater length. [Charles Pierce]...
Clippers Fandom Now An Exercise In Spiritual Enlightenment
"For me, being a Los Angeles Clippers fan for over twenty years has taught me firsthand about the spiritual dimensions of faith and suffering, and has helped me better understand my own Hindu tradition." [Huffington Post]...
This Explains A Little More About AI's Absence
Tawanna Iverson filed for divorce, after 8 1/2 years of marriage. Unemployed father, sick child, broken home; it's like the Iversons are a microcosm for every recession-hit Rust Belt family. Besides the millions of dollars. [Philly Daily News]...
What Are We To Do With Brittney Griner?
Baylor's Brittney Griner assaulted someone on a basketball court last night and after dealing with LeGarrette Blount and Elizabeth Lambert, it's still not clear what the appropriate level of hysterical moral outrage should be....
They Would Vie For Mr. Irrelevant In Dave Chappelle's Racial Draft
Three L.A. teachers were suspended for giving kids photos of O.J. Simpson and Dennis Rodman to carry in a Black History Month parade. Among the alternatives suggested by the district: Kobe Bryant. I have made none of this up. [AP]...
Great Caption Fail, Or Greatest Caption Fail?
The Times again shows their conservative bias by mislabeling a photo that's definitely not Hillary Clinton. And probably not Michelle Bachelet, either....
Unborn Baby Yao Causes An International Incident
Conspiracy theorists in China believe that Yao Ming just brought his pregnant wife back to the US so she can give birth to an American citizen. Lou Dobbs is not going to be happy....
Rich Eisen's 40-Yard Dash An Amusing Special-Effects Bonanza
When he isn't impersonating Howard Cosell, Rich Eisen is straight running things on the NFL Network. Things like the 40-yard dash, which Rich ran in a slight-breeze-inducing 6.25 seconds....
Football Team Doesn't Like The News, So They Steal The Newspaper
Bad: Texas A&M-Commerce players busted with drugs. Worse: players take every copy on campus of the school newspaper running the story. Worserer: coach is proud of their "team-building exercise."...
Today In <em>SportsCenter</em> Fashion: Hannah's Demure, But What Is That On Josh Elliott's Neck?
In which we examine the occasionally controversial wardrobe choices on everyone's favorite morning serial. In this installment, Hannah Storm and Josh Elliott....
Sportswriter Gil LeBreton Compares Vancouver 2010 To Berlin 1936
The Vancouver Olympics were an impressive display of Canadian pride and ambition, culminating in the most dominating hometown performance in the history of the Winter Games. You know who else liked dominating the Olympics, don't you? HITLER!...
Clippers Add To Their Distinguished Record Of Racial Sensitivity
I have no idea what's going on in this press release, except that the Steven Esparza in question is a media services assistant with the team, and that the Clippers are an abomination of a franchise. [NBA.com, via @HoopsHype]...
Purdue Pete's Child-Terrorizing Days Are Numbered
Purdue is redesigning their mascot, after many complaints about scared children. Not this li'l tyke, though; Purdue Pete swallowed him whole before he could register fear....
Well, That AI/Philly Reunion Was Fun
The Sixers announced Allen Iverson won't return to the team, ostensibly to spend time with his ailing daughter. Then why was he in Charlotte over the weekend, partying it up with Jermaine Dupri? [Philly Daily News]...
Indiana Hazing Scandal Proves High School Kids Are Still Obnoxious
Carmel High School's basketball Senior Day was ruined—ruined!—by shameless tabloid reporters snooping around in the stands for salacious gossip. Oh, and the fact that three of the four seniors were kicked off the team for alleged forceable sodomy....
Last Night's Winner: Jay Leno
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Lindsey Vonn, who continued her streak of tape delayed wipeouts by appearing as a guest on the new, new Tonight Show with....ugh, Jay Leno....
Erin Andrews Becomes A Star Who Someone Will Dance With
"Dancing With The Stars" announced that its lineup for next season will include America's Sideline Princess, because apparently all you have to do is ask and they'll let you on. It's a pretty good system ABC's got going on there....
Say Hey, Wait A Minute
"Above all, the story of Willie Mays reminds us of a time when the only performance-enhancing drug was joy." So sayeth the great Pete Hamill, who is proof that baseball makes even brilliant writers sound like a Wonder Years voiceover....
Hannah Storm Boot Watch, Day 42
Current Threat Level: Black, stiletto heel, paired with tasteful earth tones. Don't ask me to explain Bruce Bowen's tie, though. [via ESPN]...