el Page 2303 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Get Ready For The Los Angeles Saints In 2009...Maybe?
An unidentified partner of the man trying to bring the NFL back to Los Angeles told a local paper earlier in the week that he had "no doubt" that the city would be home to a pro team in 2009. And we report that with all apologies to USC. Of course, no team has been identified by the league (or anyon...
Aye Carumba! Chad Johnson Changes Last Name To Ocho Cinco
So Bengals wideout Chad Johnson has legally changed his name to "Chad Javon Ocho Cinco." Which I guess is only slightly better than "Chad Javon GoldenPalace.com." Chad expects to play in the Bengals' season opener, despite suffering a dislocated shoulder in the preseason and creating more needlework...
GTGs Are Gangsta, In A J.C. Penny Back-To-School-Sale Kind Of Way
If Georgia Tech goes on to football greatness this year they can thank two things: the new triple option offense, and the GTGs; that campus hip hop duo of DBay and Swaff who are taking the ACC by storm. Kind of. Check out their phat beatz following the the jump. I can just see DBay, the fat one, doi...
Kid Who Fell Onto Field Further Traumatized By Dopey Matt Lauer Interview
It pays to be a klutz in Philadelphia: The kid who tumbled from the stands onto the warning track at Citizens Bank Ballpark on Thursday woke up the next day to new-found celebrity, collecting a bunch of Phillies memorabilia, game tickets and a trip to New York for an interview on the Today Show. The...
Yes We Can ... Get Out Quicker Through This Exit. Obama's Big Night At Invesco
Although Barack Obama's acceptance speech on Thursday was impressive in many ways, I can't help but feel that political conventions officially jumped the shark when the Democrats booked Invesco Field for the final day of their big party. It can only get larger and sloppier from here. What's McCain g...
Roger Ebert Gives Jay Mariotti A Strategically Placed Thumb On His Way Out The Door
If there are any more questions about Jay Mariotti's awfulness and how actively despised he is by most people at the Chicago Sun-Times, look no further than this internal letter being circulated around, oh, everywhere in Chicago's news rooms penned by Sun-Times movie critic Roger Ebert. The man sure...
Mitch "Wild Thing" Williams Ringing The NASDAQ Opening Bell Tomorrow
This is the most incongruous pairing of sports and the financial markets since Lenny Dykstra first emailed Jim Cramer. How did this happen? What in the world has the Wild Thing been up to since his baseball career ended? He started his own Wild Thing Southpaw Salsa. Well, of course he did. Mitch Wi...
The Farce of the Year
After weeks of speculation and negotiation the match has finally been made between the consensus pound-for-pound champion Manny Pacquiao and boxing's Golden Boy, Oscar De La Hoya. While this certainly qualifies as a "mega-fight" it is not to be confused with the Fight of the Year or the Mayweather-D...
The Chicago Sun-Times Won't Even Attempt To Contain Its Excitement
Yesterday, as the whole Jay Mariotti saga unfurled, longtime commenter Pete "Jayhawk" Gaines (and current combudsman at vroom-vroom central, Jalopnik) amusingly passed along an email exchange he'd had with Sun-Times EIC Michael Cooke: Sir: I wish to inform you that due to recent developments on the ...
Moon Over Parma: Those Indians Are White Hot
Has anyone noticed that the Cleveland Indians have won 10 in a row? And 16 of their past 19? Excitement is at a fever pitch along the Cuyahoga, where they're talking division title, ALCS, and World Series! (Checks AL Central standings. Carefully folds newspaper, slowly rises from desk and leaves roo...
Michael Phelps' Abs To Join Not Ready For Prime Time Players
As predicted in this Michael Phelps post at the end of his medal run, Michael Phelps will, in fact, be making an appearance on the season premiere of Saturday Night Live on Sept. 13th. What I didn't expect was that NBC would force him to warble through a hokey monologue and host the damn thing. Give...
The Internet Cautions Mr. Mariotti Not To Let The Door Hit Him In The Butt On The Way Out
So Jay Mariotti resigned from the Chicago Sun-Times on Tuesday night, prompting a flurry of reaction around the webtubes, a sampling of which we show you here. Most of it's anti-Jay, as you might guess; even this guy refuses to defend him. Mariotti; the only man Lassie ever refused to save from a we...
Roman Abramovich's Fantasy Football Team Is Better Than Yours
Apparently Roman Abramovich doesn't like being first runner-up. After completing the silver sweep last season—finishing second in the Premier League, the Carling Cup, and the Champions League—the Russian billionaire owner of Chelsea FC responded by purchasing half of the Portuguese-speaking world. F...
Michael Strahan's Life Became A Whole Lot Easier In More Ways Than One
Perhaps this is what he meant when he said he was enjoying retirement and declined to rejoin the Giants. You'll recall that Strahan and his wife entered into a rather stormy split. Included, among other things, were allegations that Strahan was gay. In the end, Strahan's wife, Jean Strahan, receive...
That's It World; You Have Disrespected Jay Mariotti For The Final Time
Details are beginning to trickle in on Jay Mariotti's sudden resignation from the Land of Newsprint, and it's pretty much what you would expect: Jay quitting in a hissy fit over a perceived slight. According to two reliable sources, Mariotti, just back from Beijing, wanted to write a column on Barac...
This Is Why Rock Fights Are Fun
So, there was this predictable exchange between the front desk guy in my apartment building and another guy as I went out to grab some smokes while the Phillies were down 7-1 in the 4th inning last night to the Mets. "Of course they'd come down to earth. Take 4 from the Dodgers then they get blown o...
Jay Mariotti: Quits Chicago Sun-Times Before Struggling Newspaper Business "Takes Him Down With It"
Wow. Based on the enormous amount of emails flooding Deadspin's inbox, you would've thought that there was an assassination of a beloved sports figure or a towering inferno at Yankee Stadium. Nope. The reason for the deluge was because Jay Mariotti, after 17 years of vituperative hackdom, has decide...
ESPN Going Inside the Sperm Bank
Suffering from an Olympic letdown? Not willing to watch the Democratic Convention? Well, ESPN would like to take you inside the world of athlete sperm on E:60. Yep, tonight at 7 eastern, it's Sperm U. ...
College Football Previews: #3 Ohio State
Today's preview is brought to us by Matt from Buckeye Commentary. We're just two days away from kickoff. Is your blood not pounding at the thought of Oregon State-Stanford? STRENGTHS Stiff-arm delivering running back? Check. Best cover corner in college football? Check. Sick linebackers and the nat...
Mr. Met Sez: Damn It Feels Good To Be A Gangsta
If there's one thing I've learned in this world, it's that you do not f—- with Mr. Met. He has a bad attitude and a collection of shivs he made in prison, so watch out. Just look at this photo, where Mr. Met is saying "Don't f—- with my hos, or I will STICK YOU, man!" And witness the video following...