el Page 2344 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Darren McFadden's Parents Aren't Saying Nothin' About Nothin'
"Yes he is." "No he isn't." "Is too." "Is not." "Shut up." "You shut up." "No, you shut up first." "No, your mom's ugly." There, now you're officially caught up to speed on the ongoing struggle between Darren McFadden's parents and media reports alleging their son is turning pro after his junior yea...

Celtics Begin To Develop A Cellulite Problem
Know how supermodels stay thin? By being called fat at 110 pounds. It's the only way they'll learn. Judge them. Cut them down. You really want a thin slice of carrot cake? Because that dress you love doesn't come in fat cow size....

If you're a fan of beatdown basketball, top-ranked North Carolina has a slight lead over NC State at halftime, 43-13. If this gets any worse, the Heels might put skip their bench players and just sub in the Saint Louis Billikens. [Yahoo! Sports] Update: NC State had kind of a better second half with...

Biding Time Until Tonight's NFL Playoffs
Considering the NFL playoffs don't begin until 4:30 and you can't sleep in until 4 on Saturdays anymore (ah, freshman year), the afternoon consists of very little beyond college basketball. So my retro video game recommendation today is Kid Chamelon for the Sega Genesis. Back then it was very meta t...

Who Are We? "The Blues!" Who Are We Gonna Beat? "The Blues!"
There doesn't seem to be a bevy of interesting games — even for soccer fans! — save for one game, Man City and Everton. They're separated by a mere three points at the top of the standings "tables," and Man City hasn't lost a game "match" to anyone recently except Tottenham. That kind of consistency...

Smith Street (NSFW)
This is AJ Daulerio's final Cultural Oddsmaker for Deadspin. Email him to let him know what you think....

Strahan Would Totally Tap That
At first glance it's moral support from an unlikely source: Giants defensive end Michael Strahan says that Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson should be given their space. Leave Romo alone! He's a human being! Etc., etc. But you and I know what the real deal is here. Hey Tony, if you ever get tired of her...

Brady Quinn's Unfortunate Circumstances
With the news yesterday that the Browns are looking to sign Derek "Horse Balls" Anderson to long-term contract, we look ominously to a future that, sadly ... could be Brady Quinn-less....

Nebraska's New Coach Is Quite Handsome
A reader who went to the BCS Championship Game sends in this photo of former LSU defensive coordinator and new Nebraska coach Bo Pelini, rocking the French Quarter at 3 a.m....

Upset In Beantown
The NBA Closer is written by our Canadian weekend maestro J.E. Skeets. When he's not busy scouring the box scores or voting Benson '08, he can be heard on The Basketball Jones daily podcast....

To Watch Tonight
What to watch after you once again blow off your trip to the Museum of Laziness ... • College basketball: Duke at Temple (7 p.m., ET). Won't be the same without Dickie V's barbed-wire irritating tones [ESPN]; Pittsburgh at South Florida (7:30 p.m., ET) [ESPN2] • NBA: Detroit at Dallas (9 p.m., ET). ...

Len Pasquarelli Has Some Words For Anyone Else Who Dares "Report"
Almost anyone who has ever dealt with ESPN's Len Pasquarelli tells us he's kind of a dick. And by "kind of a dick," we mean, "actively chewing the heads off kittens while he's speaking to you." You can add Portfolio magazine's Jeff Bercovici to that list....


Rick Ankiel's Depressing Big Buddy
Now that college football is over, and we have less than a month of the NFL left to go, perhaps we take a moment and look toward baseball. How about that heartwarming, inspiring story of, oh, what's his name .......

Tough Times In Steeltown
We have made no secret of our enduring love of The Dugout, both in its original incarnation and its current, non-expletive form at AOL Sports. But you think these guys just know baseball? Pshaw....

Brett Favre And The Men Who Love Him
I just love it when a journalist develops a man crush on an athlete and loses all perspective. It seems to happen a lot with Brett Favre for some reason; perhaps its his indominable spirit ... or his eyes, which are like limpid pools ... . Anyway, count Frank Cooney, founder and publisher of The Spo...

Peter Gammons Rocking Out The Mitchell Report Blues
We'll get into Roger Clemens more a little bit later — because we know you can just never get enough Roger Clemens and steroids talk, obviously — but we wanted to take a moment to salute Peter Gammons, everyone's favorite Andrew Jackson-impersonating, hard-rockin' baseball reporter....

Where In The World Is Jose Lima?
This is a sad thing for us all to come to terms with, but Jose Lima — along with his, uh, ample wife — is not going to be in the majors next season. But worry not: There's always Korea....

ESPN's Featured Comment Of The Day
ESPN combed its message boards this morning to find its wittiest, boldest, most enlightening comment, and chose this one above all others ......
