et Page 2110 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

It's Not Like The Mets Are In A Position To Ignore Advice
Do you know how bad the Mets are? The Mets are so bad that a team from Long Island is filming an instructional video to help, even if they play slow-pitch softball and they're sponsored by an assisted living company....

Rick Reilly® In A One-Piece: Toothsome
Reilly® squeezes into a LZR Racer in tonight's edition of that Homecoming show no one is watching. This one features Michael Phelps and a hack columnist's left nipple. [ESPN]...

Minnesota Media Treating Favre's (Pending? Inevitable?) Arrival With Restraint
The Minneapolis Star-Tribune isn't missing out on an opportunity to set purple hearts aflutter, so they've decided the best way to satisfy their wild-eyed readers infected with Favre Fever is to dedicate an entire section to him....

Rick Pitino Didn't Do That Thing Karen Sypher Said He Did, Probably
Louisville police will not prosecute Rick Pitino for whatever it is Karen Sypher allegedly tried to blackmail him with. So I guess we'll never get a steamy "Law & Order"-style courtroom drama starring the saucy Cardinals coach....

Is That A Threat, Detroit?
The Lions ill-advisedly offer to let their fans relive 0-16, anytime they want. Gee, thanks. [H/T: Reader Tim]...

Fox's Marketing Ploy May Have Been More Evil Than Previously Thought
It's bad enough that stupid Yuppie Gollum was nothing but a promotional stunt, but this is so much worse: A reader reports that Yuppie Gollum wasn't even at the All-Star Game. I'll let that sink in....

Lamest Excuse Ever Helps Tennis Player Beat Drug Rap
French tennis player Richard Gasquet told officials that the reason he tested positive for cocaine last March was because he kissed a woman who had cocaine on her lips....and that worked! Suspension over! It's strip club time! [BBC]...

Erin Andrews' Chin Has Healed Nicely...
But it appears she was attacked by a tiger before the ESPYs last night. Hope she's okay. [TMZ/Hot Clicks]...

Jason Whitlock Vs. Marty B In Racial Flame War ‘09: WHO YA GOT? (UPDATED)
Our favorite oozing pumpkin Jason Whitlock is forging an Enemies List not seen since the last days of Richard Nixon: Selena Roberts, Serena Williams, Hamstring Stretches, etc....

Yes, This Creepy Person Was a Marketing Ploy By Fox
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

Sex, Gambling and Gluttony In The Morning. And Some Sports.
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Blackhawks GM Fired For Not Following Example Set By Cubs
Dale Tallon took over a terrible post-lockout Blackhawks franchise, combined shrewd drafting and solid free agent picks to build a young, exciting contender and was rewarded for his efforts with a swift kick in the pants. That's the Chicago way....

Why Pete Rose Didn't Ruin Ray Fosse's Career
No list of All-Star memories is complete without Pete Rose's decision to lower the boom on Ray Fosse, single-handedly destroying the young catcher's career in 1970. Unfortunately for the enemies of hustle, that's not quite how the story goes....

Robert Lunn Leaves Austria With His Dignity (Mostly) Intact
Robert Lunn is a former defensive tackle from UConn. He graduated in 2008 and was playing professional football in Pörtschach, Austria. Sadly, he's back in the U.S. now, so this is his final column....

Mets Fans Even Boo Their Rotten Apple
More surprising: the Mets hitting back-to-back home runs, or Citi Field's Home Run Apple engineered without that possibility in mind? The Apple finally emerged minutes after the second homer, giving the crowd something to cheer about, for once. [Star-Ledger]...

Deadspin Classic: A Disco Inferno
In an alternate universe, Deadspin's archives would cover the whole scope of human history. Occasionally, we like to revisit those timeless moments that we would have written about, if only we could have. Today: The night disco died....

Nicole Bobek Made Fast Friends In Prison
The New York Daily News published a comprehensive rise-and-fall on the meth-peddling former figure skater but NJ.com gets the real gravy: Bobek endeared herself to inmates through tube-top wizardry. [NJ.com]...

USA Eliminated By Croatia In Davis Cup Quarters
This is utterly shocking news to those who had no idea the Davis Cup was even going on right now. [UPI]...

All-Star Party At Old Man Leyland's Cancelled
Jim Leyland's wife was going to host an All-Star Game party, but he requested a nice, peaceful night at home. (Translation: he wants to do it.) [MLive]...

His Name Is Also What the Police Did
Kansas Jayhawks basketball player Chase Buford — son of San Antonio Spurs general manager R.C. Buford — was arrested on suspicion of driving while hammered. [KMBC]...