et Page 2114 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Thabeet Takes His Balls to Memphis
2. Memphis Grizzles Hasheem Thabeet, UConn It's just the second pick of the draft and David Stern's voice is already cracking. It's his Bar Mitzvah all over again! As for Thabeet, he looks tall and shiny....
Please Help The Stephen A. Heckling Society Of Gentlemen
Sad news: The Stephen A. Heckling Society of Gentlemendid not get tickets to tonight's NBA Draft. If anyone can get these invaluable correspondents into WaMu this evening, please contact me at [email protected] Let the sock roar again....
Magglio Ordonez Loses His Magically Silky Hair
After being benched for terribleness, the Tigers "slugger" has shorn his legendary flowing locks. (You can maybe buy them on eBay.) So did it have the intended Reverse Samson effect? Two-for-four! Against the Cubs? Ok, that's inconclusive evidence. [Detroit4Lyfe]...
The United States-Spain Aftermath: Fun With Google Translations
"Suddenly, the fluid Xavi football, friendships imaginative patent associations disappeared. United States, with its two lines that tightened the nuts of a submarine, had sprayed the tiqui-taca."...
A Great White Shark Ate This Man's Hand
I find it amazing how after surfers get attacked by sharks ,some of them jump right back in the ocean and continue the sport with less body parts. But here's another handless Aussie surfer walking through the raindrops....
The Greatest Upset In The History Of Sports (This Week)
The United States has just flabbergasted the world, ending Spain's 35-match unbeaten streak with a 2-nil shutout of the planet's No. 1 team. Put that in your vuvuzela and blow on it....
Sportswear Company Outplays Nike, Loses Anyway
It's a classic underdog tale—an upstart company devises a brilliant product plan, employs pluck and good fortune to make their dream a reality, and takes on the big boys....and then is summarily crushed by a large, multinational corporation....
Billy Beane Is A Golden God: Excerpts From The Scrapped Moneyball Script
It looks like Moneyball might not be coming to the big screen anytime soon because director Steven Soderbergh tinkered with the script and everyone realized that a movie version of the book made about as much sense as Joe Morgan....
Rex Ryan Llits Selttab Aixelsyd
"If you have dyslexia, you can still reach your goals. And understand, it'll be a negative, no question, it's a challenge. But if you overcome it, you can do some great things..." [NYPOST]...
Scoring At Home: Your <em>SportsCenter</em> Catchphrase-O-Meter
An occasional feature in which we explain and evaluate a SportsCenter anchor's pet phrase. Today's phrase: "I know a cat named Way Out Willy."...
Joey Votto: Not Gay, Just Having Terrible Anxiety Attacks
"The one night I was alone, the very first night I was alone, was when I went to the hospital. I couldn't take it. It just got to the point where I felt I was going to die, really." [Outsports/GraneyAndThePig/MLB.com]...
One Sporting Event That's Too Dangerous For Bylines
Chances are, you've never been to Myanmar. And correct me if I'm wrong, but you've also never been to a soccer game in Myanmar, because it's Myanmar, and because it's illegal for five people to gather in the same place....
USC Knows How To Pick Coaches
Trojan athletic director Mike Garrett says he'll put his hiring record up against anybody's record, provided that record doesn't include all the coaches who turned him down before he was stuck with Pete Carroll....
When On Hannity, Jay Feely Does As The Hannitys Do
What's new with Jay Feely? Well, he eagled the par-5 eighth at Liberty National on Monday, and he's all fired up. Oh, and later that day, he went on Hannity and told the nation he's scared of President Obama....
Breaking: North Carolina Natives Prefer Ol' Roy To Coach K
Roy Williams has a higher in-state approval rating than Mike Krzyzewski, but here's the shock statistic: Only 14 percent have an "unfavorable opinion" of K. Must be that we (part-time) North Carolinians put country first. [Under The Dome, PPP]...
FAVRE. FAVRE. FAVRE. FAVRE.
Florio hints that Vikes may have already signed him, but are holding the announcement until July 3rd to reduce media overload. Best way to bury the Favre story? Have Artie Lange accuse Joe Buck of jizzing on his chest. [PFT]...
<em>Moneyball</em>'s Deep-Sixed
Break out the baseball puns! Columbia has dropped Steven Soderbergh's Moneyball adaptation like an overvalued, arbitration-eligible pitcher after a career year. Why, it's as if producers made a running, 20-foot backhand flip to cut down the movie at the plate....
Joe Morgan Clarifies One Fib, Possibly Tells Another
As you know, Joe Morgan, the human sic, told a bit of a stretcher during last Sunday's broadcast. Yesterday, he clarified the matter in a way only Joe Morgan could. By maybe lying again....
The Trials of Willie, The Inflatable Dry-Humping Shark
Willie, the mighty Tiburón, is the air-assisted mascot of a popular junior soccer team in Colombia. Unfortunately, Willie's enthusiasm occasionally gets the better of him and he recently got suspended for disrespecting an opposing team. With his crotch....
Lance Armstrong Takes On The Wall Street Journal, Lance Armstrong Tweet-Reports
Last month, Lance Armstrong boycotted the media, speaking directly to his fans in 140-character chunks. He tried to break the ban by writing a letter to The WSJ, but they "butchered it," and instead, he printed it on his blog....