ew Page 2934 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Serena Williams Gives Us A French Open Collapse For The Ages
After winning the first set handily from someone named Virginie Razzano, Serena Williams was leading the second set tiebreak 5-1. She dropped six straight points for the set, and the first five games of the third (in which Serena only managed six points)....

"They Had To Apply Electric Shock To Bring Him Back": The Decline Of Boxer David Reid, Hero Of The 1996 Olympics
Republished from The Ring....

Are You A Current Or Former Make-Up Person At ESPN? Do You Know One? Please Contact Us.
Do you (or did you) work in the make-up department at ESPN HQ in Bristol? We've heard some, erm, stories. About certain, um, talent. Email me at [email protected]. I'll explain....

Jim Leyland Was Righteously Pissed At Some Terrible Umpiring
In the second inning of yesterday's matinee in Boston, Mike Aviles struck out. Well, he should have struck out. He swung and missed and everything. But the home plate umpire ruled that catcher Gerald Laird had short-hopped the catch, and on his second try, Aviles stroked an RBI single. It would lead...

The Dolphins Will Be On <em>Hard Knocks</em>
After every interesting team in the NFL decided they weren't interested, and after we feared it might come down to the eager Jaguars, up steps a team that no one predicted. It's the dark horse fish mammals, the Miami Dolphins, that will be featured on HBO's Hard Knocks....

"Some People Have To Be Protected Against Themselves": Hockey League Pleads With Players To Stop Boozing During Games
Today's overwrought rec league email carries a tinge of desperation. Coming to us from an adult hockey league in the Chicago suburbs, it's a cry in the dark from an overworked, under-appreciated league director, who wonders why a bunch of grown men can't get together to play hockey without drinking ...

World Celebrates As Celebrity Chef Gordon Ramsay Seriously Injured In Charity Soccer Match
Professional asshole Gordon Ramsay left Sunday's Soccer Aid charity match in Manchester on a stretcher after a hefty tackle by former English soccer star Teddy Sheringham left the Hell's Kitchen chef in pain and gasping for air....

Paul Konerko Is An MVP Candidate, And Possibly Psychic
Just a few scant months ago, the White Sox were seriously contemplating naming Paul Konerko a player-manager. It would have been an honor, but an honor usually bestowed on well-respected baseball minds in the twilight of their careers. (Never mind that Konerko's 2011 "twilight" was yet another .300,...

Tim Kurkjian, George Will, And Charles Krauthammer Host World's Most Insufferable Lunch
Syndicated political columnist Charles Krauthammer decided to phone in his pre-Memorial Day column, and, in turn, wound up introducing us to the world's most insufferable get-together. He presents:...

Saturday's United States-Scotland Friendly Featured A Clash Of Terribly-Performed National Anthems
The U.S. Men's National Team thrashed Scotland 5-1 in Jacksonville Saturday on the strength of a Landon Donovan hat trick, but the festival atmosphere at EverBank Field (where the attendance of 44,438 set a record for national friendlies in the state) was nearly snuffed out before the match ever be...

Today Is The Day Craig James Gets Demolished In The Election
This is it: the polls are officially open for voting in the Republican primary for Texas's vacant Senate seat. Today is the day Craig James finds out if his gay-baiting self-funding, low-polling, hooker-murder-denying Senate campaign will bear fruit, or be all for naught. Judging from the latest num...

Chris Bosh Spent Last Night In His Own Little Place Of Bliss
Injured Heat forward Chris Bosh spent last night's Eastern Conference Finals Game One on the bench, though he certainly didn't seem to be missing much about playing the game. Indeed, most opportunities viewers were given to look in on Bosh showed a man at ease with the lofty predictions for his tea...

Tonight LeBron Needs To Eat Some Old Irish Hearts
Bumblederping around the Web today it's surprising to see how many people expect the Celtics to curl up and die quiet in their series against the Heat, which begins tonight. David Steele over at the Sporting News is among the rare authors who believe three future Hall of Famers plus a tripler of dou...

People Call This Rugby Player "Beast." See If You Can Guess Why.
When you're young and stupid this is how you imagine all sports moments ought to look, like something out of a G-rated movie about an all-star donkey who plays point guard, or one of those daydream sandlot plays that involves you jumping off a friend's shoulders to catch the would-be home run. Then...

Carlos Beltrán Does Not Want You Asking Trivia Questions About Him
Cardinals outfield Carlos Beltrán may rank sixth in extra-base hits among active players, but he clearly thinks he's #1 at something—as his use of nonverbals at today's Braves-Cardinals game displayed. (Enjoy the SportSouth crew fumbling to cover for the extended middle finger.)...

Johnny Tapia Died, Died, Died, Died, Then Died, And Lived Hard In Between
New Mexico police are saying that boxer Johnny Tapia was found dead at his house on Sunday. They do not suspect foul play. Apparently he was the victim of having been Johnny Tapia for 45 years. ...

The Odds Ever Favor The Truly Regional NCAA Baseball Bracket
The NCAA has just announced its baseball championship bracket, to approximately one billionth of the fanfare that its annual orgy of uneducated guesswork, the basketball championships, engenders. But take a moment to appreciate the symmetry, and the humble nature of the appropriately named Regionals...

Once Again Northwestern Wins Nth Women's Lacrosse Title in N+1 Years
The women's lacrosse team from Northwestern University out-lacrossed the women's lacrosse team from Syracuse University on Sunday to win the program's seventh national title in eight years, a laudable feat of consistent ass-kicking that becomes all the more impressive when you consider the key word ...

The Flaming Lips, Oklahoma City's Only Other Reason For Being, Rewrite 1999 Track to Celebrate Thunder
While the Thunder ponder what might have been in San Antonio last night if they hadn't committed four offensive fouls in the fourth quarter, or if they'd defended Manu Ginobili with something sturdier than hard glares, they can regroup to the flattering sounds of OKC's favorite local psychedelic roc...

Look Mom, No Hands: Home Run Edition
Old Man Moyer will be shaking his cane at kids for days after this one. On a day when he gave up four home runs and allowed seven runs against the Cincinnati Reds, this right here will stick in his craw most. Todd Frazier hit a home run in the bottom of the fourth by essentially throwing his bat at...