ew Page 3057 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
<em>Scenes From a Marriage</em>, But Longer And With Fart Jokes. <em>The Five-Year Engagement</em>, Reviewed.
1. There are several long stretches in which The Five-Year Engagement is the polar opposite of what anyone would consider "romantic" or "comedy." Jason Segel has always had a tinge of self-aggrandizing self-pity in his characters—the ones he plays, the ones he writes, and both—but for swaths of The ...
Bill Polian Is Talking Out His Ass
I don't know Bill Polian. Seems nice enough. Had success everywhere he's been. He's probably a bright guy. But in his new life as ESPN talking head, he's taking just about the dumbest possible position on the latest Saints scandal, and sticking to it with all his might....
Adorable Dog Wins Stupid Contest At Reds Game
This is Treasure, everybody. Treasure's day yesterday probably began as most days do: Lots of eating, sleeping, and pooping—a comfortable, happy monotony occasionally interrupted by scratching, walking, and a few barks out the window at that kid who has the nerve to keep riding up and down the block...
New Era's "Chicago Vs. Chicago" Spot Is Actually Set At A Hoboken Bar
Official MLB cap provider New Era's launched a series of ads titled "Chicago Vs. Chicago" in which popular character actors Nick Offerman and Craig Robinson argue over the merits of the Cubs versus the White Sox. This debate takes place, as we're led to believe in an establishing shot, in a Chicago...
The Jaguars Desperately Want You To Believe Everybody Loves Ryan Tannehill
This is how your NFL draft sausage is made, and it's not pretty: with lies and misdirection and identity fraud and a whole lot of desperation....
The Dirty Secrets Of A Sports Arena, As Revealed By A Drunk Stadium Employee Emailing Us At 5:30 P.M.
Last month, I got an email from a guy who works Lightning games at the Tampa Bay Times Forum. Our informant was piss drunk and looking for a place to vent about his job. It will shock and stun you to learn that stadium arenas do not operate like they did on that one Matthew Perry sitcom. I'll let ou...
The Nets Can't Wait To Get The Hell Out Of New Jersey
These days, NBA teams evidently unveil hashtags before their new logos. Either way, nice touch on the Jay-Z reference and only six more days until the move to Brooklyn becomes official....
This Video With A Bunch of Brawling Young Men Is "A Goddamn <em>Lord Of The Flies</em> Snuff Film"
Welcome to Tuesday Night Fights, a weekly celebration and analysis of street-fight videos found on YouTube. Tonight's fisticuffs: "Brawl," or "4:39 of mostly shirtless foreign dudes re-enacting a dust bowl food-ration war of attrition." Tonight's commentator: Your favorite Dead Wrestler of the Wee...
Rich Bros' "Ragematch" At Elite Athletic Club Leads To Arrests, Shame
The New York Athletic Club is the most prestigious private sports club in the country. It was founded in 1868, costs $8,000 to join (plus $3,000 more every year), and has produced more than 230 Olympic medalists. And yet, even the hallowed halls of this architectural landmark aren't immune to good ...
Watch This 28-Year-Old Latvian Pull Off An Insane Basketball Shot
Look, I don't know for a fact that 28-year-old Armands Skele of BC Kalev/Cramo Tallinn grew up idolizing one J.R. Rider, but this insane three-pointer from last night conjures up some "Play of the Decade" memories for those of a certain age....
How To Make A Pipe Out Of <em>ESPN The Magazine</em>'s Stupid Weed-Panic Issue
The latest issue of ESPN The Magazine contains a feature by Mark Schlabach about college football's marijuana "problem." It is, as we've noted, one of the most useless sports-and-drugs stories ever committed to paper. But not entirely useless! The video above provides step-by-step instructions f...
Nets CEO Says Team Will Be Good Next Year Even Without Deron Williams
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: All Gerald Wallace, all the time....
![BREAKING: Has Jose Canseco's Twitter Account Been Deleted? [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17klndafr14q4jpg.jpg)
BREAKING: Has Jose Canseco's Twitter Account Been Deleted? [UPDATE]
There's no hug stores. No bubble boy. No killing Al Gore. No courage. @JoseCanseco looks like it's gone, but Amy K. Nelson says Canseco's rep told her the account has not been deleted and that they're trying "to figure this out." We'll have more as this develops. [HardballTalk]...
What <em>The Avengers</em> Means For The Future Of Comic-Book Movies
Tomorrow, Marvel's The Avengers will open in certain parts of the globe—not the U.S., which won't see the film until May 4—and Marvel's four-year odyssey of laying the groundwork for this action blockbuster will finally be over. It's been an impressive run commercially, if not always critically. (Ca...
The Saints Couldn't Have Benefited From Wiretapping? Really?
There are plenty of very good reasons to question ESPN's report that Saints GM Mickey Loomis was able to eavesdrop on opposing coaches during the first three seasons of his tenure. There's the lack of a named source. The dearth of evidence beyond said unnamed sources. The fact that it happened seven...
High School Pitcher Throws Rare "Perfect" Perfect Game
Looking out across the Taxonomy of Single Perfect Game Excellence, you'd find the only feat rarer than throwing a perfect game is a "perfect" perfect game: No batter reaches base and every out is recorded by strikeout. That's a club that Kate Upton wouldn't let Philip Humber into, but she would let ...
John Terry Was Sent Off From The Champions League Semifinal After Pulling A Metta World Peace
Minutes after Barcelona scored to tie the aggregate at 1-1, Chelsea captain John Terry was sent off for one of the dumbest stunts seen in the Champions League in years: kneeing Barça striker Alexis Sánchez in the back....
Better Know An Umpire: Ed Hickox
Welcome to Better Know An Umpire, an effort to educate ourselves on the human elements who have ultimate decision-making power over some 2,500 Major League Baseball games a year. (All cumulative statistics are through the 2011 season, unless otherwise stated.)...
ESPN Writer Has <em>The Protocols Of Zion</em> On His Bookshelf
Late last week, ESPN's MMA writer Franklin McNeil appeared on an ESPN.com video previewing the big UFC pay-per-view fight between Jon Jones and Rashad Evans. In the video, McNeil talked about the bout while sitting in front of his bookshelf at his home. Clever D.I.Y. stagecraft! (Just a few weeks ag...
More Interesting Than Watching A Royals Game From Behind Home Plate: Books
Here's an esteemed gent in the high-price seats of Kauffman Stadium using a leisurely weeknight at the ballpark to catch up on some reading. Several of you wrote in to make fun of this guy, but I'm a bit reluctant to really go after him; it's the ninth inning of a Royals game (which they were, as u...