ew Page 3348 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

This Poor Ball Boy Wasn't Trained In The Art Of Catching A Soccer Ball Before It Hits His Face
Poor little Australian fella working the sidelines at a Queensland State game turned in a valiant attempt to catch a soccer ball rebounding off a wall behind the goal. He failed to do so....

This Week In Unintentional Dong Submissions
This week is an example of quality over quantity in the realm of unintentional dong submissions. Many were submitted, few made it through quality control....

Joe Morgan Led The World's Largest Chicken Dance With Attractive Ladies In German Dresses Yesterday
Oktoberfest Zinzinnati got underway in Cincinnati yesterday. In addition to "music from Bavarian band Musikkapelle Hopfenblaesers" and "The World Bratwurst Eating Championship," there was revelry and there was dance....

Watch Luke McCown And Mark Sanchez Take Quarterback Ineptitude To New Heights
If you wanted to watch two NFL quarterbacks at the top of their craft doing battle, the Jets-Jaguars game was not for you. If, instead, you were looking for failure begetting failure, Mark Sanchez and Luke McCown delivered....

Arkansas State's Football Coaches Have Uniquely Suggestive Play-Calling Signals
They may have lost 26-7 to Virginia Tech this weekend, but the coaching staff of the Arkansas State Red Wolves made quite an impression on tipster Doug W....

Watch Wayne Rooney Totally Flub A Penalty Kick Against Chelsea
Oh Shrek. Poor Shrek. His plant foot slipped while he was trying to put Manchester United up 4-1 on rival Chelsea, kicked the ball into his other foot sending it wide of the net and fell down go boom. (Start at 0:32 is the silent-picture aspect of the video bothers you)....

Poll: 54 Percent Of Washington D.C. Sports Fans Disapprove Of Daniel Snyder
"Twenty seasons after the Redskins won their last Super Bowl, just more than half of area sports fans say they view the team favorably. But more than a third have negative feelings about the hometown football team, according to a new Washington Post poll, and fans hold even stronger negative views ...

Photoshop Contest: Larry Merchant On The Edge
Larry Merchant had a little word war with Floyd Mayweather after Mayweather's controversial victory over Victor Ortiz last night. But when he turned to the camera, he gave an expression for the ages. For all ages. For many situations....

That Mayweather/Ortiz Fight Was Something, Wasn't It?
Your morning roundup for Sept. 18, the day we mourn the Marble Rye Lady. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Here's Ringside Video Of The Controversial Mayweather/Ortiz Fourth Round (UPDATE)
From NESW Sports, "This youtuber was sitting near the front row, and he caught an awesome vid of the end of this fight that will, at the very least, be talked about for some time. Mayweather wins by knockout. But how did we get there?"...

This Is What Larry Merchant Looked Like Before Telling Floyd Mayweather He'd Kick His Ass In 1961
Victor Ortiz headbutted Floyd Mayweather as the fourth round was coming to an end. Then, Mayweather knocked him out with two shots that most consider the cheapest of shots he's thrown in his career....

Here's UConn's Official Statement About The Iowa State Mascot Fiasco
UConn sports information director Mike Enright just emailed with an official comment about Iowa State's Cy the Mascot's broken arm. Here's what he wrote (the bold is his emphasis):...

It's Floyd Mayweather Vs. Victor Ortiz Fight Night In Las Vegas
Floyd Mayweather will make at least $25 million at work tonight. Victor Ortiz will make about a tenth of that. A tithing, if you will....

An Italian-League Goalkeeper Got Knocked Unconscious From A Kick To The Head (Video)
AS Roma goalkeeper Maarten Stekelenburg was hospitalized after getting kicked in the head by Inter Milan's Lucio during a scoreless Serie A draw today....

An Interesting Guest Will Visit The Pittsburgh Steelers Tomorrow
Tipsters Rich C. and Robert B. were watching today's Red Sox/Rays game on Fox when they noticed something peculiar about tomorrow's early slate of NFL games....

Four Arrested During Attempted Burglary At Manny Pacquiao's L.A. Mansion
Manny Pacquiao is relieved that authorities were quick to respond to a burglary attempt on his $2 million mansion Friday in Los Angeles. "I'm glad the burglary attempt was unsuccessful," said the boxer who was in Manila, thousands of miles away, when the attempt took place past noon yesterday. Pac...

Iowa State Mascot "Cy" Types Cryptically About His Arm Getting Broken At UConn
Zane Brugenhemke has plenty of photos of Cy the Iowa State Cyclones mascot on his Facebook page. This isn't some sort of weird furry fetish, for Zane Brugenhemke is Cy and Cy is Zane Brugenhemke....

Unemployed WR Terrell Owens Is The Selfish Driver Of A 2003 VW Beetle
"NFL star Terrell Owens was pulled over and cited in L.A. this week for allegedly driving SOLO in the carpool lane ... [A]ccording to law enforcement, once Owens was pulled over ... cops also cited him for an expired registration ... and having overly-tinted windows." [TMZ]...

Here's Video Of All Eight Goals In Barcelona's Victory Over Osasuna
Coming off a week that saw them muddle their way to a pair of draws, Barcelona defeated Osasuna 8-0 in La Liga action today. Lionel Messi had a hat trick, David Villa added a pair and Cesc Fabregas, Xavi and an Osasuna own goal rounded out the scoring. Unfair, the talent disparity in that league i...

Wife Of Former Vikings Player Charged In Fatal Hit-And-Run, Denies Knowing She Hit Someone
Amy Senser is the wife of former Minnesota Vikings TE Joe Senser. She's also an irresponsible driver/human who faces a felony charge for driving the Mercedes SUV which struck and killed 38-year-old Anousone Phanthavong on Aug. 23....