ew Page 3372 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

What ESPN Will Be Talking About Today: Special Playmaker Chris Johnson Makes Special Plays, Needs Money
A new feature in which we condense your morning SportsCenter to its essence....

It's Bruce Chen's World, And We're All Just Renting Space
How's this for an unlikely sentence fragment? "Chen won four consecutive starts for the first time in his career..."...

Relief: Oddibe McDowell Has Paid His Overdue Water Bill, And This Month's Water Bill Is Only $59.39
Via Broward County Water and Wastewater Services. Earlier coverage of Oddibe McDowell's water bill:...

Brought To You By The Network That Televises The Little League World Series
It's Aug. 24, the day we were too busy to run for mayor of Wasilla. Click the photo to enlarge. If that doesn't work, click here. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors. ...

Sally Jenkins's Pat Summitt Piece Will Break Your Heart
Jenkins, the longtime Washington Post writer, is one of Summitt's best friends. She discloses that in her piece, which you should read now....

Here Is Andy Samberg Playing Both 70s Bjorn Borg And John McEnroe On The Cover Of <em>NYT Magazine</em>
OK, this is kind of cool. Tennis and the New York Times being weirdly not-stodgy, everybody!...

John Starks Was A Gifted Grocery Store Employee, And Other Stories From Slate's <em>Hang Up And Listen</em> Podcast
Our friends at Slate do a fine weekly sports podcast called Hang Up and Listen, which is a thing that callers to WFAN often tell Mike Francesa they will do. But Josh Levin is more insightful than Mike Francesa!...

Cops, 49ers Will Work To Make Fans Less Drunk After Especially Drunken Raiders-49ers Game
The annual drunk brawl between 49ers and Raiders fans took place this past weekend, and it was, historically speaking, more drunk and brawl-y than usual. In what essentially amounts to a timeout for grown-ups, both teams have requested that the NFL "indefinitely suspend" the annual preseason "Battle...

Pat Summitt Diagnosed With Dementia, Will Still Coach This Season (Updated With Summitt's Taped Statement)
Sad news out of Knoxville: CBS's Gregg Doyel reports that Pat Summitt—head coach of Tennessee's women's basketball team and the most successful coach in NCAA history—has been diagnosed with dementia. She's just 59 years old. ...

Albert Haynesworth Has Two Words For Washington
It's not "fuck you." It might as well be....

Angel Pagan Was Busy Taking A Shit When He Was Due Up To Bat
"Apparently Pagan 'felt a rumble at the end of the fourth' and ended up spending a significant portion of the fifth shitting, while his coach screamed his name from the dugout in vain." [NYDN, via Gawker]...

The Newark Bears Will Celebrate Jim Leyritz Night With A $2,000 M.A.D.D. Donation And A Beer Pong Tournament
Even without mixed drinks, it sends mixed signals. A year ago, Leyritz was found innocent of felony manslaughter, but guilty of DUI in a 2007 crash....

Bill Belichick Wants To Abolish The Extra Point, Because Why The Hell Not?
Hooded evil genius cum Patriots coach Bill Belichick has a weekly radio appearance on WEEI—unlike David Portnoy—and, in this week's, he just started spitballing. It's the preseason, and the Patriots have been an easy 2-0, so, why bother with talking about the team?...

Favre Look-Alike Wasn't Trying To Fool Anyone By Wearing Favre Jersey Around Green Bay
Remember that guy who went to a Packers practice last week and impersonated a certain No. 4 known for gunslinging photos of his dong via text? His name is Kirk Ermatinger, he's from Ripon, Wis., and a Green Bay television station has caught up with him. Yes, Ermatinger acknowledged, he looks just l...

What ESPN Will Be Talking About Today: The Win Is Fake, But The Injuries Are Real
A new feature in which we condense your morning SportsCenter to its essence....

Kool Aid Man Really Wanted To Catch That Foul Ball
Your morning roundup for Aug. 23, the day they found a lot of semen in a fancy hotel room. H/T to bigsombrero for the photo. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

The Only Thing Worse Than A Drake Song Is A DeJuan Blair Cover Of A Drake Song
Unlike his NBA brethren, who are working at the local Home Depots, assistant coaching at Division I schools, and throwing down in local leagues, Spurs forward DeJuan Blair is apparently spending his extended off-season recording covers of terrible pop songs that are a mere two months old....

Sabermetrix Are For Kids: Introducing Our Little League World Series Power Ranking And Prediction Engine
We're a few days into the Little League World Series, which means it's time to unveil our system for evaluating the teams: DRURY, or Determination of Robustness of Undoubtedly Rambunctious Youths. It takes box score statistics from every game, converts them into a composite runs scored and allowed p...

School Of Fight: Learning To Brawl With The Hockey Goons Of Tomorrow (Deadspin Classic)
Last week, Glenn Stout, editor of Houghton Mifflin's Best American Sports Writing series, announced the lineup for the 2011 edition of the book. Among the stories was Jake Bogoch's dispatch from a notorious hockey fight camp for kids, where our writer took a teenager's punch to the kidneys and found...

Jimmy Rollins Is Going On The DL, According To Jimmy Rollins
Guess the Phillies' PR staff can pretty much take the afternoon off....