ew Page 3548 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Mets Welcome Redundant, Gramatically Questionable Triple-A Team
The New York Mets' Triple-A affiliate is now located in Buffalo, where it had been previously associated with the Cleveland Indians. But, I thought the plural of Bison was Bison? [New York Daily News]...

Yankees Want Manny, Building Ark For Rest Of Acquisitions
Yankees going hard to the hoop on Manny Ramirez ... three years, $25 million per year? May include a share of Madonna. [New York Daily News]...

SHOTY Elite Eight: Chris Cooley Vs. Erin Andrews
To be honest, I'm a little surprised by this matchup: Caitlin Davis seemed to have solid upset potential, and Erin Andrews ... well, I guess you can't underestimate the power of the sideboob....

Bill Simmons Conspiracy Theories And The State Of Edginess At The WWL (Update)
We get all sorts of amazing Bill Simmons conspiracy theories sent to the email box each week....

New Red Sox Logo A Hit Among Males 15-25, Bank Robbers
New Red Sox promotional slogan for 2009: We're Armed And Should Be Considered Dangerous ... or, Wanted In Connection With Fun And Excitement!...

Stephon Marbury Just Can't Stop Smiling, Making Knicks Uncomfortable
The Deadspin Morning Video Wake Up Call needs your help. If you have any suggested videos to fill this space, email us. Subject: Morning Video Wake Up Call...

Giants Honk The Horn?
The silver lining in the Plaxico Burress saga? Joe Horn is (maybe) back, baby! [NJ Star-Ledger]...

Plaxico Is Gonna Need A Bigger Boat!
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Mets To Be Rescued By The Power Of Booze And Mr. Celery?
Long Island Booze Baron Martin Silver is riding to the rescue to buy the New York Mets, whom he's sure are broke, so that they "don't fall into the wrong hands." Like, with someone who doesn't taunt people with poultry?...

Mets Broke Due To Madoff Scandal? Let's Do The Math
Forgive New York Mets fans if they're not swelling with pride over being connected to one of the biggest investment frauds in the history of money. But will the Madoff Scandal affect the Mets' ability to sign players?...

Robert Flores: The Tony Danza Of SportsCenter
ESPN afternoon SportsCenter anchor Robert Flores took some time to answer my moronic email questions. He's good like that....

Andy Pettitte's Secret Santa
Who is the "mystery team" offering Andy Pettitte three years and $36 million? Let me ride my unicorn over to my crystal ball to find out. [NJ.com]...

A Night Out With (A Presumably Unarmed) Plaxico
Here's Plaxico Burress, looking none the worse for wear — but sitting down, of course — at Kevin Powell’s 8th Annual Holiday Party and Clothing Drive at the Madison nightclub on Friday night....

Tiger Is Not Amused
Tiger Woods responds to comments made by his caddie, Steve Williams, about Phil Mickelson. Someone's not getting their usual tip, methinks. [NBCSports]...

Giants Eject Their Biggest Fan
It's clear that Jeremy Shockey appreciates the New York Giants' most enthusiastic, buoyant fan, Sondra Fortunato. Meadowlands security personnel, however, do not, as Sondra was ejected on Sunday while dressed as a Santa....

The FIGJAM commenteth
"After seeing Steve Williams' comments all I could think of was how lucky I am to have a class act like Bones (Mickelson's caddy Jim MacKay) on my bag and representing me." Mickelson's team also refuted the "nice tats" story, saying it was about a European Tour player (my guess: Colin Montgomerie), ...

Antonio Pierce Has Got Those Hands That Feel
The Deadspin Morning Video Wake Up Call needs your help. If you have any suggested videos to fill this space, email us. Subject: Morning Video Wake Up Call....

Auburn Hires Gene Chizik; Big 12, SEC Laugh Together
Later today Auburn will introduce Iowa State coach Gene Chizik as their replacement for Tommy Tuberville. Yep, the same Gene Chizik who went 5-19 in two seasons at Iowa State....

T.O. Scolds Media, Ed Werder Following Spanking Of Giants. Let's Watch The Fun
Here's Terrell Owens doing what he does best, denying controversy that he's supposed to have started. In this case, the jaunty jalopy cap adds a special air of believability, wouldn't you say?...

We Call This One 'Tony Romo's Identity Crisis'
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....