f Page 1016 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Florida Grandma Uses Her Softball Skills To Bash Half-Naked Burglar's Head With Bat
A would-be burglar is in jail in Florida, with a gash on his head, after a 65-year-old slugger named Clarese Gainey whacked him on the dome with a baseball bat when he tried to break into her car early Sunday morning. WMC Action News 5 had the story:...

Is This The End For Joe Thornton And The Sharks As We Know Them?
The San Jose Sharks have been reduced in their time to being the NHL’s glorified version of the Portland Trail Blazers—almost always in the playoffs, always ultimately being on the business end of a handshake line. It’s almost a zen koan at this point; when unrequited love turns to “Call us when you...

The Good Part Of The NBA Season Has Started
It is a curious folkway here at Deadspin that NBA-related previews cannot be published before the start of whatever it is they’re previewing. It’s not covered during the onboarding process, and is more just one of those things that you learn over the course of time as a member of the staff, like the...

One Last Opening Day At A Dying Minor League Ballpark
WOODBRIDGE, Virginia — None of the elite members of the Washington, D.C. sporting press were on hand at Pfitzner Stadium to witness the home opener of the Class-A Advanced Potomac Nationals. It was probably for the best....

Let Us Hope Jayson Tatum Has Won His Long Battle Against Kobe Brain
Celtics star Jayson Tatum scored 26 points on 11-of-20 shooting during last night’s Game 2 victory over the Pacers. He was very good, but the best play he made, and the one that should have Celtics fans most encouraged moving forward, involved him passing on what could have been a game-deciding dagg...

Jared Dudley Versus Ben Simmons Should Turn Into Some Prime NBA Playoff Beef
In Game 1 against the Sixers, fleshy Nets vet Jared Dudley shone. He finished with two points, but made several nice reads after lumbering into traffic, snagged a steal which led to a charming slow-break before Mike Scott broke it up on aesthetic principle, and, most importantly, played some stout d...

How Russell Wilson's Megadeal Allows NFL Owners To Keep Winning
The conventional wisdom on Russell Wilson’s record-setting contract extension is that it’s a win for both sides. Wilson is now the NFL’s highest-paid player, and he secured strong guarantees, the largest signing bonus in history, and significant early cash flow ......

Dallas Keuchel And Craig Kimbrel Are Haunting The Baseball Season
Before Jason Vargas made his second start of the season on Saturday, beat reporters asked Mets manager Mickey Callaway what he expected from his team’s fifth starter. It was a reasonable question, given how badly Vargas has struggled over this season and the last, but also a difficult one to answer...

Giannis Shamed Former Buck Thon Maker Into Submission, Twice
There’s no real drama left in the ass-whooping better known as the Bucks-Pistons first-round series. Milwaukee is the best team in the East, featuring the likely MVP and a top five offense and defense. Detroit is...not that, plus they’re missing their best player, Blake Griffin, due to injury....

Philipp Grubauer Saved A Game And The Flames Are On The Brink
It’s less sexy than the Blue Jackets clobbering Tampa, but out west the Avalanche are on the verge of upsetting the other top seed, taking a 3-1 series lead over the Flames after a comeback 3-2 overtime win. Colorado’s doing a lot right, but a large share of their success belongs to goalie Philipp G...

Robert Kraft Got A Ban On Authorities Releasing Video Of Him Getting A Hand Job, For Now
A circuit judge in Palm Beach County has given New England Patriots owner Robert Kraft the temporary protective order he requested—preventing law enforcement from releasing copies of videos that, according to police, show the billionaire twice receiving sexual acts at a massage parlor. Circuit Judge...

The Pacers Kept Handing Bojan Bogdanovic The Ball Until It Killed Them
It looked like the Pacers got some much-needed redemption on Wednesday. After putting up a measly eight points in the third quarter against the Celtics in Game 1—Indiana would go on to lose 84-74—the Pacers had a strong third quarter of their own in Game 2, outscoring Boston 29-16. But that momentum...

The NFL Schedule Is Out And Everyone Got Screwed But The Patriots
The NFL officially released the 2019 schedule for all 32 teams on Wednesday, and though the graphic the league used to announce it is an eyesore, there are some great matchups to look forward to. The Saints and Rams get a rematch of last year’s controversial NFC Championship in Week 2. The Patriots ...

AAF Officially Pulls The Plug, Files For Bankruptcy
The Alliance of American Football is officially dead. The league filed for Chapter 7 bankruptcy in Texas’ Eastern District today, as first reported by Front Office Sports. The bankruptcy filing comes two weeks after the league abruptly folded, leaving players on the hook to pay for allegedly team-p...

Sebastian Telfair's Gun Trial Derailed By Sniping Between Wife, Mistress, And Another Woman
Former NBA journeyman point guard Sebastain Telfair, better known for his exploits as a high school phenom, is currently on trial in Brooklyn for a series of gun charges. Telfair was arrested in the summer of 2017 with a huge arsenal of weapons, and proceedings reportedly got off to a rocky start on...

Deadspin Idiot Noisily Eats Cool-Ass Fruits
Here at Deadspin, we are committed to bringing you top quality video content. It’s why when we set out to bring you a video of Giri Nathan eating disparate fruits, we didn’t stop our thinking at “how?” We went further. We broke the thought barrier and asked ourselves, “How loud?”...

Russell Westbrook Is Struggling
The sixth-seeded Oklahoma City Thunder were such a popular pick to upset the third-seeded Portland Trail Blazers in the first round of the NBA Playoffs that it’s hardly fair to even call them the underdogs. Only one of ESPN’s panel of 20 analysts picked the Blazers to take the series, and the thinki...

The Damian Lillard Experience Is The Sweetest Show In Basketball
Tell yourself you love basketball as a beautiful game, to watch the ball ping around the court as a team’s collective hive-mind hunts the best available shot. Then watch the last week of the NBA playoffs and see if you can stick to that conviction. Between Lou Williams’s rash of perverse leaners on ...

A 23-year-old assistant coach and a Cheektowaga (N.Y.) under-18 player have been suspended for a year for their roles in this extremely racist shit at a Jan. 20 game. The player will age out of the youth league but still be banned from any USA Hockey–sanctioned league. The coach says he feels like h...

Vote In The Name Of The Year Sweet Sixteen
With plenty of real estate remaining in 2019, it’s masochistic to imagine what next year could look like. Emperor Trump? World Series champion Mariners? The mind reels! But whatever horrors might unfold in 2020, we have at least one pop culture stalwart to soothe ourselves in the post-Game of Throne...