f Page 1668 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Ex-NFLer Sues NFL Retirement Plan For Denying Him Disability Benefits
A former NFL player is suing the league’s retirement plan saying it repeatedly denied his requests for increased disability despite ample evidence of his inability to work due to neck injuries suffered while playing. Among the allegations outlined in the lawsuit is that key to Charles Dimry’s denial...
Burkina Faso’s National Team Is Playing For Liberty (And Money)
Burkina Faso hosts Uganda tomorrow at Ouagadougou’s Stade du 4 Août 1983, with qualification for the 2017 Africa Cup of Nations on the line. For members and staff of Les Étalons, though, the match represents more than just the next step in the march toward Gabon....
Adam Morrison Is Prepared For The Apocalypse. Are You?
Some say the world will end in fire, some say in ice, but when it does end it’ll be survived by an unathletic shooter with a single ACL and an underground cache of insulin....
Cute And Good Puppy On The Field Gets Whisked Away Like A Little Baby
Capivariano FC beat Oeste 2-1 on Wednesday in some hot Campeonato Paulista action down in Brazil, but I don’t care about that and you don’t care about. What I care about and what you presumably will care about is this here furry Idiot On The Field. A Capivirano player was eventually able to befriend...
Hallelujah, A College Football Coach Has A Sensible Position On Transfers
There is a litany of asinine and unfair NCAA rules, but perhaps the most blatantly unfair are the transfer rules. With limited exceptions, college athletes playing football, basketball, baseball, and men’s hockey must sit out a year of competition when they transfer schools. Even more onerous, coach...
Steve Francis Needs A Company To Ship One Of His Boats
Attention: Steve Francis, former star point guard for the University of Maryland and the Houston Rockets and not-star point guard for the New York Knicks, needs one of his boats moved from Sarasota, Fla. to “the Harbor.” (Presumably, if you’re the sort of person who can get a boat moved out of Saras...
What Chair Has Been Farted In The Most?
Chairs! They’re soft and comfortable and they provide the perfect acoustic backdrop for a good, solid round of farting. But what chair has been farted in the most over time? Can you even NAME a famous chair without cheating? Is an uninformed discussion about chair farts worth your time at all? THAT ...
Peeps Are The Worst Seasonal Candy
Easter is upon us. You know this—even if you don’t have a grandmother sending increasingly frantic texts asking what time you’ll be there for dinner on Sunday—because the commercials have all gone pastel and there are goddamn Peeps everywhere. If you don’t care about the religious significance, East...
There Are Actual Cubs At Cubs Camp
Joe Maddon likes to make spring training fun. On Tuesday it was mimes. Today it’s baby bears....
Should You Upgrade Your Gym?
You’re not working out enough, and like any mature, self-aware person, you suspect it’s your gym’s fault, not your own. So you start browsing other options, but you’re also reluctant to shell out more cash. Though the employees pitching you on a shiny new gym will be trying to sell you a new “lifest...
Oh, This'll Really Reassure People That The Browns Have Turned Things Around
Robert Griffin III is a Brown. (As he was, on some level, always destined to be.) The Browns’ football people, especially head coach Hue Jackson, apparently loved what they saw from Griffin in a workout last week. A workout that was attended by shitbag owner Jimmy Haslam. We now learn, from this NFL...
This Is One Dumb Technical Foul
Refs blew it twice in one play tonight as Maryland’s Jake Layman wasn’t whistled for a double dribble on his first-half dunk against Kansas, but earned a technical foul for hanging on the rim. There’s a good reason Layman didn’t immediately let go after the straight-on two-handed dunk, and the techn...
<i>Grand Theft Auto</i> Is Currently Playing Out Live Near Phoenix [UPDATE]
Here’s a gent leading cops on a police chase who can be seen hopping out of his truck, attacking a dude on a motorcycle, failing to abscond with said motorcycle, and then getting back in his truck and speeding away. You can keep up with the chase here, at KNXV....
This Dumb Keeper Is Soccer's New Trickster God
Just look at this idiot. Maritzburg United goalkeeper Glenn Verbauwhede, of the South African Premier Soccer League, has developed an incredibly crazy strategy of baiting referees into giving opponents fouls. First, he lures opposing players into his personal space, then intentionally lunges at thei...
French And British Sailors Face Off In Rugby Match, Punch The Crap Out Of Each Other
A recent rugby match between the French Navy and British Navy devolved into a punchin’ match, because if there’s one thing sailors and rugby guys like to do, it’s punch....
James Rodríguez Is Out To Prove He's Still The Shit
Nobody in Madrid much likes Colombian superstar James Rodríguez. His teammates don’t like him, his coach doesn’t like him, the fans don’t like him, the president doesn’t like him, even the local cops don’t like him. At a career crossroad of sorts, with his talent unquestioned but his dedication and ...
Butter Crocks Are A Crock Of Bullshit
Butter is practically perfect in just about any form. Anyone with tastebuds knows this. But if, like many Americans, you’re storing your butter in the refrigerator, you’re screwing up. And if you buy a $25 trinket in which to store your room-temperature butter, you’re screwing up even worse....
Canadian Junior Hockey Players Brawl For Extremely Canadian Reason
Here we have two junior hockey teams—the Flin Flon Bombers in white, and the Weyburn Red Wings in red—getting into a postgame brawl because one of the Red Wings players tried to make off with a severed moose leg that was tossed onto the ice by Bombers fans. A moose leg!...
I'm Getting Married, And I Don't Know What My Name Will Be
Shortly after I got engaged a coworker told me a story about a friend of his. Or maybe it was a friend of a friend, or a cousin, or an allegory. Point is, there was this lady and she was marrying a man with the same last name as hers. While it’s somewhat common and even encouraged in other cultures,...