f Page 959 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Barcelona, Real Madrid, And PSG Are In A Three-Way Standoff Over Neymar's Future
The first Clásico of the season isn’t until the end of October, but Real Madrid and Barcelona are currently in the throes of a battle with much higher stakes than any one match. After a summer’s worth of rumors and reports linking Paris Saint-Germain’s star forward Neymar to a return to Barcelona, R...

Serena Williams And Maria Sharapova Will Toss The Beef Back On The Grill At The U.S. Open
Will the first-round U.S. Open meeting between Serena Williams and Maria Sharapova be a good match in terms of play quality? Probably not. Does it promise rich entertainment value anyway? Hell yes....

Meet "The Fridge," Who Is Like "The Freeze" But Larger And More Cunning
Everyone loves “The Freeze,” the masked sprinter who makes a living humiliating amateur athletes at Braves games, but there is a similar hero plying his trade at Gwinnett Stripers games, and he is quite the specimen....
![Patriots' Patrick Chung Indicted On Cocaine Possession Charge In New Hampshire [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/mqgj1noutu5u8qqpigye.jpg)
Patriots' Patrick Chung Indicted On Cocaine Possession Charge In New Hampshire [Update]
New England Patriots safety Patrick Chung might have to make a trip to New Hampshire next Wednesday, as he’s slated to be arraigned on a charge of cocaine possession stemming from June 25....

Why Your Team Sucks 2019: Chicago Bears
Some people are fans of the Chicago Bears. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Chicago Bears. This 2019 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. Read all the previews so far here....

Foul Ball Immediately Becomes Child's Most Prized Possession
Yes, yes, we’ve all seen various versions of a video showing a baseball fan grabbing a foul ball in a way that is funny or charming. But have you ever seen a young baseball fan get his hands on a foul ball and respond like he just gained possession of the One Ring?...

Carlos Vela Crumples Up San Jose Earthquakes, Drops Them In Waste Basket, Pees In Waste Basket, Hurls Waste Basket Into Volcano
Carlos Vela is MLS’s top goal scorer this season, and is tied for second in assists, and a person doesn’t get to those positions in a professional league without being either a FIFA 19 creation or just comprehensively superior to 99 percent of the other people in the league. The numbers tell the lat...

How Early Is Too Early To Be Nervous About Mitch Marner?
Everything is fine in Toronto, because training camp doesn’t even start for another few weeks. But ... is it really? The negotiations between the Maple Leafs and their wunderkind RFA winger Mitch Marner have, perhaps unsurprisingly, plodded through the offseason with minimal progress, or at least wi...

Dog Racing Died Without A Funeral
SARASOTA, FLORIDA — The sun hadn’t yet risen over the Sarasota Kennel Club, and Deb Linn was wrist deep in 100 pounds of bloody meat. She had been been up since 4:30 a.m., when she made the 45-minute commute south from Ellenton, a small town where the rent is more affordable than in the wealthy beac...

CNN Wonders If Smartphones Are Why The Tennis Youth Can't Beat Roger Federer
An article over at CNN today formally advances a claim dropped casually by commentators, coaches, fans, and any crank with a taste for caricaturing a whole generation. Here goes: Smartphones are hampering tennis’s young players, which is why they can’t stop the Big Three in the men’s game, who enjo...

The New XFL Team Names And Logos Are Something Worse Than Bad
The second, flaghumpinger incarnation of the XFL is, it appears, truly actually happening next spring. Landry Jones is in and the league has real teams and everything! Unfortunately, these are those teams....

Why Your Team Sucks 2019: Houston Texans
Some people are fans of the Houston Texans. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Houston Texans. This 2019 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. Read all the previews so far here....

Manager Ascends To New Level Of Consciousness, Makes Completely Logical Connection Between The Handball Rule And Brexit
The modern discourse is a never-ending cascade of Expanding Brain memes. Everyone plays their part, and when Deadspin is doing its job well, we provide takes that belong to one of the latter panels, ones hopefully more sophisticated than this but less out-there than this. Proving that our angle on t...

The Antonio Brown Helmet Saga Ends With A Wet Thud
I suppose the only way the Antonio Brown Body Issue could wrap up was with him turning into a penitent and eager company man. He fought the law, the law yawned, took its feet off the desk, mixed itself a drink and hammered him flat, and he went “all-in” on being an Oakland Raider by playing Jon Grud...

Idiot Squirrel On The Field Successfully Invades Consecutive Twins Games
For the second night in a row, a daring squirrel has invaded the field at the Twins’ stadium. Monday night the furry fellow invaded the home dugout and sent several players fleeing in terror. Tuesday night our intrepid rodent pal bolted down the first baseline, nutmegged a baserunner, briefly leapt ...

Brian Flores Loads Practice Playlist With Jay-Z Tracks One Day After Kenny Stills Criticizes NFL's Roc Nation Partnership
Dolphins head coach Brian Flores and wide receiver Kenny Stills have not been on the same page when it comes to Stills speaking out about systemic racism. A couple weeks back, Flores delivered a weak-sauce admonishment when Stills criticized owner Stephen Ross’s hefty support of Donald Trump’s reele...

Jerry Jones Asserts His Right To Be A Dickweed About Ezekiel Elliott
Jerry and Stephen Jones held a press conference Tuesday with Cowboys linebacker Jaylon Smith, who just signed a hefty five-year extension with the team. Smith’s successful negotiations stand in stark contrast to those of wide receiver Amari Cooper, quarterback Dak Prescott, and running back Ezekiel ...

By Banning Protest Signs, MLS Is Trying To Lobotomize The Fandom It Asked For
MLS and its clubs are currently embroiled in a fight against their own supporters over what the league claims are violations of its anti-politics rules. Over the last two weeks, multiple fans in multiple stadiums have been ejected for banners that run afoul of the league’s Fan Code of Conduct. There...

Ronda Rousey Fucked Up Her Finger While She Filmed A TV Show
Let’s issue the warning up front: You’re going to see a pretty gross finger if you keep reading. It looks like a bloody lowercase “Z,” if that helps you sharpen your imagination. Okay, you’ve been warned....

HelmetWatch: Jon Gruden Says Antonio Brown Practiced In An NFL-Certified Helmet Today
Antonio Brown’s long struggle with the NFL and the Raiders for the right to wear whatever old helmet he most desires may have reached a ceasefire on Tuesday. The brand-new Oakland wideout practiced with the team in an NFL-approved helmet for the first time since he went AWOL a couple of days ago, ac...