f Page 995 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Raptors Fight Off Every Warriors Push To Grab A Comfortable Game 1 Victory
In retrospect, we had a pretty solid indication that things were turning Toronto’s way in the build up to their Game 1 victory over the Warriors:...
Drake Tries Very Hard To Pretend He Doesn't Have Steph Curry And Kevin Durant's Jersey Numbers Tattooed On His Body
The world was very nearly spared a couple week’s worth of energetic Drake sightings Thursday night, when Andre Iguodala of the Golden State Warriors went careening into the sidelines late in the first half of Game 1 of the NBA Finals. Iguodala missed hurling the bulk of his giant NBA frame into the ...
What Happened To All The Interesting Refs?
One of the nerdier things a basketball fan can do at 9 a.m. Eastern Weirdo Time is to go to the NBA website and glom onto the identities of the officials who will work whatever game interests you True, NBA ref nerddom is an exceedingly small subset of Nerdvania, but let a thousand sets of hipster gl...
A Thorough And Informative 2019 NBA Finals Preview For Basketball Idiots
Hello, casual basketball viewer! At long last, the NBA Finals are here, and you know what that means: It’s time once again for you to crib a pitiful smattering of hoops knowledge from this extremely half-assed blog and carry it forth to the sports bar like the torch that lights your path....
England's FA Hopes Internet Shaming Will Prevent The Lads From Acting Like Absolute Knobs
The most recent instance of English lads descending on the Iberian peninsula for a soccer match ended up making international news after a Brit shoved an old man into a fountain. So it makes sense that England’s Football Association would want to stop any such debacle in its tracks as the Three Lio...
Let's Talk Ourselves Into This NBA Finals Matchup
The NBA Finals would seem great to someone who only recently decided to care about NBA basketball. You’ve got your dynastic bulletproof Golden State Warriors, currently minus injured cornball virtuoso Kevin Durant but otherwise as monstrously dominant as ever. You’ve also got the Toronto Raptors, a ...
Hear Me Out: Infinite-Field Baseball Games
A few weeks ago, I was reading this interview with architectural critic Paul Goldberger about baseball stadiums in America when I stumbled upon a reminder from Goldberger that doubles as a breathtaking conversation piece for stoners all across the land:...
The Scummy Bucs Tried To Keep Secret Their Failed Attempt To Get Millions From The BP Oil Spill Settlement
This is old, but so what. The more we can talk about how the Tampa Bay Buccaneers cooked their books in a failed attempt to claim settlement money from a far-off oil spill that didn’t actually affect them, the better. Turns out there’s one more twist to pass along: The Bucs sought to keep from publi...
Drake And The Raptors Both Got A Talking-To From The NBA
The Toronto Raptors will host Game 1 of the NBA Finals tonight, and there’s no doubt Drake will be sitting on the sideline. He’s behaved like an unruly dingus courtside in Toronto, blurring the lines between participant and bystander in ways that would make Spike Lee blush. Bucks coach Mike Budenhol...
Oskar Sundqvist Will Face Hearing For Hit That Hospitalized Matt Grzelcyk
Bruins defenseman Matt Grzelcyk was taken to the hospital after being boarded by Oskar Sundqvist in the first period of Wednesday’s 3-2 Blues overtime win. Sundqvist got just two minutes, but a bunch more might be coming: Sundqvist has a hearing with the NHL’s Department of Player Safety. ...
Spanish Soccer Team Celebrates Promotion With Awkward Postgame Strip Tease
With their season-capping win on Saturday, soccer club Esportiu Llançà won promotion from Catalonia’s third division (Spain’s seventh tier overall) to its second. To celebrate the team going up, one of the club’s board members arranged for a stripper to enter the locker room after the game and drop ...
Vladimir Tarasenko Nearly Ripped Himself In Half Scoring This Goal
Carl Gunnarsson’s rocket of a winner for St. Louis in Game 2 last night understandably gets all the love and applause this morning —it gave the Blues their first-ever Stanley Cup Final win and sent them back home with hope instead of despair. But back in the first period, long before Gunnarsson’s go...
Carl Gunnarsson's Pissing Prediction Led To A Boston Pee Party
“Tonight it was hard, so I’m happy about that,” Oskar Sundqvist said, and he was talking about a shot, thank goodness. Specifically, teammate Carl Gunnarsson’s OT goal to give the Blues a 3-2 win and knot up the Stanley Cup Final at a game apiece....
Is This Abandoned Beer Or Fresh Piss?
ESPN hockey analyst Greg Wyshynski was on-hand for St. Louis’s stirring 3–2 overtime win over the dreaded Bruins in Game 2 of the Stanley Cup Final Wednesday night. Afterward, Wyshynski shot the following Blair Witch-style blurry video of two completely full cups of what he described as beer, tucked...
Carl Gunnarsson's Blue-Line Blast Gives The Blues Their First-Ever Stanley Cup Final Win
Folks, we got a series! After getting absolutely trounced in the final 39 minutes of Game 1, the St. Louis Blues showed that this Stanley Cup Final would not be a repeat of 1970. Rather than allow themselves to get steamrolled by the Bruins in Game 2, the Blues held their ground and beat Boston in o...
Report: The Clippers Remain The Most Desperate Suitor In The Kawhi Leonard Sweepstakes
In keeping with his longstanding policy of having absolutely nothing interesting to say about anything, ever, Kawhi Leonard has offered very little indication of where he might prefer to sign his next long-term contract, following the conclusion of these playoffs. There’s been talk of Kawhi preferri...
![Foul Ball Appears To Injure Young Child At Cubs-Astros Game [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/gr3zks0quc0fkbpdes6q.png)
Foul Ball Appears To Injure Young Child At Cubs-Astros Game [Update]
During the fourth inning of tonight’s Cubs-Astros game, Chicago outfielder Albert Almora Jr. hit a foul ball into the seats on the third base side of the Houston ballpark. According to those present at the game, that ball hit a small child, who was quickly brought up the stairs by an adult....
Degenerate Gambler Charged With Making Racist Death Threats To Dozens Of Athletes
Addison Choi, a 23-year-old ex-college-soccer player from Fullerton, Calif., was charged today in Massachusetts federal court on one count of transmitting a threat to injure a person, after he sent death threats to at least 45 professional and college athletes between July and December 2017. Accord...
Deserve's Got Nothing To Do With It When Adults Lose Their Minds Over A Foul Ball
Foul ball and dinger retrieval rights shouldn’t necessarily be decided by merit. The most qualified person in a given section to score a game ball is generally going to be an adult with a baseball glove and a disconcertingly high threshold for self-humiliation. By contrast, the least qualified perso...
Here's A Fun Activity To Do While Your Team Doesn't Sign Dallas Keuchel Or Craig Kimbrel
When Sunday, June 2, turns to Monday, June 3, the 30 Major League Baseball teams that declined to sign 2015 American League Cy Young Award winner Dallas Keuchel and seven-time All-Star closer Craig Kimbrel as free agents last winter will simultaneously lose their last and best remaining excuse for n...