family - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
How To Keep The Family Together On A Long Distance Move
People are meant to move. We’ve been doing it for tens of thousands of years. Chasing mammoths across the tundra, chasing shiny pebbles down frigid mountain streams, chasing native people out of their homelands. Somewhere in all that traveling we learned to grow plants in rows and gather cattle into...
What Will Trumpcare Mean For My Disabled Brother?
My older brother Sean has cerebral palsy. He also listens to bebop and enjoys teaching our nephew Oliver about the virtues of counting from one to ten in the voice of The Count and was angered when the Bruins fired Claude Julien. He makes a pot of coffee each morning when he wakes up, reads his news...
Aaron Rodgers's Dad Confirms They Are Not On Speaking Terms<em></em>
In a New York Times story published ahead of today’s Packers-Cowboys NFC Divisional playoff game, Aaron Rodgers’s father confirms he and his son are not on speaking terms, and appears to blame the rift on Rodgers’s fame....
How To Talk To Your Shithead Liberal Nephew Over The Holidays<em></em>
Congratulations! You won the election. Not you, specifically—unless you’re reading this, Mr. Trump, which, now that your name is in it, you probably are—but your people: Real American Men, where “real” means over 45 and white, “American” means suburban- or rural-residing, and “men” means what it use...
What You're Doing When You Call My Brother "Retarded"
I have never been a violent person, at least not instinctively. Whenever I was teased as a child—I struggled to read for much of elementary school and wore a lot of white jeans, so I was teased a lot—I’d opt for silence or a quick joke, usually at my own expense. I’d level my aggressor with my appar...
Finland's Brilliant Baby Boxes Are Finally Coming To Countries That Need Them, Like Ours
Having a new baby sounds, to put it lightly, terrifying. I imagine this is especially true at first, when particularly helpless infants are sent home with necessarily inexperienced parents. Baby-wise friends and family members can help, but it’s still pretty dangerous to put a total neophyte—like yo...
I'm Getting Married, And I Don't Know What My Name Will Be
Shortly after I got engaged a coworker told me a story about a friend of his. Or maybe it was a friend of a friend, or a cousin, or an allegory. Point is, there was this lady and she was marrying a man with the same last name as hers. While it’s somewhat common and even encouraged in other cultures,...
Fancy Toothpicks Are My Cleanest Vice
The summer I was nine, I learned how to brush my teeth with a twig. My grandpa handed me a small piece broken off what’s called a neem tree, and told me to chew on it. I was hit by a very vegetal bitterness, the kind that puckers your mouth by sheer force of personality, crowding out all the other f...
The Only Valentine's Day Message I Need
This Sunday morning, as I do on every Valentine’s Day, I will wake up to a message from my mother. Last year, it was a long email sent at an ungodly early hour, carrying all of her usual, heartfelt, holiday-appropriate sentiments: “Today is not only about boyfriends/girlfriends or husbands/wives but...
How To Tell Your Folks You're Not Coming Home For The Holidays
No matter how old you get, there’s some news that’s hard to break to your parents. Nobody ever wants to trigger another “we’re not mad, we’re just disappointed” situation. The holidays especially hold a lot of emotional weight, so making plans can get complicated, especially when you’ve got ... othe...
The Gambling Cop Who Outshined Basketball Royalty
Editors’ note: On initial publication, this post consisted of a reprint of Pete Axthelm’s 1967 Sports Illustrated story “When The Real McGuire Stood Up.” After publication, we were made aware that a permission given by Axthelm’s family to reprint his work did not extend to this article, as we had mi...
Jim Tomsula's Life Has Been Extraordinarily Depressing
You know Jim Tomsula. You just do. He’s the guy with life lessons to impart to you from his time as a Fuller Brush salesman, opinions on what makes a particular highway overpass a good sleeping one, recommendations on how to cook with Sterno, and reasons why you should shop at the dented-can store, ...