fast-food - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Fast-Food Smackdown: McDonald's Mozzarella Sticks Vs. Wendy's Bacon Fondue Fries
Cheese trails only corgis and dead British men as a stimulator of exaggerated public devotion. Forgetting for a blessed second the “lactose intolerant” cowards who try to hide dime-store haterism behind their genetics and intestines, we all stand ever ready to declare undying love for good old thick...
Chicken Nugget Smackdown: Wendy's vs. Burger King vs. McDonald's
Little kids can be cool, but there are a lot of obvious arguments against parenthood. Children are demonstrably shouty, snotty, and wobbly, and they are rumored to be very expensive to maintain. It has also been widely reported that children have poor taste in television. These are among the reasons...
Burger King's Halloween Whopper Plays Trick-Or-Treat With Your Tongue, Butt
By now you’ve surely heard that ingestion of Burger King’s new Halloween Whopper could lead to a curious and colorful gastrointestinal endgame. I have nothing to add to this lively public discussion, toilet-wise, other than to suggest that if you are either excited or repulsed by this development, y...
Pulled Pork Smackdown: Subway Vs. Wendy's
During the first several decades of our glorious and persistent fast-food era, America’s low-end, high-speed restaurateurs relied almost exclusively on the cow for protein. And why not? Beef tastes good, and cows are huge, plentiful, and otherwise useless (except the cheese cows, those are cool). Bu...
Taco Bell's Dare Devil Loaded Grillers Are Brilliant And Gross, As Usual
Taco Bell is one of the few old-style American fast-food chains still thriving in a reshaped marketplace that increasingly rewards freshness, quality, and nutrition—or at least the perceptions thereof—rather than simply the thrift, speed, and suspect beef upon which the industry was built. The faux-...
![Good News, Siberians: Now You May Have A Happy Meal [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/1402969664089828522.png)
Good News, Siberians: Now You May Have A Happy Meal [Update]
Editor’s Note: As several keen-eyed readers have pointed out, the Siberian Times source article for this post is from 2013. D’oh. Still a pretty funny image....
Pizza Hut's Hot Dog Pizza Isn't Quite Gross Enough
In this strange age of pizza shaming, when Pizzeria Uno has rebranded as Uno’s Chicago Grill, California Pizza Kitchen is deemphasizing flatbread in favor of tequila and quinoa, Domino’s is hawking cheesesteaks, and even Papa Goddamn John is hard-selling chicken poppers, Pizza Hut is staying true to...
Fast-Food Guac-Off: Subway Versus Dunkin' Donuts
Sauces and adjectives are the coagulated lifeblood of fast-food “innovation,” because it’s relatively cheap and easy to spike ranch dressing with cayenne dust, refer to the resulting substance as Kickin’, and splort it onto a chicken patty. It’s a slimy move, but what do you expect them to do? Impro...
List of Kale Items Made With Kale On New McDonald's Menu (With Kale)
The hippies over at Mother Jones magazine drew our attention to how McDonald's "can't decide whether to troll hipsters or embrace them," so while we all figure out which side of the coin ingesting kale falls on, we're wondering about the new McMenu....
Smackdown! Burger King's Yumbo Vs. The Wendy's Bacon Portabella Burger
Hey, great news: Maybe we're not all going to die young from discount-beef-induced cardiac arrest, after all! Traditional fast-food sales are in decline, and the (admittedly gigantic) remaining customer base is starting to gravitate ever so slightly toward the less-bad-for-you options....
Bad Man Employs A Damn McChicken Sandwich As A Tool Of Spousal Abuse
A Des Moines man is in jail today, after he assaulted his pregnant wife with a goddamn McChicken sandwich. And not by feeding it to her! By throwing it at her and smashing it into her face. That's way worse!...
Chick-Fil-A Is Either On A Homicidal Rampage Or Bad At Twitter
So either a Chick-Fil-A employee forgot to log out of the company Twitter account before tweeting about his/her gaming exploits, or the pious chicken chain has snapped and is out here cruising the streets with a weapon, looking for blood, and super chipper about it....