ff Page 515 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Jay Cutler And Kristin Cavallari Are Returning The Wedding Gifts You Sent Them, With Dainty Notes In Some Cases
Previously, we brought you the story of some Deadspin readers who bought gifts for Jay Cutler and Kristin Cavallari off their wedding registry. Then we told you that the Bears QB dumped Cavallari. Here comes the fallout, courtesy of Crate & Barrel....

Behold: This Skymall Ad Is The Only Thing That Still Believes In Jeff Francoeur
Your morning roundup for July 31, the day we realized we would never eat again. See anything that might interest us? Email the tips line. Skymall ad via Alan....

A Belated Farewell To Jeff Carter And Mike Richards: The Legion Of Poon
Thanks to a report from Philadelphia Daily News's intrepid Mighty Dan Gross on Monday, two former Flyers are being torched for their excessive nightlife adventures when they were both members of the team. The implication is, subtly, that their reluctance to curb their Jäger-bombing escapades through...

BREAKING: Hall Of Famer, Admitted T-Shirt Thief Roberto Alomar Will Return The T-Shirt He Stole
Perhaps you read our story earlier today, of Blue Jays fans Fiyaz Kanji and Owais Farooqui, who made the pilgrimage to Cooperstown this weekend to see Roberto Alomar enter the Hall. But during the parade, Alomar took the $50 t-shirt that belonged to Kanji....

Jeff Saturday On Hugging It Out
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Colts and Patriots, sitting in a tree....

Roberto Alomar: Hall Of Famer, T-Shirt Thief
Fiyaz Kanji and Owais Farooqui no longer live in Toronto, where they grew up, but they remain Blue Jays fans nonetheless. So much so, they made the trip to Cooperstown from Boston over the weekend to see Roberto Alomar's enshrinement as the team's first Hall of Famer. But they still can't believe ...

Marv Levy Says His Novel About A Bunch Of Rigged Super Bowls Is Totally Fictional, OK?
Former Buffalo Bills coach Marv Levy has written a forthcoming novel, presumably to ride the sinusoidal arc of American letters back upward....

Why Some Writers Won't Vote Derek Jeter To The Hall Of Fame
Sam Borden's got a column on SI.com today, idly wondering if Jeter will become the first player in history to be unanimously elected to the Baseball Hall of Fame. It's a question that shouldn't matter because HOF voting is so flaky — Tom Seaver has the highest percentage of any electee — but it does...

Onetime Mets Draft Pick Dies From Spider Bites
Jeff Seale, who was taken in the second round of the 1988 draft by the Mets (but never played pro ball), died on Sunday two weeks after being bitten 19 times by a Black Widow spider. His friends say they'll remember him for his pranks as much as his mid-90s fastball. [H/T Dan]...

If You're An NFL QB, And You Post Your Wedding Registry Online, A Deadspin Reader Might Send You Shot Glasses
What magic this Internet has given us. Among this magic: online wedding registries for NFL quarterbacks, including Jeff Garcia, Alex Smith, and Tony Romo. Because it just has to mean something that Romo needs a cupcake carrier for his new, committed life....

The NFL Lockout's Almost Over, So Here's Stevie Johnson's Big Ass Birthday Cake
[via Flopping Out]...

They're Making A Full-Body Wax Casting Of Bernard Hopkins For Display In An "Odditorium"
Hot off the presses from Bernard Hopkins's press folks and the good people from Ripley's Believe It Or Not is word that the boxer has committed to a two-day appearance in the F/X department at Ripley's world headquarters in Orlando. There, on Monday and Tuesday, he will "begin the tedious task of h...

BBC Mistakenly Confuses Media Gadfly For Baseball Expert, Substantial Awkwardness Ensues
Ben Walker writes about baseball for the Associated Press—you'll see his byline, or, perhaps, his words fairly often. Michael Wolff is not Ben Walker. Wolff is a media writer for Vanity Fair, which would never have heard of baseball were Michael Lewis not on its masthead....

Despite Jeff Novitzky's Life's Work, Cheating At Sports Is Still Not A Crime
Jeff Novitzki was an IRS agent. Not an avenging angel sent from above, nor an earthly crusader for all that is good and pure in America, but a bureaucrat. Somewhere along the way he got it into his mind that it was his job and his job alone (and his only job) to eradicate the peril of steroids in sp...

And Here's How The Clemens Case Might Did End In A Mistrial On Day Two (UPDATE: Mistrial!)
The NY Daily News is all over this one, as things change by the minute. ...

Weak Grounder To Second Starts Nutso Minor League Brawl
Your gladiators: the Spokane Indians and Vancouver Canadian, Class A affiliates of the Rangers and Blue Jays respectively. Your catalyst: I dunno, probably someone saying something about someone's momma....

Derek Jeter, Josh Hamilton, The Dodgers And Cliff Lee All Had Shining Moments Yesterday
Your morning roundup for July 10, the day it pays to be wary of people with wide faces....

Exclusive: We've Obtained Audited Financials For The NFL League Office
These are audited financial statements for the NFL's league office, the nerve center of professional football, covering the years ended March 31, 2009, and March 31, 2010. The documents below deal with only one piece of NFL operations, and there aren't any obviously mind-melting revelations about th...

Today In Depressing Lockout Non-Stories: "Clippers Season Tix Same Price"
The NBA lockout isn't even a week old yet, and we're plum out of stories. The NBA's website has become a ghost-town-cum-clearinghouse for WNBA news and classic highlights. We're talking about predictable Michael Beasley weed busts instead of flurrying free agent activity, or something....

Stories That Don't Suck: SportsFeat's Guide To Schmuck Owners
Every Friday, SportsFeat picks a few great weekend reads for Deadspin. In honor of Frank McCourt, the lockouts, and James Dolan's never-ending flirtation with Isiah Thomas, here are five of the best stories ever written about terrible owners....