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The Deranged True Story Of <i>Heavy Metal Parking Lot</i>, The <i>Citizen Kane</i> Of Wasted Teenage Metalness
Suburban dirtballs of the 1980s are a lost culture, worthy of academic study, that disappeared abruptly, leaving mysterious artifacts for future generations to work over. Think of them as, say, the ancient Mayans, only with mullets....

If The Oscars Nominated Good Movies, They Wouldn't Be The Oscars
For 363 days a year, nobody gives a fuck about the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences. Today is one of the two remaining days, when suckers care—and other suckers pretend to care—about who gets nominated for the Oscars, which are worthless trash and always have been....

Q&A: Comedy Legend Barry Crimmins, Star Of The New Doc <i>Call Me Lucky</i>
Bobcat Goldthwait’s career as a director (Shakes the Clown, God Bless America, World’s Greatest Dad) continues to reduce our memory of him as a comedian and actor (Police Academy 2: Their First Assignment, Police Academy 3: Back in Training, Police Academy 4: Citizens on Patrol). His latest film, Ca...

Here's What I Learned Watching FIFA's Incredible Propaganda Movie
Recently, soccer fans all over the world were impressed to learn that United Passions, a FIFA-financed movie about how wonderful FIFA is starring Gérard Depardieu, Sam Neill, and Tim Roth, had pulled in $200,000 at the box office since it premiered at Cannes in May. This sum may be a bit less than t...

Georgia WR Chris Conley Made A <em>Star Wars</em> Fan Film And It's Great
Georgia WR Chris Conley is an unabashed Star Wars geek. What started as a simple attempt to get some mock lightsaber battles going around campus eventually morphed into this: Retribution, a fan film with some ridiculously good production values....

<em>We Are The Best!</em> Proves That Punk Rock Never Dies
In 1990, two freshwomen at the University of Oregon got fed up with all the boy bands on campus, so they proclaimed themselves to be their own band. After a few months of talking themselves up, they were invited by a friend in Olympia, Washington, to play a Valentine's Day show. There was just one p...

<em>Dredd</em> Is The Second-Best Drug-Fortress Action Flick Ever
For reasons we may never understand, movie studios, in their infinite wisdom, often decide to drop two movies about the same thing at the same time. That's how we end up with dueling volcano-based disaster movies, giant-asteroid-based disaster movies, or Truman Capote biopics. But in 2012, we got su...

SI's Tribeca Film Festival Awards
The good people over at SI's Extra Mustard Blog have put together awards for the best sports movies that screened at this year's Tribeca Film Festival. They've handed out a number of awards, from Ragtag Success Story to Best Fanboy Director. Above, the trailer for Next Goal Wins, a documentary follo...

Dwight Howard Will Voice A Turkey In A Movie About...Turkeys
The film is called Free Birds. Owen Wilson, Amy Poehler and Colm Meaney, who will clearly voice the Asshole Turkey, are in it. Dwight Howard will voice a character named Cold Turkey. Do you get it?...
![Kobe Says Many Lakers Were Surprised When Abe Lincoln Died At The End Of <i>Lincoln</i> [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/187msilmqp218jpg.jpg)
Kobe Says Many Lakers Were Surprised When Abe Lincoln Died At The End Of <i>Lincoln</i> [Update]
Yesterday was an off day in Oklahoma City for the Lakers, so to bring the scuffling 9-10 team together, they had a boys' night out at the theater. On the program: Steven Spielberg's Lincoln. The ancipation led Pau Gasol to offer perhaps the best and most childlike tweet of the season:...

We've Distilled The Most Thrilling Moments From NFL Films' Bill Belichick Documentary For You
The NFL Network will premiere A Football Life this Thursday at 9 p.m. ET. We know you've all been waiting for this ever since 2009, when Belichick became the first person ever wired for an entire season, and so we've gone ahead and put together some of the highlights for you....

Um, Can This In Any Way Be A Good Idea?
Randy "The Ram" Robinson ... er, I mean Mickey Rourke, to participate in WWE's Wrestlemania 25 in Houston on April 5. His opponent? Possibly Chris Jericho. [Access Hollywood]...
