fl Page 549 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Washington Defensive End Jason Hatcher: Referees "Single Us Out" Because Of Team Name
Washington got the shit kicked out of them by Cam Newton and the Panthers today. Newton tossed five touchdowns and generally ran all over everyone. Of course, Washington helped him out plenty, as they committed nine penalties for 68 yards, including a would-be pick-six that got called all the way ba...
Case Keenum Suffers Head Injury, Stays In Game, Gives Up Game-Losing Fumble
Just a few minutes after Joe Flacco tore his ACL, the quarterback opposite him suffered a nasty injury of his own. Case Keenum got rocked here yet nobody made any moves to remove him from the game. Look at his teammate pick him up like he’s a bag of flour. ...
Joe Flacco Will Miss The Rest Of The Season With A Torn ACL
Well shit. Everyone on the Ravens is getting catastrophically injured. Joe Flacco has a torn ACL and will miss the rest of the season. He tore it on the play above but stayed in to finish out the game despite “an enormous amount of pain.”...
Report: NFL Might Not Come To Los Angeles Until 2017
An NFL team moving to Los Angeles next season has felt inevitable for most of the year, but that might not be the case anymore. According to a report from NFL.com’s Ian Rapoport, sources close to negotiations have expressed doubt that a deal to move one-to-three of the Rams, Chargers, and Raiders to...
Justin Forsett Leaves Game With Broken Arm
The Ravens’ terrible season got worse today. Justin Forsett left today’s game in Baltimore against the Rams with a broken right arm that he suffered on this play when Aaron Donald got into the backfield and tossed him down. The Ravens confirmed the diagnosis. Javorius Allen is in at running back for...
Report: Bucs Linebacker Kwon Alexander Could Face PED Suspension
Kwon Alexander, a rookie linebacker for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, will reportedly face a four-game suspension for violating the NFL’s performance-enhancing drug policy, according to the Tampa Tribune. The length of Alexander’s suspension is four games because that’s the mandatory amount of time for ...
The Dipshittiest Of All Dipshit Sports Fans: Today's Guide To Ignoring The NFL
No close examination of the bullcrap NFL would be complete without a look at NFL fans, possibly the dipshittiest of all dipshit sports fans when taken as a whole....
Report: Teams Are Already Lining Up To Bring Peyton Manning Into The Front Office
Peyton Manning has such a comical litany of injuries that it’s amazing he was playing NFL football into 2015. He has a surgically taped-up neck, a problem with his throwing shoulder, maybe-maybe-not broken ribs, a partially torn plantar fascia (apparently, this is worse than a full tear), not to men...
Colin Kaepernick Might Be Done As A 49er
Even before the 49ers put Colin Kaepernick on the IR this morning, it was clear that he was ancillary to the team’s plans going forward. Coach Jim Tomsula benched him in favor of Blaine Gabbert (Blaine Gabbert!) for their Week 9 win over the Falcons before the extent of his shoulder injury was revea...
Ex-NFL RB Michael Bennett Arrested For Alleged Forgery, Elder Abuse
Former NFL running back Michael Bennett was arrested in Petaluma, Ca. on Thursday and held on suspicion of forgery, elder abuse, grand theft, and burglary. Bennett allegedly took out more than $300,000 worth of fraudulent loans in his girlfriend’s parents’ names. The parents realized something fishy...
Jameis Winston Is Threatening To Sue CNN To Prevent Airing Of College Rape Documentary
Sexual assault on college campuses is a major problem, and several high profile cases have brought national attention to the crisis and its accompanying administrative cover ups. Not only is on-campus sexual assault widespread—according to a study, 1 in 4 college women will be a victim of a sexual a...
Local Radio Station Claims Lions Ditched Them Over Censorship Issues
97.1 The Ticket has been the Detroit Lions’ flagship station for 18 years, but the team has decided to ditch The Ticket for another local station. According to a senior vice president of CBS Radio, the owner of 97.1, this decision was made in part because the station refused to allow the Lions to ce...
The Grisly, Goofy <i>Starship Troopers </i>Played Dumb To Make Hollywood Look Even Dumber
The moment when you discover what Starship Troopers is really about is one of the great eureka moments in the life of any young movie dork. I’ve got vivid memories of staggering out of a suburban multiplex in 1997 and sputtering, “What the fuck was that?” To my teenage self, it was basically Saved b...
Aaron Rodgers's Throwing Shoulder Is "Banged Up"
If this doesn’t fully explain Aaron Rodgers’s (relative) struggles this season, it sure goes a hell of a lot further than hypotheticals about his girlfriend. Rodgers appeared on the injury report for the first time this week with an unspecified injury to his right shoulder, and since there was no ob...
I Want To Know Everything About Carson Palmer's Friends Pup, Phil and Sugar Cane
Andre Ellington’s fourth quarter touchdown against Seattle on Sunday sent Arizona quarterback Carson Palmer into a tizzy, pumping his fist and telling the Seahawks crowd to suck it. But after coming in for criticism and with a possible fine looming on the horizon, Palmer says his exulting was direct...
Rex Ryan Has Had It With The New England Media
An unprecedented and frankly offensive thing happened today: a coach was asked questions about the team he’s playing, by reporters who cover that team....
We Have Found The Key To Defeating Aaron Rodgers
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here....