fl Page 562 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Bills Fan Submits His Audition For WWE
Bills fans continue to be America’s greatest source of shameless hijinks. This video comes to us from yesterday’s tailgate, and while it is not nearly as gross as some of the other things Bills fans have been up to, it is still very reckless, and therefore very Bills....

The Bills Can't Stop Taking Penalties
After Buffalo’s Week 2 loss to the Patriots, a game in which the Bills were called for 18 penalties (with 14 accepted for 140 yards), Rex Ryan spoke about the team’s need to get more disciplined. “We want to be the least penalized team in the league,” Ryan said. “That’s kind of a goal we’re shooting...

Clay Matthews Kept Picking On Colin Kaepernick
The photo above was taken during yesterday’s Packers-49ers game, right after Packers linebacker Clay Matthews sacked 49ers quarterback Colin Kaepernick in the third quarter. That’s Matthews stealing Kaepernick’s signature bicep-kiss celebration, which is a pretty good way to troll a quarterback afte...

DeMarco Murray Wants The Damn Ball
Whatever the Eagles’ plan, it’s not working. They’re 1-3 now, smack dab in last place in a weak NFC East after a backbreaking 23-20 loss at Washington. And all along, Chip Kelly has shunted the blame to his players: it’s about “executing,” he’s said since the beginning, not his system. RB DeMarco Mu...

Let Us Now Praise Great Men
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Colts' Senior Citizens' Collective Beats Up On The Jaguars
The last time Matt Hasselbeck started an NFL game, he replaced a hurt Jake Locker in Tennessee in 2012. He wasn’t supposed to see time then, either, already in the “fossilized mentor” stage of his career, which he now occupies in Indianapolis with Andrew Luck. He’s well past his due date, I’m saying...

Ndamukong Suh Can’t Save The Dolphins, Who Suck
Every time the NFL rolls whatever waterlogged Floridian team has been exiled to London in any given year, I wonder how any foreign, casual observer would ever turn convert based on what happens in these games. They’re typically bad, and unwatchably so, but I don’t think anything has been less recogn...

Cops: Priest Pulled Gun On 8-Year-Old Because He Was A Cowboys Fan
Father Kevin Carter of St. Margaret of Cortona in Little Ferry, Nj. was arrested on Friday and charged with one count of fourth degree aggravated assault with a firearm and one count of third degree endangering the welfare of a child for an incident that occurred back on September 13. According to B...

Ex-NFL Star Irving Fryar Sentenced to Five Years In Prison For Mortgage Fraud
Irving Fryar, the first overall pick in the 1984 NFL Draft, was sentenced to five years in prison in a New Jersey courtroom yesterday for a mortgage scam he ran about five years ago. Fryar’s mother Allene McGhee, 74, was also sentenced to three years’ probation....

The Biggest NFL Story Today Is Whether Jim Tomsula Farted At A Press Conference
After a feel-good win against the Vikings in Week 1, the 49ers have reverted to the complete mess we knew they’d be, but ignore that for a minute. Did head coach Jim Tomsula fart during yesterday’s press conference? Listen for yourself:...

Steve Smith Will Beef With You Over Any Old Thing
Steve Smith had to leave last night’s game against the Steelers after taking a hit to the back from Steelers linebacker Lawrence Timmons. Smith was angry about getting hurt, but it wasn’t Timmons’s shot that had him riled up, it was an earlier tackle made by former teammate Mike Mitchell....

What's Wrong With Andrew Luck?
The Colts have tried to downplay whatever’s wrong with Andrew Luck’s health. On Sunday, coach Chuck Pagano said he was OK. On Monday, Luck declared himself “fine.” On Wednesday, Pagano casually read off his injury list—mentioning Luck eighth. For the last two days, Luck has been officially “limited”...

Ronaldinho Can't Play Soccer Anymore, But He Can't Stop
Watching Ronaldinho in his prime—nipping the ball around defenders with moves you’d either never seen someone pull off in real life or at least never, say, against some of the world’s best defenders, in the middle of the sport’s fiercest rivalry, in front of 80,000 opposing fans, with supporters so ...

<i>The Bank Job</i> Is A Great Jason Statham Flick, Even Though He Hardly Kicks Anybody
The Bank Job is a movie that stars Jason Statham, but it’s not a Jason Statham movie. The chief attributes of his persona, as established in a long line of mostly-pretty-great action B-movies (like, say, this one or this one), are just not there. We don’t get the cold-eyed and square-jawed stare, or...

The NFL Went A Calendar Month Without An Arrest For The First Time Since 2009
October is here, which means decorative gourd season, motherfuckers, and the emergence of Mr. Autumn Man, and also a minor milestone for football: Congratulations to each and every NFL player for not getting arrested in September. ...

Josh Scobee Needs A Hug
I wouldn’t wish the life of a kicker on anyone. For the most part, no one notices you until you fuck up. Oh hey: Josh Scobee....

The Steelers Faced Four Important 4th Downs And Blew Them All
We’ve written a couple of times about the Steelers’ penchant for going for two instead of kicking PATs this year, and Thursday night’s game against the Ravens presented a few new wrinkles for the “kick it or go for it” decision matrix. There was a lot going on in this game, but the most interesting ...

It Doesn't Sound Like Flip Saunders's Fight Against Cancer Is Going Well
In August the Timberwolves announced that head coach/president of basketball operations Flip Saunders had been diagnosed with Hodgkin’s lymphoma, but planned to continue coaching. After he suffered a setback that plan became unworkable, and three weeks ago Saunders took a leave of absence from the t...

Reports: Warren Sapp Pleads Guilty In Domestic Violence Case
Warren Sapp pleaded guilty today to one count of domestic violence in Las Vegas, according to TMZ and the Las Vegas Review-Journal. Sapp originally was charged with three counts, but prosecutors dropped two of them in exchange for today’s plea deal, according to the reports....

I Tried Daily Fantasy Sports And It Is Evil
Drew Magary’s Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here....