fl Page 563 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Jets Are Bringing Their Own Toilet Paper To London
NFL teams are obsessed with routine. Surprises are the worst possibilities imaginable, unless they’re tricking their opponents. When the Jets travel to London for this Sunday’s game against the Dolphins, they’ll be bringing all the American supplies they can in order to keep the peace, including toi...
Mark Davis Travels 500 Fucking Miles To Look Like That!
Probably no haircut in human history has communicated as devastating a summation of its owner’s entire life as the insane orange Moe Howard bowl cut sported by Oakland Raiders owner Mark Davis. Carve the shape of it into the wall of his father Al Davis’s mausoleum and it will tell a richer and truer...
Congress Seeks To Ban Military-Sponsored NFL Salutes
In May, Sen. Jeff Flake (R-Ariz) and NJ.com revealed that those salutes to the troops, so omnipresent at football games, are no mere gesture of appreciation. They’re advertising, and the Department of Defense has paid the NFL more than $6 million over the last four seasons to honor the troops with c...
The NFL Is Closely Watching Hurricane Joaquin
Hurricane Joaquin, currently churning off the Bahamas, is expected to dump a ton of rain on the Mid-Atlantic and Northeast at best, and at worst, come ashore as a powerful storm. Some models put it arriving in Virginia, perhaps right in time for Sunday afternoon’s Eagles-Skins game....
Cam Newton Isn't Buying Ed Hochuli's Denial
On Sunday, Panthers QB Cam Newton said referee Ed Hochuli told him he didn’t get a call on a late hit because he wasn’t “old enough.” Hochuli denied it, and video of the conversation between the two appeared to show the ref telling Newton he didn’t get a flag because he was running outside the pocke...
Debbie Does Drywall: Why Home-Renovation Porn Is My Favorite Porn
Have you ever harbored sexual feelings toward a granite countertop, or imagined that a dual-vanity sink was actually former Prince ingénue Vanity? If so, you’re likely already an avid fan of HGTV (Home & Garden Television, although gardens are scarce), a cable channel that makes the rigorous renovat...
Don't Mess Up Your Anniversary
The tough thing about writing a definitive guide to anniversaries is that every couple should, quite rightly, handle them differently....
A Whole Bunch Of Browns Say TMZ's Johnny Manziel Story Was Made-Up
The big story in Brownsland yesterday was a TMZ report that cited three unnamed “offensive starters” calling for the team to switch back to Johnny Manziel at quarterback. As if that weren’t already a narrow pool of suspects, Browns starters have since raced to deny it was them—six players at latest ...
Tom Brady And The NFL May Have One Last Courtroom Showdown Days Before The Super Bowl
Ballghazi isn’t over, but both the NFL and Tom Brady would like it to be as soon as possible—or, more specifically, to be resolved before the start of the 2016 season. A federal appeals court has granted a request by both sides to expedite the appeal hearing, and the timing could turn out to be fun,...
Aaron Rodgers Moving Around Is Its Own Kind Of Highlight
Watching Aaron Rodgers play quarterback is the most satisfying experience that the NFL currently has to offer, so we’re gonna go ahead and keep throwing confetti on him on a regular basis. We’ve been over his arm strength and ridiculous accuracy, but last night’s performance was all about that other...
Kid At Rangers Game Won't Stop Flexing And Kissing His Biceps
The Tigers and Rangers might have been playing Monday night, but the real entertainment was in the stands. One kid in a Rangers shirt refused to stop flexing and kissing his biceps until his mom shut down the gun show....
Sounds Like Some Browns Players Want Johnny Manziel Back
Despite winning his start and looking generally decent and genuinely exciting, Johnny Manziel was benched by the Browns the minute Josh McCown passed his concussion tests. After Cleveland’s loss to the Raiders, coach Mike Pettine bluntly said the team isn’t considering going back to Manziel. Judging...
The Chiefs Finally Put An End To Football's Silliest Streak
I can appreciate a good sports streak as much as anyone, but the dumb ones are always more fun than the actually impressive ones. Which is why last night’s Chiefs-Packers game was, despite Aaron Rodgers’s continued brilliance, kind of a bummer. The Chiefs, for the first time in 18 regular-season gam...
Ed Hochuli Denies Telling Cam Newton He Isn't "Old Enough" To Get A Call
Cam Newton was upset about a borderline-late hit that went uncalled in Carolina’s 27-22 win over New Orleans, and he was even more upset by what he said was referee Ed Hochuli’s explanation: “He said, ‘Cam, you’re not old enough to get that call.’” Hochuli denies it, and if you can read lips, you ca...
Can The Broncos Figure Out How To Use Peyton Manning?
No battle plan survives contact with the enemy. On paper, it made all the sense in the world for Gary Kubiak to reimagine the Broncos offense, emphasizing the run more, and lining up his quarterback in different positions to keep opponents off-balance. In practice, Peyton Manning doesn’t like taking...
Son Of Jets Coach Caught Talking Shit About Players In Locker Room
The son of Jets tight ends coach Jimmie Johnson learned a valuable lesson about Twitter yesterday. The lesson, as always, is to never tweet....
Steve Smith's Review Of The Bengals Secondary: Trash, Trash, Fuckboy
If Steve Smith actually walks away from the game after this season as planned, the NFL will lose one captivating ball of hate. The 36-year-old Ravens receiver treats talking trash like an art, and he was in the zone Sunday after catching his second touchdown of the game to give the Ravens a 24-21 le...
Things Did Not End Well For This Daring Browns Fan
The photo above was taken by a reader who was tailgating at yesterday’s Browns game, in an area aptly named The Pit. We’ll let him tell you what happened next:...
Brandon Marshall Says His Failed Lateral Was "The Worst Play In NFL History"
That’s hyperbole, of course. Mark Sanchez was right there on the Eagles sideline for this one, and he could tell you about a worse play that took place in this same stadium. But Marshall’s lateral attempt that donked directly off an opponent’s facemask was momentous in the same tragicomic way....