fl Page 627 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Why Do NBA Teams Tank So Damn Much?
Before you head off to the airport and discover newfound levels of hatred for your fellow man, a quick programming note: I am off for the next week, which means half of this week and half of next week, because having Christmas and New Year's both fall on a Thursday makes everything weird. Anyway,...
OH GOD THE FLU IS GOING AROUND!!!!
Hey, you! Did you hear? THE FLU IS GOING AROUND! Oh, sweet Jesus strapped to a fuck gun! THE FLU! It's around! Out there. Possibly far, but also possibly near! People have it! The neighbor has it! Your dad has it! The whole Winklefart family has it! I heard 30 kids in Darla's second grad...
Rolando McClain's Mansion Burns Down In "Suspicious" Fire
Cowboys linebacker Rolando McClain's Alabama home burned to the ground last night, and investigators would love to find out more about a car seen speeding from the scene....
Niners Will "Look Into" If Aldon Smith Was Drinking With Ray McDonald
The sexual assault investigation involving Ray McDonald also might have implications for San Francisco 49ers linebacker Aldon Smith. As part of the investigation, the woman told San Jose police that she drank cranberry and vodkas with McDonald and Smith, according to a search warrant filed in Santa ...
Cops Posed As Woman To See If Ray McDonald Would Incriminate Himself
A search warrant filed as part of the sexual assault investigation involving Ray McDonald was made public yesterday, and it reveals what the woman told police as well as how cops have investigated the case—including posing as the woman in a text message exchange with the former 49er....
Rex Grossman Turns Down The Browns
Johnny Manziel is out for the year with a hamstring injury. Brian Hoyer is nursing a shoulder injury and may not be able to go on Sunday. Cleveland needs a quarterback. Rex Grossman is not that quarterback. He's busy....
Steve Young Compares Peyton Manning To Obama, Or Something
I think Steve Young is trying to say that for Denver to beat Cincinnati tonight Peyton Manning needs to play well—which, duh—but did he need to use some garbled metaphor about Manning, Obama, and dictatorship to do it? Or is he trying to sneak some political commentary about Obama—go search Twitter ...
Pats Fan At Jets Game Gets Nachos Dumped All Over Him In Fight
We aren't sure the context here, but it appears our brave Patriots fan—not only did he venture out to Jets country, he did so while sporting his customized team hoodie, which reads "God Maserati"—was being escorted out of the stadium by security when some Jets fans began to taunt him. Mr. Maserati...
Marshawn Lynch's Non-Answers To Stupid Questions Have Reporters Furious
Here's the last half of Marshawn's Lynch's curt, polite press conference after he ran off a play that everyone wanted to talk about. Without taking sides, it's easy to understand why reporters are frustrated that Lynch wouldn't play ball. It's also easy to understand why Lynch hates this shit....
Miami Lost And Then Won The Game On Two Huge Special-Teams Plays
With about five minutes remaining in a tied contest against Minnesota, Miami received a kickoff with the game seemingly tilted in their favor with Win Probability at 61 percent and an opportunity to run clock and take a late go-ahead lead. But rookie wideout Jarvis Landry slipped on the return, got ...
Holy Crap, Marshawn Lynch
The Seahawks could not stop gushing about Marshawn Lynch's overpowering 79-yard touchdown run in last night's 35-6 dismantling of Arizona. We do not blame them. It was Lynch at his bowling-ball best, so bring on the hype....
Cops: QB Threatened AK-47 Massacre Days After Signing With Ole Miss
Police say Chad Kelly, who signed a letter of intent to play quarterback for Ole Miss just days ago, allegedly fought with bouncers at a Buffalo bar and threatened to commit an assault rifle massacre last night. ...
Jimmy Clausen Got Speared In The Head
All about fair play, these Lions are....
No, Aaron Hernandez Wasn't Found Not Guilty
There's an article floating around—mainly on Facebook, but also on Twitter—claiming that Aaron Hernandez was found not guilty of all charges, and will play for the Patriots next season. It is a hoax. A surprising amount of people have believed it....
Lions Center Dominic Raiola Stomps On Bears Lineman's Ankle
Dominic Raiola, the Detroit Lions center who has a reputation for being a prick, intentionally stepped on Bears defensive lineman Ego Ferguson's ankle today. Cool....
Arian Foster Would Like To Remind You Of The Score
In case the Ravens forgot, they're getting handled by the Case Keenum-led Texans. Arian Foster helpfully directed them to the scoreboard. (He's also thrown for a touchdown today.)...
Kenny Albert Snowman Dick
Send stories, photos, and anything else you might have to [email protected]....
Calgary Flames Score On Their Own Net During Delayed Penalty
Flames goalie Jonas Hiller left the net after Calgary had a delayed penalty, but sloppy possession in the offensive zone led to a very long own goal. Yannick Weber was credited with his second goal of the season. Anything is possible!...
Willie Mitchell Uses Kris Letang's Helmet Against Him In Fight
Florida Panthers captain Willie Mitchell got tied up with Pittsburgh's Kris Letang, and inexplicably resorted to swinging Letang's own helmet at him. Willie Mitchell's a lawless man....