french Page 11 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

For These Tennis Fans, The Score Is Love-Mouth
Here's a shot from Maria Sharapova's match a few days ago, during which some Roland Garros spectators appear to be engaged in some hanky-panky. Amour!...

Today In Photograph And Caption Synergy: Caroline Wozniacki Shits A Return
Maybe she had a stomach bug? Maybe she was tired of all the 40-all scores? Whatever the reason, Woz laid a stinker on the court at the French Open today and was ousted by Estonian Kaia Kanepi, 6-1, 6-7 (3-7) 6-3....

Immediately After A 38-Shot Rally, One Tennis Player Collapses And The Other Vomits
Richard Gasquet hit an overhead winner to end a 56 second-long point with Grigor Dimitrov in their French Open second round match today. Gasquet promptly threw up his banana and Dimitrov fell to the ground with a severe leg cramp. Dimitrov never quite recovered; Gasquet would take the next three s...

Rafael Nadal Is Neurotic About Everything (Including Ham)
Rafael Nadal is a troubled soul who hates lots of things. This week, Nadal revealed yet another thing he hates:...

Serena Williams Gives Us A French Open Collapse For The Ages
After winning the first set handily from someone named Virginie Razzano, Serena Williams was leading the second set tiebreak 5-1. She dropped six straight points for the set, and the first five games of the third (in which Serena only managed six points)....

Novak Djokovic Pulled The Old "Hit A Reporter In The Balls While He's Examining Your Tennis Racket" Trick
Anyone who knows anything can tell you that French Canadians are really just here for our amusement. Sure, you get your occasional Avril Lavigne here or there, a crossover superstar, but mostly, it's a sea of Erik Bedards and Jean Chrétiens....

"Fiers De Vous Nourrir" Must Be French For "Look At This Giant Bike We Made Out Of Hay Bales"
Okay, it actually means that the farmers of 44 are "proud to feed you [and also they made a giant bike out of hay bales and tractors]." This display went up during a Tour de France stage earlier in the week, so we're a bit late — but we wanted to share it with you because it is a wonderful represe...

Mavericks Fan Sitting Behind George Lopez Speaks For All America
Your morning roundup for June 6, the day we learned the value of Bernie Madoff's underwear. H/T @bubbaprog, proprietor of mocksession.com, for accurately predicting what might tickle us this morning (and others for sending in their own grabs)....

Lil Jon Still Supports Dutch National Team Even After Drug Tourism Crackdown
Your morning roundup for June 4, the day our plumbing issues got put in perspective. Pic via....

OK, We'll Ask: What's Going On With Roger Federer's Magic Bulge?
At left, a screengrab of Roger Federer from today's French Open semifinal. At right, a wire photo from Federer's quarterfinal matchup on Tuesday. Exact same outfit: much more prominent frank and beans....

Roger Federer Causes Fan Hysteria, Loss In Gravity
The poor girl just wanted a selfie with the maestro, and all she got was a pitying hug. But — and I say this as a former boy band fanatic — I would not completely rule out the possibility that there was some kind of ulterior motive going on here. After all, a pitying hug from Roger Federer is stil...

Viktor Troicki Can Blame His French Open Exit On A 12-Year-Old Boy
Viktor Troicki, the 15 seed in the French Open, nearly upset No. 4 Andy Murray today in Paris, in a five set match that took two days to complete. Murray won 4-6, 4-6, 6-3, 6-2, 7-5, but in a game in which any single point can swing the momentum of a match, Troicki will likely remember his interru...

Rafael Nadal's Post-Match Comments Display The Self-Esteem Of A Teenage Girl
Rafael Nadal may not be quite on Novak Djokovic's unbeatable level, but, uh, he's still number one in the world. You'd think that would manifest itself in his words with reporters after a straight-sets victory over Ivan Ljubicic today....

Novak Djokovic Is So Good That He Already Won Tomorrow's Match
Take note, aspiring tennisfolk, because this is the kind of thing that happens for you if you're on a 41-match win streak in 2011....

At Least One Bounce Went Right For Kim Clijsters In Her Second-Round Exit
Kim Clijsters, seeded No. 2 in the French Open, lost to Arantxa Rus (real name) in the second round yesterday. She fell 3-6, 7-5, 6-1 to the 114th-ranked player in the world. But it wasn't all bad! Clijsters also had one of the most fantastical bounces we've ever seen in tennis. This is the kind o...

47 Of Maria Sharapova's Grunts In Her Second-Round French Open Win
Maria Sharapova faced Caroline Garcia, a 17-year-old French up-and-comer, in the second round of the French Open today. Garcia took the first set and led 4-1 until midway through the second, when Sharapova took 11 straight games to win, 3-6, 6-4, 6-0. Sharapova's known for her grunting, of course;...

Admiring Novak Djokovic's Last 40 Match Points
Novak Djokovic has won 38 straight tennis matches in the 2011 season, and he hasn't lost in 40 outings, dating back to November's Davis Cup. His dominance has been nearly absolute; in seven months, he's dropped just eight sets, and that includes seven wins against either Rafael Nadal or Roger Fede...

There Was A Poignant, Action Figure-Only Funeral For The Macho Man In A Backyard This Weekend
Your morning roundup for May 23, the day Beyoncé ran the world. Staged Macho Man funeral via HuggingHaroldReynolds.com....

Watch ESPN's Doris Burke Flub Her Lines About Oklahoma City Arena
Your morning roundup for May 22, the day some people in North Carolina started taking Pirates of the Caribbean too literally, but not in a cool swashbuckling way or anything....

Future Of French Open Site Spurs Most Pretentious Debate Ever
On Sunday, the 180 delegates of the French Tennis Federation will meet to decide the future of Roland Garros Stadium, which could change locations by 2016. This has fueled a wonderfully pretentious debate on the merits of the two possible outcomes: shall the century-old tournoi remain in posh wester...