g Page 4968 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

How To Shoot A Shark In The Head
"I'm scared," squeals a child as the executioner brings his revolver to bear on the 7-foot bull shark, Nguyễn Ngọc Loan-style. Smile, you son of a— [via AnimalNY]...

I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream For Free Readings
Hey, New Yorkers: it's time for another portion of Gelf magazine's Varsity Letters series of free readings. Tonight at 7:30: gambling, bodybuilding, and The Girl Who Struck Out Babe Ruth. That's 7:30, DUMBO, and free....

Tarvaris Jackson: I'm Super, Thanks For Asking
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: potential Vikings starter Tarvaris Jackson....

A Thorough Analysis Of Han Solo’s Ability To Score Space Poon
Your letters:...

And This Is Why Life Is Precious
[Kige via "YouTube Workouts"]...

Humiliating Goal Miss Alert: Rui Miguel Edition
Everyone's been there - just you and the goal, the ball floating in. Man, you could pelvic thrust it in if you really wanted to....

I-Reports: Matthew Berry's Friend's Famous Strange Was Probably Mira Sorvino
Previously, we brought your attention to The Case of Matthew Berry's Friend Hooking Up With An Oscar-Winning Actress. The response has been a hodgepodge of famous women and the amount of research that went into this project is staggering. Let's recap....

Today, In Questionable Product Placement
Does reading about Lance Armstrong putting horse steroids (or whatever) in his body make you thirsty for an Armstrong-endorsed energy supplement? The targeted advertising on this ESPN.com story seems to think so. [h/t Doug, and like 4 other people]...

Last Night's Winner: Bankruptcy Auction Enthusiasts
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the reporters working the Texas Rangers bankruptcy auction, who got quite a showdown last night between two of the biggest figures in Texas sports....

Minor League Promotion Will Put You Off Eating For A While
It wasn't your typical eating contest last night at Eastlake Stadium, home of the Indians' single-A club. No, it spanned nine innings, with nine different courses (that's Spam in the photo), and ended in vomit, vomit everywhere....

Only Peyton Could Make A Badass Visor Look Goofy
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Your Brett Favre Cock Story Backlash Roundup
Welcome back to the heaving underbelly of the internet. That incessant hum you hear is because some people are all atwitter about the ethics and legitimacy of a post on this site. Read and enjoy....

Germany Being Overrun By Radioactive Boars
Twenty-five years after Chernobyl, German scientists are finding that more and more of the country's skyrocketing boar population is radioactive. The Russian payback for WWII will never end. [Der Spiegel, via]...

Joe Paterno And Dean Smith, Going Out On Their Own, Very Different Terms
Observations that Paterno's health — body and mind — have declined noticeably should be heartbreaking. So why aren't we as sad about it as we ought to be?...

Utah's Ban On Beer Sales Forces Baseball Team To Fold
The independent St. George RoadRunners ceased operations this week, with the owner citing the absence of beer at the ballpark as the critical factor. You try watching semi-pro ball, in the desert, surrounded by Mormons, and do it sober. [Deseret News]...

LeBron James Is Going To Fix The South Florida Housing Market
Today's newest LeBron news: he's going to fix the housing market in the Miami area because so many people want to be nearer to his effervescence, witness spectacular basketball, and jump on and off the bandwagon as close to home as possible....

Philly Fans: Kevin Kolb Wants To Hear Your Boos
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: the Philadelphia Eagles shiny and new starting QB Kevin Kolb....

Serial Semen Squirter Finally Behind Bars
Michael Edwards Jr. is accused of spraying Gaithersburg, Md., shoppers with semen from a bottle. Police say there are other victims out there, and they're unsure of where the semen came from. Carl Monday warned us, people. [WaPo]...

I Don't Care About Alex Rodriguez's 600th Home Run
As a Yankees fan, people have been asking me for the past few weeks what I thought about A-Rod's chase for 600. Okay, nobody's asked me that. But my girlfriend did ask if 600 is a lot. Yeah, I suppose it is....

Not A Whole Lot Happening At Training Camp
Here's a roundup of training camp stories from around the league....