gi Page 525 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Claude Giroux Scores Dong Goal For Flyers But Isn't Into Dong Talk
Here's Flyers color guy Steve "Coatesy" Coates chuckling at Claude Giroux's reticence to talk about where the puck hit him on a second-period tip-in goal last night. It's funny because it hit the dongal zone of his uniform pants....

Your College Football Early Games Open Thread
They've banned vuvuzelas at the Harvard-Yale game. And they're rocking out with their gamecock out for the South Carolina/Troy game. ...

A Day Before The Game, The NCAA Figures Out That Wrigley Is A Death Trap For Football
It's, oh, 27 hours until Illinois and Northwestern kick off. But they'll be kicking off in one direction, every time, because one end zone goes right up against the brick and ivy walls. Tomorrow's going to look like backyard football....

Why The Fuck Are Your Stadium Lights On?
Reader Brian Mendonca sent us this photo of AT&T Park in San Francisco last night. "AT&T Park lit up like a Christmas tree. No sign of any events going on..."...

One "Worst Player In NFL History" Is Volcanically Pissed About Being A "Worst Player In NFL History"
Jeff Pearlman's massive list of football putridity has provoked an emotional reaction from Detroit Lions' safety, C.C. Brown, who was selected as the 90th worst player. He was not pleased with his ranking. In fact, he went completely berserk. ....

Single, Wiser, More Sexting-Savvy Tiger Woods Writes About Redefining Victory In Newsweek
In Nike's "Earl and Tiger" commercial, Earl Woods' voice told his son he wanted to know "what your thinking was...what your feelings are, and did you learn anything." In Newsweek today, Tiger tried to provide an answer to that essay prompt....

Ron Zook Freaks Out, Has A Jim Mora Moment
After Illinois' loss to Minnesota last Saturday, Ron Zook addressed the team's prospects for bowl eligibility. It's one of the finest moments in Motor-Mouth History. H/T Erik...

Wrigley Field Tarts Itself Up For Another Rich Loser
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Giants Stadium Loses Power, Fans Quickly Resort To Violence
Usually at the Meadowlands, everybody's really friendly. That was not the case yesterday when a blown transformer caused a power outage in the new stadium. The fans reacted by very calmly, very assuredly, beating the crap out of each other....

Jesus Walks Like A Cowboy: Manny Pacquiao Does Dallas
ARLINGTON, Texas —When Jesus returns, he will surely return to the 50-yard line of Cowboys Stadium, descending bodily on the fog-machine-assisted sun rays streaming through the windows just above the mighty Ford logo, but below the American flag....

Athletes Teach Us How To Dougie
2010 has become the year of the "Dougie" in sports. We're still trying to master the Chicken Noodle Soup....

Niche Sports Romance Goes All Soap Opera
Olympic speed-skater Joey Cheek dumped billionaire heiress Georgina Bloomberg (NYC's mayor's daughter) while she was in the hospital recovering from a show-jumping accident. Concussion, fractured vertebra, broken heart. [NY Post]...

Your NFL Early Games Open Thread
Sweet God in heaven, is the Mangini Bowl really the best thing going on in the early games? Fine, Jets/Browns can also be spun as Ryan vs. Ryan [Plain Dealer], but still. Vikings/Bears? Titans/Dolphins? I suggest AC Milan/Inter Milan....

Column-Kicking Lady Hockey Fan Sought By Authorities
Yesterday, we brought you the delightful video of the seemingly inebriated Bruins fan kicking a hole through a column in a TD Garden restroom. We all had some laughs and moved on, with the exception of TD Garden officials....

Bleacher Report Suspends Cam Newton
Of course, there's the possibility that BR has the exclusive and we just look like fools here. But that's not a world I want to live in. [Bleacher Report Google Cache, h/t Josh]...

Gilbert Arenas Opens Up About Crapping In People's Shoes
In January, in a Gilbert Arenas feature for the Washington Post, Mike Wise and Michael Lee casually noted that Gil, a renowned locker room prankster, "once defecated in teammate Andray Blatche's shoe." It's brushed over pretty quickly and the article moves on....

Three Timeless Pieces Of Americana: Yankee Stadium, Army, And Rooting Against Notre Dame
Yankee Stadium is readied for next weekend's Army-Notre Dame game. Word of advice: don't let Jeter play a zone D. [Twitter]...

Former NFL Player Dave Meggett Sentenced To 30 Years In Prison
Meggett was a running back and punt returner for three NFL teams between 1989 and 1998. He has a long history of sexual assault. On Wednesday, he was convicted on charges of criminal sexual assault and burglary. [AP]...

If You Bet On The Patriots, You're A Huge Dick
Dude loses Super Bowl XLII bet, gets 6-inch penis wearing Giants helmet tattooed on his thigh. Or maybe he asked a genie for a "giant penis," and it was one of those Monkey's Paw-type ironies. [Barstool Sports] [Mildly NSFW photo inside]...

Derek Jeter Is A Gold Glover, Somehow (UPDATE)
There are no words. It's as if Joe Morgan left a giant turd on the carpet on his way out the door. [HardballTalk]...