gi Page 605 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Eli Manning Has A Hard Time Meeting Girls
We don't listen to the radio much — we're too busy with Meat Loaf and REO Speedwagon on an endless iPod loop — so we missed this little tidbit from the Opie and Anthony "show." Some guy named Jason Itzler, who used to run the NY Confidential "escort" service, was a guest on the show, and the hosts a...
Inside The Awful Illini Car Accident
As most of you have heard by now, two Illinois basketball players — center Brian Carlwell and shooting guard Jamar Smith — were injured in a car accident last night in Champaign. Smith suffered a concussion, but Carlwell is currently listed in critical condition at Carle Foundation Hospital, a hospi...
Why West Virginia Is So Good At Home
Just to make sure we end your day on as lowbrow a point as we can possibly muster, here's the reason UCLA lost to West Virginia on Saturday. This guy. Let this be a lesson for all of you: Do not come into this guy's house and expect to escape alive....
Agent Zero Fails To Back It Up
Gilbert Arenas had vowed to get 50 points against the Blazers today, in his continuing revenge tour against the coaching staff of the US Olympic basketball team. Blazers head man Nate McMillan was one of those coaches. Gilbert even implored ESPN to pick up the game to witness his spiteful heroics. H...
Tim Duncan is Not Tall Enough
Dwight Howard is getting all the credit for this, and sure ... Dwight Howard's freakish abilities speak for themselves. But how about that lob from Hedo Turkoglu? Magic Johnson couldn't have done it better. Picture perfect. I'm going to go out on a limb and say that's the best contribution to basket...
Ron Zook Will Turn Your Conventional Wisdom Upside Down
Our beloved alma mater, the University of Illinois, is having a mediocre year in basketball and has won, like, four games in two years, even forcing us to sit through a 33-0 loss to Rutgers last year that mostly resembled a cock fight between a rabid rooster and an egg. But worry not, fellow alums: ...
DeShawn Stevenson Doesn't Care About His Money
From time to time, you'll hear about a ridiculous bet that NBA players make during practice... something like putting a couple grand on a halfcourt shooting contest. And I always think, "Man I'd love to watch something like that."...
New ABA Coach Has Cleanest Rain Gutters In His Neighborhood
We love the Dodge City Legends' motion offense; the one in which their center sets picks at the top of the key. Because it's important to keep the tallest player in the history of organized basketball as far away from the basket as you can at all times. You've probably heard of Sun Ming Ming, a nati...
Bonds Contract: Baseball's Version Of A Constitutional Crisis?
So someone took the time to actually read the contract that Barry Bonds signed with the Giants on Monday, and they made a startling discovery. According to the fine print, Bonds not only must play both ends of any doubleheaders, he must dress as Paula Abdul in the second game. Also, there's this:...
Forever Barry
He's 43, kind of a dick and subject to a variety of ailments, including, if you believe the horse steroids charges, laminitis. But nonetheless, Barry Bonds is officially back in the fold with the San Francisco Giants, ready to tackle Mt. Aaron once again. Whew. We were on pins and needles....
Agent Zero Revenge Tour Makes Imaginary Stop At Duke
We must report that our new favorite place to visit on the Internet is Gilbert Arenas' NBA.com blog (sorry, Fleshbot). This is because A). He actually writes it himself, unlike some people; B). There are posts with headlines such as "ESPN The Magazine Took Me Off the Cover" and "I Was Fouled Against...
Yahoo! Still Trying To Catch Reggie Bush
If it's a Thursday, that must mean it's time for another Yahoo !Sports investigation into gifts Reggie Bush might have received at USC. (We don't mean to make light of the hard work Yahoo! has put into its exhaustive investigation, but we repeat that it's hard to take an investigation all that serio...
NBA Roundup: The Sun God Ra Is Very Pleased
Notes on Tuesday's games in the National Basketball Association ......
Bonds And The Giants Just Can't Quit Each Other
Yesterday, Barry Bonds did nobody any favors by endorsing Pete Rose and Mark McGwire for the Hall of Fame, inspiring each of them to put their paws over their face like a goldendoodle puppy. But the bigger news might be that the Giants are considering voiding Bonds' contract after the news of his po...
She's Back! And Just In Time. Bluebirds, Cardinals. Affirmed.
Is it any wonder that Barbaro's latest recovery seems to coincide with the return of Dee Mirich to the Barbaro message board? Things looked bleak recently for Big Boss Horse until, yesterday, this message appeared from the heavens....
Marcus Giles Already Tearing Up San Diego
Marcus Giles has been a member of the San Diego Padres for less than a month; they just got the guy, for crying out loud. You thought it was a nice story, two brothers reunited — and it feels so gooood — but it turns out that it was a recipe for violence!...
NBA Roundup: Are You Not Entertained?
Notes on Monday's games in the National Basketball Association ......
And Michael Strahan Got... JACKED UP!
The offensive linemen who line up against Michael Strahan on Sundays just got a whole lot of new ammunition for trash tralk. And Strahan can't run from it, either, because he's going to have to play football for a loooong time. He can't afford not to....
Gilbert Arenas Rates His Swag
It must be frustrating for Gilbert Arenas sometimes, being stuck on a planet with people who couldn't possibly understand the way his world works. Sometimes, though, an intrepid reporter will try to break through....