gi Page 607 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
A Call Out to Objectify This Man's Wife
From the Letters to the Guest Editor department:...
About Last Night
What you missed while you were trying to nail your girlfriend on your parent's couch while watching Prime. •College football: I wanna be a cowboy, baby. I can smell a pig from a mile away. • NBA: Nowitski...goooood! • College football: Rutgers caps off memorable season with win in bowl game that wil...
Oh Miller Don't Wanna Dance With Somebody
And thankfully, I won't have to watch him feel the heat with somebody. With somebody who (somebody who) loves him. Sigh....
Breaking News! Baseball Player Signs Ridiculous Contract!
I'm so excited to tell you this I might as well just copy and paste the fucker:...
Curse Of The 1980s Giants Infield Continues
We are saddened this morning by reports of the death of former San Francisco Giants third baseman Chris Brown. We don't know what's going on with Giants infielders from the 1980s (Jose Uribe died in a car crash on Dec. 8), but Matt Williams, watch your back. Brown, who was Darryl Strawberry's teamma...
More Fun With Bruce Weber
Since we already devoted a whole post to a game that pretty much only we care about, we're not gonna bore you (again) with details of our Illini's 73-70 win over Missouri last night, the seventh straight win in the series. (Though it was a rather outstanding game, and some people even live-blogged...
Our Yearly Boring Obsession With The Busch Braggin' Rights Game
It's time for our yearly Busch Braggin' Rights game post. Last year, when we headed back to Illinois for the yearly Illinois-Missouri basketball matchup in St. Louis, we marveled at just how poorly coached Missouri was. Quin Snyder, who can still FIRE UP HIS TEAM with the best of them, was fired l...
Can You Tell Them How To Get (How To Get) To The Playoffs?
This photo, from today's New York Times, shows various New York Jets hanging out with Elmo on "Sesame Street." We loved "Sesame Street" as a kid, and have little desire to make fun of the show or anyone for appearing on it. That said, right after this photo was taken, Coles and Elmo shared stories o...
NBA Roundup: Agent Zero Has License To Kill
Notes on Sunday's games in the National Basketball Association ......
West Virginia Is More Tolerant Than You Think
Not only do the West Virginia Mountaineers have a male baton twirler, they have a bad-ass male baton twirler. Meet Donovan Sarr, introduced to us by this WVU press release touting their evidently awesome baton twirling squad....
New Defense Secretary A Closet Online Football Chatterer
Robert Gates, as those of you who lower yourselves to pay attention to the world outside of sports might know, was confirmed by the U.S. Senate as the new Secretary of Defense, replacing Donald Rumsfeld, the Marty Mornhinweg of foreign policy. Gates was most recently president of Texas A&M Universit...
Bonds Back In Only Place That Truly Loves Him
Well, now we can breathe easy over here; Barry Bonds won't be going to St. Louis. (And now that he's not, we'd like to note that we would have never sold out our principles to root for him. Nope! No way! Obviously! Of course not!)...
Insert "They Couldn't Use Their Hands" Joke Here
Goddammit, why can't American athletes be as interesting and publicly debaucherous as British athletes? We mean, seriously....
Bonds In St. Louis, And What It Could Mean For The Human Condition
Part of being a sports fan is making internal deals with yourself. Sure, you might despise, say, Charles Oakley when he's on the other team, but when he's on your team, he's indispensable and the guy you scream for. No matter what he has done in the past, no matter how much he has hurt your team or ...
Welcome To The Hibachi
Gilbert Arenas is a fountain of awesomeness that will never run dry. The latest dip into his well of creative genius brings us a phrase that will surely sweep the nation. Whenever Gilbert puts up a shot that he feels like is going in (which is all of them), he yells ... well, let's let Caron Butle...
Please, Someone, Make Strahan Just Go Away
All right, we'll say it: We absolutely do not believe Michael Strahan when he does anything anymore. Everything the guy does seems so calculated, so media-savvy, so gay dramatic ... well, we just don't buy it anymore. If this guy played in Jacksonville, no one would know about him, or care....
You Cannot Hide From Lance Armstrong
Far be it from us to insinuate that Lance Armstrong is still in the heads of the French cycling establishment, but now they're accusing him of breaking into their email....
Frank Beamer's All-American Ballot
In case you had any doubt left — though we don't know how you could have — that a ballot in the hands of college football coaches is a dangerous thing, here's the All-American ballot from Virginia Tech head coach Frank Beamer....
That Smudge On Your Floor? That's The Big Ten
You know, new Indiana coach Kelvin Sampson isn't known as a disciplinarian in the way that Bob Knight is, but, jeez, he sure does make his players do some pretty publicly humiliating things to their teammates when they lose on national television, doesn't he?...
Deron Williams Is Making Utah Slightly More Tolerable
True Hoop points out something that Illini fans have known for years now and the rest of the basketball world is unabashedly catching on to: Utah Jazz point guard (and former Illini star) Deron Williams is freaking awesome....