go Page 421 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Finals Are Butt And I'm So Mad At The Cavs
First things first: They get no credit for making the Finals. LeBron James could win three playoff series in the East with any four Supreme Court justices as his running mates. Account for that, and what have these bozos contributed to the effort?...
Six Ways The Cavs Can Get Back Into This Series
The Cleveland Cavaliers have been dominated by the Golden State Warriors through the first two games of the NBA Finals. Down 2-0, the Cavs are running short on chances to get back into the series, but I think they still have a shot if they make the following adjustments....
It Seems The Cavs Are Just Now Learning That The Warriors Play Small
The Warriors disemboweled the Cavaliers last night, winning by 33 in a game that didn’t feel that close, and while there are a million different reasons why, one of the biggest is how effectively Golden State played small. Down two to begin the second quarter, the Warriors went the next 12 minutes w...
Kevin Love In Concussion Protocol After Taking Elbow To The Head
This hasn’t exactly been the redemptive trip to the Finals Kevin Love was probably hoping for. After scoring 17 points and grabbing 13 rebounds in the Game 1 loss, Love had the worst night possible in Game 2. He scored five points and corralled three rebounds in 21 minutes, and had to remove himself...
The Greatest Writing About The Greatest
Muhammad Ali, the greatest athlete of the 20th century, was to writers of his time what the Madonna and Child were to painters of the Renaissance. Everyone took a crack at Ali. Here at The Stacks, we’re been honored to curate Ali stories that previously weren’t available online. Our collection makes...
Colombia Take 2-0 Lead; At Least We Get The Heavy Metal Goal Call
A handball in the box set James Rodríguez up for a penalty that put Colombia up 2-0 on the U.S., and our only consolation is that we get to listen to El Cantante del Gol, Javier Fernández, call it—as heard in Colombia on Caracol TV....
Should Intent Matter When A Lousy Player Whacks A Guy In The Dick And Balls?
For my money, the strangest moment of last night’s lopsided NBA Finals Game 1 came just after Cavaliers guard Matthew Dellavedova whacked Warriors forward Andre Iguodala in the dick and balls....
The Cavs Should Replace Matthew Dellavedova With This Dog
I would be willing to bet a sizable amount of money that at some point during these NBA Finals, bad basketball player Matthew Dellavedova will throw a wildly inaccurate and embarrassing lob pass. It’s his signature move, after all....
Florida Panthers Unveil New Logo And Jerseys
I certainly never hated any of the Panthers’ old uniforms. (Except that blue alternate they used for a couple of years. Blue? Come on.) I even kind of liked the leaping panther logo; it certainly dated the look, but not in a bad way, if that makes sense. Of the many teams that could use a makeover, ...
Padres Blow 10-Run Lead, Give Up Nine Runs With Two Outs, Are A Complete Embarrassment
As the 2001 Seattle Mariners know, no lead is safe. The 2016 version of that team revisited that lesson last night against the Padres, but ended up on the better side of it with the biggest comeback of the MLB season....
Shaun Livingston's Jumper Is The Poison On The Warriors' Blade
Imagine playing for the Cavaliers, and spending the better part of the last two nights stress-dreaming about how you will possibly be able to survive Steph Curry and Klay Thompson. Then imagine playing in Game 1 of the NBA Finals and escaping their wrath with nothing more than a 20-point flesh wound...
The Warriors Didn't Even Need Their Stars To Wallop The Cavs
Here’s how thorough the whooping the Warriors bench put on the Cavaliers in tonight’s 104-89 beatdown was: Shaun Livingston got a curtain call; the Cavs’ best highlight was a nutshot; Brandon Rush and Timofey Mozgov played; Golden State’s bench outscored Cleveland’s 45-5 before a brief garbage time ...
Matthew Dellavedova Thumps Andre Iguodala In The Dick And Balls
Earlier today, we had Matthew Dellavedova atop our rankings of the most hateable players in the NBA Finals, and he lived up to his billing in short order, striking the first blow against an opponent’s dick and balls. The victim? Andre Iguodala....
Donald Trump Doesn't Know Shit About The Bay Area
Vulgar olive loaf Donald Trump is hitting the campaign trail in California in advance of the state’s June 7 primary. A good way to appeal to your constituents is to show that you’re “one of them” by feigning nominal interest in their sports teams. If you do this, though, you should have a working se...
Whatever Happens, Anderson Varejão Is Going To Be A Dude With A Championship Ring
The Warriors are a ruthlessly efficient team run by a fiery, undersized center who will take out his anger on your dick and balls and a teeny-tiny point guard who carries himself with a non-insistent swagger, and they’re owned by a techno-libertarian pug who named his dogs after Ayn Rand characters....
Hatem Ben Arfa Won't Be At The Euros, But Let's Watch Him Flay Defenders Anyway
Overshadowed in the international selection controversy sparked by Eric Cantona’s comments and Karim Benzema’s fanning of the flames was Cantona’s lamentation that Hatem Ben Arfa wasn’t called up for the France team for the Euros. As understandable as the Ben Arfa snub is, it’s still sad. Because Be...
An Extremely Helpful NBA Finals Preview For Basketball Morons
Hello, casual basketball viewer! The NBA Finals begin tonight, pitting LeBron James’s Cleveland Cavaliers against Ayn Rand’s Golden State Warriors in a rematch of last season’s Finals, which the Warriors won in six games. Here’s what to expect, what to look for, and what to pretend to know about eac...
The Hater’s Guide To The 2016 NBA Finals
A few years ago, when my children were very small, I lamented the fact that I had to cut a great deal of sports out of my life. This happens when you have a baby. There’s no time to watch a tetrafinal playoff game because the kid needs to be fed or taken for a stroll or put to bed or have its butt w...
Don't Be Inspired By This Cubs Tattoo
I don’t begrudge this Cubs fan his enthusiasm or his desire to express it, even in a way that feels like the visual equivalent of using plural first person pronouns when recounting the accomplishments of more athletic strangers. I just think he made some choices that shouldn’t be emulated. Let’s loo...