go Page 634 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Eric Hassli's Stoppage Time Volley Proved The Existence Of A Canadian Rocket Program
While the Voyageurs Cup may be one of soccer's less-prestigious trophies, claiming it in the Canadian Championship does have its rewards: specifically, an invite to the CONCACAF Champions League. Last night's first leg between Whitecaps and Toronto FC in Vancouver looked like an upset 1-0 win by t...
Derrick Rose Is Now Getting Around With A Walker
With his recovery expected to take eight to 12 months, we all knew the Bulls' superstar was in for a grind. But this is just so sad. Until we saw this photo, we had no idea his rehab regimen would also include bingo games, afternoon naps, and the occasional early-bird special....
Alex Gordon Is The Best Advertisement For Wearing A Cup
For a fan, extra-inning games are only fun when your team wins. I stayed up past midnight for that? Well, how do you think Alex Gordon feels? The Royals took the first-place Orioles to 15 innings, only for Gordon, the game's last batter, to foul one off his little gentlemen. He would subsequently g...
Rays Infielder Will Rhymes Passed Out After Being Hit By A Pitch Tonight [UPDATE]
A horrifying scene unfolded at Tropicana Field in the bottom of the eighth inning of tonight's Rays-Red Sox game as Tampa Bay infielder Will Rhymes collapsed on the field after being hit on the arm by a pitch from Boston's Franklin Morales....
The Padres And Nationals Were Ready To Resume Play, But Three Of The Umpires Were Nowhere To Be Found
Umpires often like to say they're doing their jobs when no one notices them. But Tony Randazzo, Alan Porter, and Larry Vanover weren't trying to prove themselves when they literally disappeared for a moment yesterday at Nationals Park....
Enough With The Mystical Cubs Bullshit, Please
Can we talk about this? Can we talk about everything wrong with the notion that if the Cubs are to succeed—if they are to finally, evitably win a championship—they have to first tear down Wrigley Field? That there is bad juju on Waveland and hoodoo on Sheffield and black alchemy on Addison and maybe...
Steve Bartman's True Identity Revealed: He's Al Bundy
First, we brought you the Jose Canseco joke that launched a thousand Jose Canseco jokes. Now, we bring you evidence that Steve Bartman is Al Bundy. Or perhaps even more insidious, Bartman was merely a stooge in a wide ranging conspiracy to prove the writers of Married...With Children soothsaying o...
Harris English Tee Shot Drills TPC Sawgrass Volunteer
A fan was hit in the head after a Harris English drive off the tee at TPC Sawgrass this afternoon. On the fly. I don't know what the odds are, but I think we can all agree it's pretty impressive for English. And incredibly unlucky for the fan....
Brewers Closer John Axford Blows Save, Endears Himself To Media Anyway
Normally when a player fails to "take his lumps" or "stand up and face the music" or however else you'd like to phrase "talk to the media after screwing up," he is taken to task. John Axford, however, had a pretty good excuse and let the media know via handwritten message....
Don Nelson Finally Will Graduate From College This Weekend
You know what they say. All these dumb NBA players go to college to play basketball, not to learn; it's a farce. No one gets a degree. Things used to be much better in the 1960s before John Calipari and all his fancy sneakers came to town....
Here Are The Best Entries In Our Drunk, Sulking Patrick Kane Photoshop Contest
This fine entry kicked off our Patrick Kane photoshop contest, but somehow we knew our wise readers had more in store. And you did not disappoint. I've picked the best ones here—with special commendation for our winner at the end—because we can cram only so many images into a gallery, but keep in mi...
Reconstructing Patrick Kane's Drunken Weekend In Madison, With Eyewitness Testimony
On Monday we showed you photos of a soused Patrick Kane in Madison, Wis., and then we asked you if you knew more about what happened while Kane was there. We had heard some bad stories—that Kane supposedly choked a woman, that Kane supposedly said anti-Semitic things—and we wanted to know if other p...
Cubs Ballgirl Caught On Camera Writing Note Was Rejecting Fan's Request For Her Phone Number
The video you see above made its way around the internet in recent days, and had even been sent to us by a handful of tipsters. All we knew was what we saw: A ballgirl at Wrigley Field filling out a note and handing it to a ballpark attendant. Naturally, an expert (read: Cubs broadcaster Bob Brenl...
Greg Oden Says He Became An Alcoholic, Got Offers To Work In Porn
Mark Titus has a piece over at Grantland that offers a "rare and candid" look at the reclusive Greg Oden, who was finally released by the Trail Blazers in March after five seasons marked mostly by injuries. Titus, who writes about his basketball experiences on his blog, Club Trillion, acknowledges u...
Padres Fan Catches Foul Ball In Beer Cup, Chugs
OK, OK. As you can see in the video below, it wasn't a clean grab, since it's obvious the ball ricocheted into dude's cup. But so what? Both Padres play-by-play man Dick Enberg and his broadcast partner, Mark Grant, knew what had to be done. And, just like that, dude obliged....
How Bobcat Goldthwait Became A True Artist Of Independent Cinema. (Seriously.)
Bobcat Goldthwait, in almost every possible fashion, belongs on the list of those creatures who could only have come of celebrity age in the '80s, along with Emmanuel Lewis, Grace Jones, and Dr. Ruth. When the highlight of your popularity is that you were the star of the second through fourth Police...
Do You Know Any More About Patrick Kane's Drunken Saturday In Wisconsin?
Earlier today, we gleefully shared with you a compendium of photos of a blotto Patrick Kane. He was having good, clean fun at Saturday's Mifflin Street block party in Madison, or so we thought, anyway. We've since heard some things that don't reflect so well on Kaner. If you were at the Kollege Klub...
Patrick Kane's Offseason Drinking Regimen Is Off To A Great Start
Sometimes it's easy to forget that Blackhawks star Patrick Kane is only 23 years old. Wait, did I say "sometimes... easy to forget?" I meant "always... impossible to forget." Here's Kaner being Kaner, as Kaner does, in Madison, Wis., for Cinco de Mayo on Saturday. Evidently he was more welcome than ...
Editor's Note: Jonny Gomes Is Awesome
Over the weekend, our own Sean Newell asked if Jonny Gomes, the Oakland A's outfielder and designated Rob Deer, was "the biggest douchebag in baseball." Gomes's apparent crime was admiring a go-ahead home run. Here are some things to know about Jonny Gomes: He was occasionally homeless as a kid. He ...
