go Page 658 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Read Tim Thomas's Odd Explanation For Skipping The Bruins' Day At The White House, And Then Back Slowly Away
Here's the 2011 Conn Smythe and Vezina winner, pamphleteering online:...
This Is How Close Chip Kelly Was To Leaving Oregon To Coach The Tampa Bay Buccaneers
What you see above are two versions of this morning's front page of the Register-Guard of Eugene, Ore. No, that's not an error, nor is it a do-over on a report that wound up reaching the masses. A source told the newspaper last night that Kelly, 34-6 in three seasons as the University of Oregon's f...
Why We Scapegoat
Because Billy Cundiff exists, Ravens fans don't have to come to terms with the fact that one of the best rushing teams ceded the turf to one of the worst. Or that they could only turn three New England turnovers into six points. Or that their offensive line turned to soggy swiss cheese at the merest...
Kristin Cavallari And Jay Cutler Are Gonna Have A Baby
So what if Jay Cutler got injured and missed six games of the Bears' season, causing the team to miss the playoffs? He's more POTENT than he's ever been!...
Lionel Messi's Hat Trick-Finishing Goal Brought Announcer Ray Hudson To Orgasm
Barcelona spanked Málaga 4-1 today in La Liga, and the world's best soccer player Lionel Messi took over as Spain's leading scorer on the season with this hat trick-finishing goal. It sent commentator Ray Hudson into an even more over-the-top frenzy than usual, from his cats-mating shriek to his e...
Ricardo Clark's 97th-Minute Goal Gave The U.S. Their First Win Over A South American Team In Five Years
A 13-match winless streak against South American squads came to an end tonight when Ricardo Clark finally found net in the final moments of stoppage time of the United States' friendly against Venezuela....
Homemade Infographic: Google Images Isn't Excited About The Los Angeles Clippers Yet
Have Chris Paul and Blake Griffin led Los Angeles's No. 2 NBA team into a new era of respect and recognition yet? Here's an analysis of results from a Google Images search for "Clippers": ...
Ryan Miller: "Nope."
Yeah, it's late, but holy crap did you see the save Ryan Miller laid on Tanner Glass last night? Glass is all like "that's going in" and the Jets are like "yeah!" but Miller is like "oh hell no" and flings that thing out of there, presumably accompanied by a whip-crack sound effect, and Jason Pomi...
As A Golfer Considers His Shot, A Sound Guy Behind Him Absolutely Eats It
The Humana Challenge used to be the Bob Hope Classic, but what's Bob Hope going to do about it? He's dead. But while Bob was never particularly big on physical humor, even he would have gotten a kick out of this sound guy's entrance, stage left....
Cuba Gooding Jr. Invites Linda Cohn To Rock Out With Her Cock Out
Cuba Gooding Jr. appeared on SportsCenter today to promote his new film Red Tails (which, as far as we can tell, is fully unrelated to sports) and performed some awkward impersonations, including one of Allen Iverson which ended in an aborted-too-late "rock out with your cock out!" We're pretty s...
9 Things I Learned In The Parent Encouragement Program, AKA Shitty Parents Anonymous
The Parent Encouragement Program is a series of classes and workshops that are available to parents living in the D.C. area. The introductory class is free, and so I went a couple of weeks ago, because it didn't cost anything and because I need all the help I can get. The title of the workshop was "...
Former Pro Golfer Netted In Massive Sex Sting
Steve Thomas, who's played 78 tournaments on the PGA and Champions Tours (though none since 2010), was among 40 people arrested in an Osceola County (Fla.) Sheriff's Office sting operation. "Operation Red Cheeks" set Thomas up to believe he was negotiating for sex with a minor....
Tiger Woods And Tony Romo To Double-Team Pebble Beach
Tiger Woods will open his 2012 at next month's Pebble Beach National Pro-Am, and it seems his playing partner will be Tony Romo, who's no slouch with a driver and always available in early February. Now let's all try to pretend that wasn't Romo in the cheating-on-a-pregnant-wife blind item, and Wood...
Mike Martz Is Retiring
So reports Jason La Canfora. Martz tells the Chicago Sun-Times "It's time." Ominous. He's turning 61 in May....
Turns Out That African Fellow Running A Gold-For-Sale Scam Was Dikembe Mutombo
WHO WANTS TO SEX BUY $10 MILLION WORTH OF CONFLICT MINERALS FROM MUTOMBO?...
Ben Blood Upholds The Time-Honored Hockey Tradition Of Sucker Punching A Guy In The Handshake Line
His name is Ben Blood, for god's sake. Even if this wasn't the end of a contentious game between heated rivals Minnesota and UND, you should probably be guarding your grill any time you're within spitting distance of someone named Ben Blood. Regardless, Blood at least kept his integrity. Unlike Di...
Here's CNN Meteorologist Alexandra Steele's Forecast For Today's Chargers-Lions Playoff Game At Ford Field
Consider how many people are involved in the production of a simple weather forecast on CNN. You have the meteorologist, for sure, but you also have the producer who loads the "wx" into the script/rundown, and the graphics techs who run the system that creates what you see on your screen. ...
This Interview With PGA Golfer Matt Every Is A Train Wreck
Matt Every leads the Sony Open in Hawaii by two strokes, but his play is being overshadowed by this bizarre interview with the Golf Channel's Kelly Tilghman in which his 2010 arrest for marijuana possession (and subsequent suspension from the tour) is addressed. Every's defensiveness suggests he w...
This One's For Anyone Who's Ever Wanted To Tell A Sideline Reporter "I Love You, You're So Pretty And Beautiful"
Greg from Lemont, Sarah Kustok from CSN, you two are just about the cutest couple and this isn't creepy at all. Make it happen. [CSN Chicago]...
Kwame Brown's Season Likely Over After He Hurt Himself Fouling Someone
An MRI revealed a torn muscle in his chest, so Brown needs surgery that could keep him sidelined for up to three months. The injury happened Tuesday night when he fouled Udonis Haslem. So goes the No. 1 draft pick's reinvention as an arguably useful defensive stopper. [Marin Independent Journal]...