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The Masters Are Not Back Back Back
The Masters does begin tomorrow morning, at 8 a.m. (So set your alarms!) And, as mentioned last month, it will be telecast on ESPN, minus Chris Berman. We do not envy the exec who had to deliver that news to Boomer....

Your Deadspin Masters Preview
We don't know much about golf, but we do know that The Masters Are Important. Therefore, with the Big Golf Tournament That Doesn't Like Ladies teeing off tomorrow, we asked resident golf impresario Shane Bacon, of Dogs That Chase Cars, to preview it for us. So here goes....

It's Olympic Torch Relay Eve!
I love a good protest as much as the next person, but it seems that the bar has been set impossibly high for my home team, San Francisco. The Olympic Torch Relay makes its only North American appearance here on Wednesday, and because this is San Francisco, the world is expecting a protest on a grand...

About Last Night
What you missed while inventing a bike while drunk ... • College basketball: The free throw, she no go in so good. Kansas 75, Memphis 68, OT. • MLB: Walk-off grand slam? Cooool. Angels 6, Indians 4. • NFL: David Garrard signs seven-year, $60 million deal with Jaguars; will still be 12th quarterback ...

Gen. Petraeus Rocks The Wii Golf
Gen. Petraeus is testifying before Congress tomorrow. As you prepare your notes for his testimony, we ask you to remember his human side, his fun side, his ... Wii golf side. We understand: Sometimes golf can seem like a 100 Years Game to us too....

Olympic Torch Relay Proceeding Smoothly So Far
The Olympic Torch passed through London and Paris on Sunday and earlier today, and was only snuffed out a few times by protesters: Once with a fire extinguisher. There were near riots and close to a hundred arrests. You know, I'm starting to suspect that some people don't like the Olympic Torch....

Jake Peavy Doesn't Have Hand
Before we get to Sunday's action, here's what they're saying about the Jake Peavy spitball controversy from over the weekend ......

Jake Peavy Packed Kenny Rogers' Hand Cream By Mistake
Earlier we told you of Jake Peavy's masterful one-run complete game win over the Los Angeles Dodgers. A reader sent in these "shots of the screen" indicting a smudginess of the index and middle fingers, and possibly the thumb....

Shades Of A Very Expensive 2003
And there it is. The dreaded comparison: "Detroit is 0-5 for the first time since the Tigers dropped their first nine games in 2003 en route to an AL-record 119 losses." For the record, the 2008 Tigers are in no way similar to the 2003 variety, with the exception of players named Brandon Inge, Jerem...

I'm Going To The Olympic Torch Relay ... What Could Possibly Go Wrong?
The San Francisco Board of Supervisors recently announced the route that the Olympic Torch will take through The City this coming Tuesday; a waterfront jaunt beginning at AT&T Park's McCovey Cove and ending at Justin Herman Plaza. Since I'm going to be in that neck of the woods anyway, I'm going to ...

Benny The Bull: Free At Last!
Displaying the kind of investigative moxie that could have kept us out of this whole Iraq mess, the Chicago Sun-Times dug into Thursday's Benny the Bull T-shirt assault story and discovered that Benny had been wrongly accused! On Thursday it was reported that Benny — the costumed mascot for the Bull...

Don't Even THINK About It, Brett
You know, this is gonna come as a shock to you — and we do hope you are sitting down — but apparently Brett Favre (seriously!) turns out (you ready?) to be (here it comes!) thinking of unretiring. We know, right?!...

Stephen Curry's Mom...The Early Years
Davidson fans are overjoyed that guard Stephen Curry will not parlay his NCAA tournament popularity into a lucrative NBA contract. One other perk for school will be that his mother, Sonya, will also be in attendance next year, doing wonders for their national television coverage and alumni associati...

Who Knew Hondas Were So Roomy?
A few weeks ago, there was a message board post about Shaquille O'Neal hopping a ride with a fan (who's apparently named "Donger") from the Suns' parking lot over to his Diesel mobile in the next lot. The veracity of the story was questioned, even though the fan had photographic evidence of the occa...

Benny The Bull Will Put A Cap In Your Ass
When talking about illegal mascot shenanigans, no one, of course, beats the drunken exploits of the Stanford Tree. But running a close second is Benny the Bull, the only NBA mascot with a criminal record for battery on a police officer. On Tuesday he was at it again, shooting the Celtics' Kevin Garn...

Jason Smith Might Be A Little Itchy
According to ex-adult entertainer Mary Carey, Sixers rookie big man Jason Smith was the victim of her spider-monkey-esque make-out session on Monday night. Smith, the Sixers 20th pick in the 2007 draft, has provided playoff-bound Sixers some additional big-man depth off the bench this season but, ac...

Moises Alou's Timing Leaves Much To Be Desired
As has been well documented, if Moises Alou, back in 2003, just slowly jogs away from the left-field wall, no one ever knows who Steve Bartman is, and people can go back to blaming Alex Gonzalez or Mark Prior or whomever they want to blame. (You know, people who actually played.) A few years ago, Al...

Those Proofreading Cubbies
Up until this morning, this was what the new Ernie Banks statue looked like in front of Wrigley Field. Yes, they missed an apostrophe....

Is The Indiana Job Really That Great Of A Gig?
As an Illini fan eager to hammer Indiana at every opportunity, we must admit that we can't find much to mock about the hiring of Tom Crean. The guy's a respected coach, a solid citizen and has a funny name. No arguments there. Except ... why the heck is he leaving Marquette for Indiana?...