ham Page 282 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
BYU's Top Rusher Withdraws, Possibly Due To Premarital Sex With Girlfriend
Harvey Unga, BYU's leading rusher, is withdrawing from school. So is his girlfriend, basketball player Keilani Moeaki. They're leaving because of a violation of BYU's notoriously strict honor code. Let's speculate!...
Forget England's World Cup Hopes; How About Posh And Becks' Sex Life?
Beckham's air cast means he'll have to lie flat in bed, and therefore, according to the papers, not have sex for three months. I fail to see why lying still is an obstacle to this. [Daily Star]...
Vinnie Jones And Becksie To Remake Classic Football Movie!
For those who haven't seen the 1981 football masterpiece, Escape To Victory, you're really missing out on something quite special....
Beckham's Torn Achilles Moves British Poet Laureate To Write Dreadful Verse
"[T]his poem is written," Carol Ann Duffy announces, "to draw a parallel with Achilles, who gave his name to Beckham's injury." Uh-oh....
David Beckham Tears Achilles, Will Miss Opportunity To Vomit On The Field In Another World Cup
Beckham snapped his left achilles and will not get a chance to sit on England's bench in South Africa. Stiff upper lip, though: "The romantic notion of him seizing the day and inspiring England to glory was poppycock." [Guardian]...
Stories That Don't Suck: Axl Rose, Hockey Goons, Cassius Bom-Ba-Ye, Dr. Z In The USSR
Every week, I'll excerpt a handful of stories — old and new, sports and otherwise, relevant and merely sublime — that I urge you to read for one reason or another. Send any suggestions to [email protected]....
This Is Why Bobsledders Keep Their Heads Down
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Say Hey, Wait A Minute
"Above all, the story of Willie Mays reminds us of a time when the only performance-enhancing drug was joy." So sayeth the great Pete Hamill, who is proof that baseball makes even brilliant writers sound like a Wonder Years voiceover....
Steve Alford, Sore Winner: Curses Out Opposing Player
On one hand, you'd like coaches to stop treating players like children. On the other hand, maybe Alford shouldn't be calling college students "assholes" in the handshake line. Especially with a camera two feet away....
Sports Fella Leaves The Yard
OK, what in the name of Ho Chi Minh is Bill Simmons talking about here? Muhammad Ali and 'Nam? Tiger keeping his pecker out of the killing fields of Spearmint Rhino? What?...
Rangers Set For Historic Season - Just Ask Them
Hope springs eternal at Spring Training. But in Rangers camp, someone appears to have spiked the Gatorade with Prozac. Because players are throwing out pie-in-the-sky predictions like no one's business....
Last Night's Winner: Scott Hamilton's Tear Ducts
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Hamilton and everyone else who had themselves another happy cry last night over Joannie Rochette, winner of a bronze medal that looks golden from here....
Golfing While Sick, For Fun And Profit
Henrik Stenson, puking and pooping his guts out, dragged himself on the course to play one hole at the Accenture Match Play Championship, before withdrawing. Why even bother?...
Godwin's Law Strikes The SI Swimsuit Issue
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Binghamton Basketball Was Not A Well-Run Outfit
A $1 million investigation resulting in 102-page report has come to the shocking conclusion that Binghamton—the crime waviest basketball program in D-I—may have lacked "oversight" and "self-inquiry." Also, the Titanic may have lacked "water-tightness." [USAToday/NY Times]...
In Praise Of Team Spicoli
I have a new favorite Olympian, and he is the guy who, when asked yesterday how it feels to be a member of the U.S. snowboarding team, responded with the following bit of bongwater poetry:...
The Super Bowl: Still The Most Important Thing Ever
There's gnashing of teeth in America and self-congratulations in Europe over a report that the Super Bowl is no longer the most popular sporting event on the planet. Not so fast. Let's not count our broadcast shares before they hatch....
Adrian Peterson's Fumbles Caused By French Fry Grease?
An anonymous reader sent us this very interesting photo of Adrian Peterson eating what appears to be a very slippery lunch of seafood and chips....just hours before he dropped the football three times in Sunday's NFC Championship game....
Your NFC Championship Open Thread
Supposedly there are more fellows playing in this game, going by the names of Bush, Peterson, Brees and others. That's not what I hear. All I hear is Favre Favre Favre....
I Hereby Declare NASCAR Not A Sport
Early favorite Denny Hamlin tore his ACL, but will wait until after the season to get surgery and will still race in the meantime. Greg Oden picked the wrong career. [That's Racin']...