hi Page 1129 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Ohio State's D'Angelo Russell Bloodied By Elbow To The Face
Ohio State's D'Angelo Russell took an elbow to the face courtesy of VCU's Doug Brooks while going up for a rebound. Brooks got hit with a flagrant one foul; Russell needed to be cleaned up, but kept playing after the injury....
Tim Howard Kinda Just Chills With His Hands Down, Watches Goal Go In
I know. I know. It was a great goal from Dynamo Kiev's Andriy Yarmolenko. Someone should've, could've stepped to the ball, at some point. Tim Howard probably couldn't have gotten to it anyway. I know. That's all out of the way....
Demetrius Jackson Leads Notre Dame On A Razzle-Dazzle Fast Break
14-seed Northeastern brought the fight to Notre Dame today, but eventually lost 69-65 after crapping away a chance to tie it up in the closing seconds. Before that, though, Notre Dame guard Demetrius Jackson pulled off this slick bit of dribbling and passing on a fast break. So far, this is the high...
Failure To Pay Office Pool Winnings Leads To Sad, Overwrought Email
This overwrought email, sent by the winner of a March Madness office pool to the irresponsible pool administrator who was dragging his or her feet with payouts, comes to us from a tipster who tells us that he dusts it off every March for a good chuckle. We don't blame him....
Kyrie Irving Made Timofey Mozgov's Job Very Easy
Cavs center Timofey Mozgov scored 17 points on 7-of-8 shooting while playing just 17 minutes in last night's rout of the Nets. That's an efficient-ass game! He's got Kyrie Irving, who set up five of those seven made buckets with some beautiful passing, to thank for it....
LeBron James Called This Dwyane Wade Game-Winner
Old Man Dwyane Wade's been on a nice little run lately, averaging nearly 30 points per game over his last seven. He dropped 32 on the Portland Trail Blazers last night, the most important of which came by way of this smooth, game-winning jumper at the tail end of the fourth quarter. The Blazers prob...
Even The Chicago Cubs Are Owning Darren Rovell
You would think that after a career full of attempts at being clever on Twitter backfiring, living BrandBot Darren Rovell would give up the bantering aspect of the platform and stick to reporting on whichever 8,000 calorie food abomination is being introduced in a minor league ballpark near you. B...
Teamwork Is Helping To Hide Your Buddy's Dong While He Pees On The Bench
If you ever wanted to know how close the Sevilla players are with each other, this is your answer....
My Beloved Stuffed Animal Needs A Bath, And I'm A Nervous Wreck
Jolie Kerr is a cleaning expert and advice columnist. She'll be here every week helping to answer your filthiest questions. Are you dirty? Check the Squalor Archive for assistance. Are you still dirty? Email her....
Holy Mother Carlos Tevez Just Bombed Germany With This Rocket Golazo
Juventus and Borussia Dortmund are playing today, right now. A few minutes ago, they kicked off. Then two minutes passed. Then Juventus's Carlos Tevez got the ball. Then he blew up Germany's hopes, and also Germany. No more high-quality vehicles for anyone. Because there's no more Germany. Germany's...
WGN Has Woman Make Sparks With Her Crotch In Front Of Awestruck Kids
This wonderful moment in local news history was broadcast recently on Chicago's WGN. Please note the children in the background....
Chinese Hoops Player Makes Best Highlight, Worst Mistake Of His Life
Han Dejun is a 7-foot-1 center who plays for the Liaoning Flying Leopards in the Chinese Basketball Association. He's huge. In this video, you can see him dunking on Stephon Marbury, who is both old and relatively small, and then nearly hyping his own face off. ...
What Happens When A 38-Year-Old Man Takes An AP History Test?
I never took an AP course in high school. I'm pretty sure it was because I never qualified for it (I went straight B-minuses throughout my high school career), but it was also because I went to school back when taking AP courses wasn't the dire necessity that it is for today's students. According ...
Kyle Turris, Damn
There is still plenty of room on the Senators bandwagon (which you should not board, because it will undoubtedly career off the road and burst into flames with impeccable comedic timing)....
Is This Philip Rivers's Last Year With The Chargers?
That vaunted quarterback class of 2004 will turn 34 this year—right around the age, if you're a good-to-great QB like Ben Roethlisberger, Eli Manning, or Philip Rivers, you get that last longish-term contract to set you for life. Roethlisberger got his extension; Manning's is likely coming soon. But...
Reggie Jackson Is Very Surprised To Learn He Had 20 Assists Tonight
Reggie Jackson really wanted out from Oklahoma City, and with Brandon Jennings sidelined with a ruptured Achilles, he's getting a chance to make a team his own for the first time. Tonight he had his best game as a Piston, scoring an efficient 23 points and dropping 20 dimes in a win over the Grizz...
Read The Full Report On OSU Hockey's "Get Horny For The Puck" Ex-Coach
Ohio State's women's hockey coach, Nate Handrahan, resigned last week after an investigation found he had a history of inappropriate conduct, including sexualized comments, retaliation for anyone raising concerns to the administration, and telling players to "get horny for the puck." Today, Ohio Sta...
No Jokes, Period: A Polite Guy's Guide To A Girl's Time Of The Month
Sometimes the most basic piece of information is also the most helpful, and so, as we begin what I should warn you up front will be a long, intense treatise on this topic, let me tell you this: No two women's periods are alike. Our periods are as unique as we are, which, of course, makes understandi...
Nine Surprises From Unlikely U.S. Marathon Champ Blake Russell
Twenty miles is considered the psychological halfway point in a marathon—quads and hammies are starting to rig, feet are swollen and pulpy, raw skin stings from salty sweat, bodily systems send increasingly frequent and frantic cease-and-desist messages to the brain. The remaining 6.2 miles require ...
