hi Page 1733 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Stadium Capacity Arms Race Is On
Michigan Stadium, opening after renovations, will again be the nation's largest with a capacity of 109,901. They've still got a ways to go to catch Pyongyang's Rŭngrado May Day Stadium, which seats 150,000. [Free Press]...
Ohio Governor Takes His Authoritarian Jackboot Off The Neck Of Live Tiger Mascot
Obie the Massillon tiger is saved! Gov. Ted Strickland announced yesterday he "will ensure the rules allow for the established mascot programs to continue," which means Obie will be free do whatever it is a caged sideline tiger does....
Would You Like To Have Hot Sex With Strangers You Meet On Facebook?
Then you should join the Deadspin Facebook page, which is quickly turning into the world's premiere online orgy. Look at that — more than 7,000 hot and horny people just waiting to Like your stuff. You know you want in....
Toddler Mows Down Referee With Golf Cart
With a 2-year-old child wedged on the pedal, the golf cart careened out of control across a high school football field, leaving bodies in its wake. Well, one body....
Ohio Governor Tramples Small Town's Right To Have A Live Freaking Tiger At High School Football Games
Massillon, Ohio, is under siege from Gov. Ted Strickland and the Humane Society of the United States over the town's tradition of stockpiling tigers for use as mascots during Massillon Washington High School football games. The indignation is palpable!...
Out-Of-Breath Broccoli-Costumed Man Proposes To Lady At Minor League Game
Joining the ranks of the other marriage proposal video we've posted comes this one from a recent Reading Phillies game, where a racing broccoli mascot won both the race and the heart of the fair maiden in the stands. [The 700 Level]...
Brad Lidge Signs A Fake Leg
Here's the Phillies' closer taking the time to sign a prosthetic limb after a recent game. Other players who claim not to have the time to sign for fans? Well, they no longer have a leg to stand on. [Crossing Broad]...
The Beckham Effect, Part Deux
Wondering how Major League Soccer plans to cash in on whatever increased popularity emanates from America's World Cup run? Probably not, because they've been teasing you with it for a while now. What better time than just before kick-off of what may end up being the Game of the Century ... So Far t...
FMK: Ichiro, Werth, Strawberry
I've fielded kyuu or juu tips-emails about this video of Blossoming Young Lady Giddying Up After Ichiro Elbows Her Face, Caresses Her Outer Thigh....
And The Award For Excellence in Parenting, Coaching Goes To ...
By excellence, I mean "providing proof that some human beings aren't fit to parent, coach youth sports or be a parent who coaches his/her/any children in youth sports."...
World Cup Open Thread: Uruguay-Germany
The battle for bronze is here. Can Uruguay salvage a modicum of dignity for South America—and alternately taunt Brazil and Argentina—or will Ze Germans prove too, too hot to handle? Stay in the know and comment along....
Great Moments in White History*
Let the historical record reflect that the first White Man to complete a timed 100-meter race, on foot, in under 10 seconds, was Christophe Lemaitre. In unrelated news, Usain Bolt reportedly keeps looking over his shoulder ... with, like, Hubble binoculars....
Baseball Player Doesn't Apologize For Cursing, Proves Mayans Correct
Father shells out for a pair of $45 front-row pro-baseball tickets thus enabling son to tell friends, "My dad's the greatest in the whole world." Then, fate intervenes. It sends a foul ball into the old man's glove, and an obscenity-fueled line from the hirsute right-fielder's tongue into everybody...
If a Bull Gores Someone in Pamplona When Everybody's Watching Soccer, Does the Wound Bleed?
Not a good weekend for bulls internationally....
What's The Difference Between John Elway And Barbaro?
Let's just get to what you probably want to know about me, Brian Hickey, the new weekend guy: How to throw me down into your basement well with Precious because you get rammy when swaddled in vulnerable soullessness on Saturdays and Sundays....
Annoying Use Of Vuvuzela Throughout History: The Final Chapter
The World Cup ends this weekend, so let's take one last look at cultural and historical milestones being rudely — and humorously — interrupted by that most noble of African horns, the vuvuzela....
Great Moments In Comic Sans History
In light of Dan Gilbert's laudable, laughable open letter to LeBron James, we proudly present an alternate history, in which Comic Sans is the font of choice (complete with needless scare quotes)....
Yes, Dennis Green's Son, Who Apparently Writes For ESPN, Had Some Kiddie Porn On His Computer
I almost typed "kitty porn," which I assume is a lesser charge in Connecticut. Green was also charged with possession of narcotics and drug paraphernalia. He was gonna have quite a party by himself. [Hartford Courant]...
Cleveland Fans React With Usual Grace And Tact
The message boards at CavFanatic, the largest Cavaliers fansite, are currently an apocalyptic wasteland, where not even hope will sprout through the salted earth. Here are some of the best comments, helpfully sorted into three categories:...
Young Fan's Interference Leads To Mariners Loss, Priceless Expressions Of Wounded Innocence
In the eighth inning last night, Russell Branyan hit a chopper down the line that rolled into foul territory and was picked up by a teenager—preventing Ichiro from tying the game. Watch the young man's excitement turn to horror. [MLB.com]...