hi Page 793 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Will Someone Please Befriend These Sad, Lonely People So The Rest Of Us Don't Have To Deal With Them?
Donald Trump is horrible and disgusting, and the menagerie of melting, gelatinous creatures surrounding him are also horrible and disgusting, but they’re not really new. The behavior they’ve exhibited over the last three years came into focus, in Facebook and before long silences at family dinners, ...
Simone Biles Wins Her First World Title On Vault And Breaks World Championships Gold Medal Record
This might be difficult to believe, but up until today Simone Biles had never won a world championship gold medal on the vault. ...
Roger Federer Put This Serve Directly Into The Garbage Can
Roger Federer has cut an unusual path into the fourth round at Paris: he played just two sets of tennis to get there. He had a first-round bye, then second-round opponent Milos Raonic withdrew from the tournament, and then he defeated the sleepy pirate Fabio Fognini, 6-4, 6-3. So all of a sudden, a ...
Let's Remember Some Candidates: 1992 Election Card Guys
Where Wild Card’s set of trading cards for the 1992 presidential election is concerned, the question is less how the set came to be than why. The how part is easy: Given a smallish photo budget, a sufficiently defective sense of judgment, and no meaningful pressure to sell any of the cards, a compan...
Bol Bol Is Almost Here
Bol Bol is not your average 7-foot-2 basketball player. He is not awkward, not stiff, not gangly. He does not succeed solely on his height—though it certainly helps. He is mobile, and he is athletic, and he is offensive-minded. Physically, his body can’t help but remind you of his famous father. But...
Nick Mullens Kicked Ass And Then Cried And It Was Awesome
Perhaps it was giving too much credit to a pathetic Oakland Raiders squad to have thought that 49ers quarterback Nick Mullens, who started last night’s game despite never having taken a snap in regular-season NFL action, was going to have a hard time. But even though it came against a team as lifele...
Oh Man, De'Aaron Fox Is So Much Fun
De’Aaron Fox spent his Thursday night leading the plucky Kings to a dominant road win in Atlanta. I do not expect you to take that very seriously! There are data points you mark in the The Kings Might Be Good column—a 6–3 record; road wins over the Thunder and Heat; a five-game winning streak; offen...
Patrik Laine Came Home And Scored A Hat Trick
Winnipeg Jets wonderkid Patrik Laine has had a bit of a slow start to his third NHL season, earning just five points in his first 12 games and going scoreless in his last five. But a return to his home country of Finland, for a game this afternoon against the Panthers, seems to have jump-started the...
Scottish Soccer Fan Punches Goalkeeper In The Face, While Another Beans Manager With A Coin
The behavior of two asshole fans threatened to ruin the spectacle of yesterday’s Scottish Premiership match between rivals Hearts and Hibernian. One of the assholes punched Hearts’ keeper in the face in the middle of the match, and the other chucked a coin at Hibs’ manager, striking the coach square...
Chris Simms Recalls The Time Vince Wilfork Busted Up His Genitals Real Good
Former NFL quarterback Chris Simms, who famously got his spleen exploded during a game, went on Mike Florio’s radio show today and shared the story of a different time in which he was grievously and spectacular injured by a big hit....
Sorry, Sorry, It's The Election Deadcast
First things first: yes, the Live Deadcast at Headquarters Beercade in Nashville next Monday is indeed happening on the day before election day. Yes, many or most or nearly all of us will be somewhat stressed out as a result of this. And yes, while we’re doing this, pledges made in blog posts are wo...
Former Player Says "Insane" Prep School Coach Mike Woodbury Used To Call Teenage Female Players "Sperm Banks"
Following the publication of an audio recording in which prep school basketball coach Mike Woodbury said, “I’m gonna fuck you in your ass” to one of his former players, other people who played for Woodbury in the past are coming forward with their own stories of his abusive behavior....
What Will It Take To Get Jim Jordan Out Of Congress?
LIMA, Ohio — Within five minutes of meeting Janet Garrett’s campaign team for the first time, I’m asked to help with their speaker set-up. The laptop audio playing the Spotify playlist is coming out of the projector, and they don’t know how to hook it up to the main speaker, where it would be louder...
Spencer Dinwiddie Inspired To Greatness By "Hoodie Kermit"
Spencer Dinwiddie scored 13 points after about the three-minute mark of the fourth quarter of Brooklyn’s Wednesday night win over the Pistons, including a four-point play, two clutch game-tying threes, and the eventual overtime game-winner. It was a virtuosic finish for a fun and underrated player:...
Who Needs Jimmy Butler When You've Got Uhh Derrick Rose
The Timberwolves held Jimmy Butler out of their Halloween home game against the Utah Jazz, for honestly who knows what reason. Shams says it’s part of “a six-week-long process aimed at getting the All-Star out of Minnesota.” Woj says it was for rest. Either way, the Jazz are tough customers, and sit...
Christian Pulisic Went Off Today
An update on Christian Pulisic, American superstar: he is still extremely good at soccer. Today, in a DFB Pokal win over Union Berlin, he had a goal, an assist, a drawn game-winning penalty, and whatever this shit this move was. ...
Prep School Coach Doesn't Regret Saying "I'm Gonna Fuck You In Your Ass" To Player He Called "Retarded"
An audio recording began making its way around the internet yesterday, which purported to be a conversation between Mike Woodbury, who runs a private school called Nation Christian Academy in Florida, and a former basketball player at the school named Marvens Petion....
How Long Can The Sixers Experiment With Markelle Fultz?
The Philadelphia 76ers are now 4-4 after last night’s 129-112 loss to the Toronto Raptors, which counts as something of a disappointing start for a team that roared through the second half of last season to finish 52-30. Last year’s Sixers finished the season with the fourth-best net rating in the l...
The Browns Are Being The Browns
Happy Halloween from Emergency Football Show Weekly! This week Dom and I discuss the Browns’ coaching changes, why morning NFL games are so great (Dom—and West Coasters—may disagree), Michael Dickson’s fourth-down run and Todd Gurley’s decision to go down before scoring a touchdown. Enjoy!...