hi Page 827 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Alex Ovechkin Is On Pace For Yet Another 50-Goal Season
Alexander Ovechkin took over the NHL lead in goals with a late pair, the first tying a sloppy, high-scoring game, and the second giving Washington the 5-4 OT win in Carolina. “It’s almost like whenever he decides to end it,” said his linemate Devante Smith-Pelly,” he can just go do it.”...
<i>Jeopardy!</i> Is A Harsh Mistress
Nick Spicher was embroiled in the Jeopardy! equivalent of an NFL replay review when he gave an incorrect response to the following before/after clue in Monday’s episode: “A song by Coolio from ‘Dangerous Minds’ goes back in time to become a 1667 John Milton classic.”...
Some More Things That Should Die In 2018
Last week, we ran staffers’ nominations for shitty things of 2017 that should stay in 2017. Because we are bad at organization, we left out some things. Here they are....
Futsal Kid Scores Penalty, Hits Three Pointer, Causes Mass Hysteria All In One Move
This young man kicking a ball past the keeper and into the net while also kicking his shoe up and through the nearby basketball hoop is the apex of simultaneous multi-sport excellence—which his stunned and elated buddies react to appropriately by losing their minds:...
Christian Pulisic Rings In The New Year With A Powerful And Absolutely Legit Slam Dunk
Christian Pulisic—the wonderteen, the nation’s best and most favored soccer man, an elite athlete blessed with speed and agility and hops we don’t normally associate with slight, diminutive whiteboys—had himself a (mostly) great 2017. To commemorate his metaphorical ascent to the heights of the spor...
If The UFC Wants Conor McGregor To Defend His Belt, They Should Pay Up<em></em>
What’s your favorite Conor McGregor title defense? Since catching Eddie Alvarez reaching a few days after the 2016 election to nab the lightweight championship, the Irishman hasn’t fought in the UFC. He earned the featherweight belt in 2015 by unhooking Jose Aldo’s jaw in 13 seconds, but the UFC re-...
Bad Quarterback Performance Of The Week: Kirk Cousins Is Cold And Wants To Go Home
Welcome to Bad Quarterback Performance Of The Week, a recurring feature in which we celebrate the worst quarterback play the NFL has to offer....
Polish Skier Finishes Downhill Race On A Single Ski
Pawel Babicki finished 67th out of 67 competitors at a downhill race last week in Bormio, Italy. He trailed eventual winner Dominik Paris by 36 seconds, which is all the more impressive considering that Babicki lost his left ski before the halfway point of the famous Stelvio downhill run....
319-Pound Defensive Lineman Da'Ron Payne Gets Interception, Catches TD Pass In Five-Minute Span
Alabama’s Da’Ron Payne pushes well past 300 pounds and bench presses 500. He is a large man. Here’s the large man catching two passes in five minutes—one of them from his own team, for a touchdown—and making us all very happy to be alive. Except for those of us who went to Clemson, and I didn’t go t...
Georgia Beats Oklahoma In Double-OT; Here's How The Winning Score Sounded Around The World
Sony Michel’s touchdown in double-overtime gave Georgia a 54-48 Rose Bowl win over Oklahoma and made up for a late fumble that resulted in six points for the Sooners. Here are how both teams’ radio announcers as well as national and international broadcasters called the winning touchdown:...
I Can't Stop Watching These Buffalo Bills Celebration Videos
The Bills on Sunday ended an 18-year playoff drought, the longest active postseason dry spell in major U.S. sports. Understandably, Bills players and fans were pretty stoked. Some of this cathartic merriment was caught on video, and the spontaneity and genuine joy of it all makes for some fine hango...
What Horrible Things Did We Do To Our Penises Last Year?<em></em>
If Christmas is all about putting stuff up butts, New Year’s Day is the day to read about the many methods of absolute destruction of America’s dick and balls, and to be thankful it wasn’t you. Unless it was....
Ravens WR Chris Moore's Excruciating Bobble Turns Into A Bengals Pick-Six<em></em>
Despite the worst efforts of Joe Flacco, who went 4 of 18 for just 28 yards in the first half, the Ravens are actually trying to make the playoffs by beating the Bengals today. It’s proving to be extremely difficult, and Darqueze Dennard made the task even harder by stealing a catch away from Chris ...
Alvin Kamara Almost Didn't Run Out This 106-Yard Kickoff Return TD
The Saints’ Alvin Kamara—the most fun surprise of the NFL season—appeared to have some second thoughts about taking out his first touch of the game on the Bucs’ kickoff. It’s a good thing he didn’t take the touchback, though, because once he got up a head of steam Kamara just blew straight through a...
Donnie Jones Puts On A Show Before Punting
If you haven’t noticed by the ice forming in your water glasses, it’s very cold up north and out east today, and it’s messing with at least a few NFL players. One of them was Eagles punter Donnie Jones, who went out to punt while still wearing his warm-ups, then had to treat fans to a little show....
Vikings Fall For A Bears Trick Punt Return
A few trick plays have been some of the only highlights of this otherwise poor Bears season, and Chicago sprinkled in another one for their final game of the year. On a punt return against the Vikings, the Bears pulled off the always-satisfying decoy punt return, with Tarik Cohen serving as the bait...
Washington Announcer Bob Rondeau Ended His Career With A Humble Final Sign-Off
Thirty-seven years after he first began calling Huskies games, Washington radio announcer Bob Rondeau signed off from his final broadcast in a characteristically low-key fashion....
Anthony Davis Turned Ron Baker Into Flying Shrapnel
The Knicks narrowly prevailed over the Pelicans last night in New Orleans, but not without great sacrifice. Ron Baker, blue-collar reserve guard, fell in the line of duty attempting a foolhardy contest of a driving Anthony Davis dunk:...
Chicago's Young Big Men Rule So Hard Right Now
Break up the damn Bulls! Three NBA teams have won eight of their last 10 games, and two of those teams are the Golden State Warriors and the Oklahoma City Thunder, a couple of superstar-laden superteams. The Bulls are the third team, and the Bulls are led in total minutes by Justin friggin’ Holiday....
C'mon, Nobody Deserves That
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