hi Page 893 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Kenjon Barner Pulls Jaylen Watkins Away From The Football Like It’s A Grenade
The 9-1 Eagles are beating up on the 3-7 Bears today, leading 24-0 at halftime. But the smartest play of the day goes to Kenjon Barner. ...
Report: Tennessee Football Gives Up Completely, Hauls Greg Schiano Out Of The Dumpster<em></em>
The Tennessee Volunteers just finished their worst season—at least by total wins—since 1977, going 4-8 with zero victories in SEC play. Naturally, this meant that head coach Butch Jones was out on his ass before the season even ended, replaced by interim coach and Michigan failure Brady Hoke. But wi...
Mohamed Sanu Throws 50-Yard TD Strike To Julio Jones
Third-and-one in the first half isn’t usually the time to reach deep into the bag of tricks, but the Atlanta Falcons clearly trust wideout Mohamed Sanu to get them all the yards they need, and then some. With the ball at midfield, they had Sanu take a shotgun snap and fire a pass deep down the field...
Is Alex Ovechkin DUN DUN DUN ... A Russian Agent?
Seeking to explain why Alex Ovechkin started the PutinTeam “social movement” earlier in the fall, a trio of Washington Post reporters went long on the Ovechkin-Putin bromance, and the genesis of Ovechkin’s PutinTeam launch. It’s a sprawling piece of work that explores both the origins and the effect...
Urban Meyer Says A "Guy With A Camera" Injured J.T. Barrett's Knee During Pregame Warmups
Senior quarterback J.T. Barrett exited yesterday’s Ohio State win over Michigan with an apparent knee injury in the 3rd quarter, but according to OSU coach Urban Meyer, the blame for that injury doesn’t lie with any Michigan defensive player. Instead, Meyer said an unidentified cameraman knocked Bar...
My Fellow Americans, I Regret To Inform You That Our Idiot President Is Being Owned Again
Yes, our dingus mingus of a President said something dumb and wrong, and once again he is being owned online for it. This time, in an effort to protect his image from the indignity of, umm, not being on the cover of one specific issue of one specific magazine, he made some shit up about “actually, I...
Oh Great, Now John Wall's Knee Is An Issue, This Is Just Fucking Great
The top of the NBA’s Eastern Conference is a little deeper than most observers expected it to be before the season. The Celtics are kicking everyone’s ass. The Pistons are good. The Cavs are becoming good. The Raptors are their usual good selves. Teams like the Pacers and 76ers and Heat and Bucks an...
Chip Kelly Will Replace Jim Mora As Head Coach At UCLA
Chip Kelly has been quite the prize these last couple of weeks, as he’s been courted for vacant head coaching positions at Tennessee, Florida, and UCLA. Kelly reportedly turned down Tennessee, and was said to be choosing between Florida and UCLA last week. Word came Thursday that Kelly was suddenly ...
We Have A Contender For Worst Play Of The Season
Son, we recruited you to Western Kentucky to do one thing: punt the football. And you’ve done a hell of a job of punting that football this season. But what you did right here tonight, well, you did everything that wasn’t punting a football....
Washington's Shitty Turf Is Hurting The Team Again
It’s been almost four years since Washington’s slap-dick field cost them Robert Griffin III’s knee, and possibly career. Somehow, they are still letting things like happen:...
Hello Darkness, My Old Friend
Boy, things sure are looking up for Jerry Jones! Here he is enjoying a Thanksgiving feast of a 28-6 loss and 434 passing yards allowed. Look upon his soul, or what is left of it:...
Antoine Griezmann Smacked In A Very Pretty Bicycle Kick Golazo
Atlético Madrid face an uphill battle to qualify for the next round of the Champions League, and though they have a slim chance to advance, they put their best foot forward today, beating Roma 2-0. Antoine Griezmann, who hadn’t scored for Atleti since September, banged in the opener by going all ups...
Larry Nassar Pleads Guilty To Sexual Abuse
Just one day after 2012 Olympic all-around champion Gabby Douglas said that former USA Gymnastics doctor Larry Nassar had sexually abused her during her athletic career, Nassar pleaded guilty to seven counts of criminal sexual conduct in Michigan....
I Saw The Buttfumble Live And It Fractured My Family<em></em>
Sometime in the winter of 2010, my dad sat my younger brother and me down for a talk....
Mike Leach Has Some Wedding Advice For All You Men Out There
A reporter who is getting married in a few days asked Washington State head coach Mike Leach if he had any wedding advice to share with him, and this is what he got:...
Roberto Firmino's No-Look Goal Is Cold As Hell
Now this is just about as cheeky as it gets:...
Ray Allen Says He Was Catfished By Man, Who Claims Allen's A Stalker
The day after a man named Bryant Coleman told a Florida court that he’s being stalked by Ray Allen, the former NBA player has responded with an emergency motion saying that he, in fact, is the one being stalked by Coleman. Their contact began, Allen said, after Coleman catfished him by pretending to...
Teenage Giant Bol Bol Commits To Oregon
Because of his beloved famous father, Manute, and his own similarly pronounced height, Bol Bol has been on the national radar since he was a 6-foot-5 middle schooler, casually blocking the shots of normal pubescent boys. Now, the now 7-foot-1 high school senior has chosen to commit to the University...
Joel Embiid Has Perfected Shit-Talking
Joel Embiid didn’t have the kind of monster game we’ve grown accustomed to seeing during last night’s win over the Jazz—his 15 points and 11 rebounds were perfectly solid—but he did provide the highlight of the game....
Bill Belichick: Thank God We Made It Out Of Mexico City Without Any Earthquakes Or Volcano Eruptions
Bill Belichick wasn’t so thrilled about the Patriots’ game last weekend in Mexico City, which is fair enough—at an altitude of nearly 7,500 feet (more than 2,000 feet higher than Denver), playing in Mexico City can present some unique challenges. Fine! But rather than sticking to that point in a rad...