hi Page 915 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Humorless Dickhole Business Writer Very Upset About March Madness Pools<em></em>
As much as we here at Deadspin like to poke fun at sportswriters and political hot-take artists, the truth is that business journalists may be the lowliest scum of all. We’re all horrified by Darren Rovell, and yet there’s only ONE of him in sports. Really, that man is just a business reporter in sp...

Joel Embiid Is Probably Headed For Another Surgery
According to ESPN’s Marc Stein, Philadelphia 76ers center Joel Embiid is “very likely” to have surgery to repair a partially torn meniscus in his left knee....

The Two Cinderellas Of Indian Wells Have An Early Dance In Miami
Of all the reasons Yoshihito Nishioka’s Indian Wells run to the fourth round felt like the high point of the tournament, the obvious was that he stands just 5-foot-7 in a game of bigs. Even if you knew nothing about the sport, your eyes told you he was an underdog. The 21-year-old came in unheralded...

Soccer Player Who Thanked Both Wife And Girlfriend After Game Digs Hole Deeper
South African Premier League player Mohammed Anas told on himself last week, when he thanked his wife and his girlfriend in a postgame interview. He has since tried to explain himself, and he didn’t do a very good job....

White Sox Option Adam Engel To Triple-A
The Chicago White Sox, who have spent much of the spring evaluating center fielders, are that much closer to making what will certainly be a tough choice today, as 25-year-old Adam Engel, a candidate for the job, has been optioned to the team’s AAA affiliate in Charlotte. The team announced the tran...

We Got Jim Harbaugh’s Itemized Expenses And They’re Kind Of Lame<em></em><em></em>
We all know big boy Jim Harbaugh loves a tall glass of whole milk. Questions remain. Some, like How much does he love milk? are perhaps unanswerable. Others, though, like How much does the highest-paid public employee in the state of Michigan’s milk lust cost taxpayers?, aren’t. In an attempt to fin...

Raptors Finally Defeat Bulls, Ending One Of The NBA's Weirdest Streaks
After overcoming a 16-point lead, four threes from career 30 percent three-point shooter Rajon Rondo, and 37 points from Jimmy Butler, the Toronto Raptors beat the Chicago Bulls tonight. It took them 122 points and five minutes of overtime to do so, but for the first time in 12 matchups, the Raptors...

Italian Soccer Guy Playing In England Misses Pasta And The Sun
Italy’s Andrea Ranocchia joined Premier League stragglers Hull City this season, hoping to work his way back on to the Italian national team. In the meantime, he’s doing his best to adjust to life in England, but there a couple things from Italy he really misses. Namely, pasta and sunshine. ...
![Serge Ibaka And Robin Lopez Throw Actual Punches At Each Other [Update]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/kjizuhzyaztnme1daxqd.jpg)
Serge Ibaka And Robin Lopez Throw Actual Punches At Each Other [Update]
A chest-to-chest staring match in the NBA actually popped off into a real actual fight tonight. The Raptors and Bulls don’t like each other, and in the third quarter with the Bulls up big, Serge Ibaka and Robin Lopez got into it after Jimmy Butler nailed a jumper. Unlike most other incidents where p...

The Latest Evidence That Vince Carter Is An Ageless Wonder
Vince Carter just turned 40, yet he’s still playing 24 minutes per game for the Grizzlies and has recently joined the starting lineup as Memphis lurches down the stretch. His 18th season hasn’t been short of cool highlights, and this evening, he drained a half-court shot before casually dunking it b...

Internecine Broadcast Conflict Breaks Out During Pirates Spring Training Game
During today’s spring training game between the Pirates and Rays, the Pirates broadcast team decided to try a fun experiment. The TV and radio color commentators (Steve Blass, Bob Walk, and John Wehner) would handle the TV broadcast, while the guys who usually do play-by-play on the radio (Joe Block...

Dwight Howard Used To Consume A Truly Shocking Amount Of Candy
There are plenty of amusing details in Baxter Holmes’s ESPN piece about the NBA’s love of PB&Js, but one anecdote about Dwight Howard’s health in 2013 overhauled my understanding of what the human body can do....

Jim Harbaugh Freakin' Loves Twitter
Michigan head coach Jim Harbaugh sat down with GQ to talk about peanut butter, treating his eight-year-old kids like his football players, and some other stuff—you can read the full interview here. What really jumped out from the piece, though, was the fact that the Wolverines head coach really, rea...

Mario Balotelli Missed Start Of Match Because He Tied His Shoes Too Tight
Mario Balotelli’s blistering start to his career in Nice has cooled off some of late. No doubt eager to get back to scoring ways, Balotelli tied his boots nice and tight before stepping out onto the field against Nantes this weekend. Only he soon realized he’d tied them too tight and had to get a co...

White Sox Sign Tim Anderson To Long-Term Deal
The Chicago White Sox have signed promising 23-year-old shortstop Tim Anderson to a six-year contract extension. Colleen Kane of the Chicago Tribune has the details:...

I Can't Stop Watching This Video Of Infuriating Fuck-Ups<em></em>
You know how when you’re scrolling through Facebook, and you happen upon one of those top-down videos that shows a pair of hands creating some sort of delicious food or craft, and then you get stuck watching it for three or four minutes, not because you are especially interested in how to make pinea...

High School Football Coach Suspended After He Allegedly Put His Dick In A Hot Dog Bun And Showed Players
A high school football coach in Spokane, Wash., has been suspended with pay while the school investigates complaints that he exposed himself to students at a leadership camp last summer. According to public records describing the allegations, which were obtained by local news organizations, the coac...

Bastian Schweinsteiger Becomes Latest Old Guy To Head For MLS<em></em>
Three years ago, Bastian Schweinsteger was on top of the soccer world. He was starting for the best club and national teams in the world, winning the Champions League for Bayern Munich in 2013 and the World Cup for Germany in 2014. The do-it-all midfielder won eight Bundesliga titles with Bayern and...

War Machine Found Guilty On 29 Of 34 Charges Of Violence And Sexual Assault
A Las Vegas jury found former MMA fighter War Machine (born Jon Koppenhaver) guilty today on 29 charges for when he brutally beat ex-girlfriend Christy Mack and her male friend Corey Thomas back in 2014. The jury deliberated for a day and a half before finding War Machine guilty of most of the charg...

John Elway Writes Letter Endorsing Supreme Court Nominee, For Some Reason
There are a great many topics on which one might seek the wisdom of former Hall-of-Fame quarterback and current Broncos GM John Elway. For instance: how to throw a football real far, or how to avoid paying a shit-ton of money to a bad QB just because he can throw a football real far....