horse-racing Page 15 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
On Your Marks ... Get Set ... Shuffle!
On Friday, we told you about Extreme Day, a horse racing promotional event that featured skateboarding, clockwise (backwards) racing and, our favorite, jockey races. (Complete with gates!)...
Short People In Riding Pants Running
Because nothing amuses us like jockeys, here's a neat — if not necessarily new — promotion they're trying at Calder Race Course this weekend: A jockey race! Because nothing's more compelling that five-foot-tall guys sprinting....
Quick! Time To Save Barbaro Again!
Apparently, there aren't enough children writing letters: Barbaro is in serious trouble....
Ride, Jesse, Ride
We had a crazy, fantastical dream last night. In our fevered slumber, we dreamed that the Rev. Jesse Jackson had teamed with the former agent to Dennis Rodman to represent The Jockeys' Guild. Thats what we get for eating Laotain food just before bedtime. Thankfully, we got a good night's rest, and...
Barbaro Finally Responds To Fans
As we have widely documented extensively and in excruciating detail, all kinds of gentle-hearted simps have been sending letters to the injured Barbaro over the last few months....
So, How Is That Horse Anyway?
For those of you who were wondering how everyone's favorite non-sentient being was going in his quest to survive long enough to have sex with any horse in sight, the Associated Press has a full report on jockey Edgar Prado visiting the horse in the hospital today....
What Being "Put Out To Stud" Can Really Mean
As recovering horse Barbaro continues to rake in the get-well cards and well-wishes from somewhat bewildering "fans," we take a moment to look at what being "put out to stud" really means. If Barbaro does survive all this, we all have an image of Barbaro spending his golden years humping around, b...
Letters To Barbaro
As BarbaroMania sweeps the nation like a crazy horse tsunami, we pause to pay tribute to our army of commenters, who were in top form on Wednesday. Your messages to Barbaro were, um, at once inspiring and disturbing: "Get up. WE'RE RUNNING OUT OF TIME. — Jack Bauer, 35; Los Angeles, CA, USA, soon ...
You Don't Bring Me Apples, Anymore ...
OK, we'll admit it; we wrote a letter to Barbaro. Dear Babs: Get well soon, you big, crazy ungulate mammal. Sorry you got hurt, and also for breeding you with legs like chopsticks. Our bad. Well, see ya. Yeah, like you haven't written. Sure. Have you seen New Bolton Center, the hospital in Kennett...
They Shoot Theismann, Don't They?
The news appears to be improving for Barbaro, the Kentucky Derby winner who went down during the Preakness with a broken hind leg. Not since that Joe Theisman video did we recoil quite so much during a sporting event (we were all sad when they had to shoot Joe in the lockerroom afterwards, weren't...
Barbaro Cheats; Injures Leg; Will Be Served Later With Fried Rice
The Preakness has come to an end, and there was very little drama involved in determining that there will not be a Triple Crown winner this year. Barbaro jumped out of the gate early and tried to get a head start. He had to be calmed a little bit, and they got him back in the gate. When they start...
We Now Pause For This Short (Ahem) Announcement
We have a lot of respect for jockeys, especially considering the dangerous nature of their sport, and the raw deal they seem to be getting from track owners. But when we saw this story, we had to giggle a little bit. Come on, we're not made of stone. It seems that several jockeys got into a physi...