hp Page 101 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Golfing While Sick, For Fun And Profit
Henrik Stenson, puking and pooping his guts out, dragged himself on the course to play one hole at the Accenture Match Play Championship, before withdrawing. Why even bother?...

Today's Phrase That Pays: "Hockey Taliban"
Comparing overly loyal hockey fans to vile religious dictators should probably not cause any problems for the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette's Bob Smizik. Seriously, those people are capable of anything! (Hockey fans, I mean.) [Post-Gazette; guy who is not Taliban via]...

Cum On Feel The Poise
Mark Sanchez threw for 100 yards and a pick yesterday, but he also managed not to light himself on fire or dance the hoochie coochie at midfield, so once again everyone has termed his performance — sigh — poised....

Poise To Men
Mark Sanchez went 12-for-15 and threw for 182 yards in his first playoff victory, and because at no point during the game did he chuck the ball into the Ohio or crap himself, he was deemed a model of poise....

Bad Beats: And A Child Shall Lead You
Your weekly gambling column, featuring smart plays, oddball propositions, all your tales of woe — plus, betting advice from a 13-year-old boy! Send your stories to [email protected]. Subject: Bad beats....

NHL Games Get Dirty Dirtier
Who says characterless arenas don't have home field advantage? Thanks to lasers and "lost" replays, Vancouver and Pittsburgh have been able to get a leg up on the competition...

Mark Sanchez: One Of The Poise, Again
"Mark Sanchez's teammates and coaches have noticed something different about him recently," Rich Cimini writes. "They've seen more poise than before..." It's back! [New York Daily News]...

John McCain is Pursuing His Hobbies in His Old Age
Apparently John McCain is a really big boxing fan to the point where HBO wanted him to "mediate the drug testing dispute" between Manny Pacquiao and Floyd Mayweather Jr. Can I start hoping for Sarah Palin as ring girl? [ESPN]...

Sissies, Drunk Yoga And The Last Pure Football Game: A Dispatch From Harvard-Yale
Deadspin correspondent Craig Fehrman went to the 126th edition of Harvard-Yale, where he confronted both the overwrought mythology of The Game and the overexposure of at least one penis....

Last Night's Winner: Josh Pastner
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Memphis coach Josh Pastner, who didn't even win! Don't think that won't stop him from becoming college basketball's new golden boy....

Farm Poise
At last, we have someone to fill the void left by Mark Sanchez roughly seven interceptions ago. Meet James Vandenberg, Iowa's starting quarterback and America's new avatar of poise....

Pittsburgh Fandom Is A Very Sparkly Fandom
Do you know what a Blingee is? I hope not, because these obscenely garish animated gifs are only used by 13-year-old girls on their Geocities pages...or by Penguins fans. [DC Sports Bog]...

SEC Refs Are Afraid Of Technology. Like, 1990s Technology.
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Where The Poise Aren't
Poiserback Mark Sanchez tossed five interceptions in the Jets' 16-13 loss to the Bills yesterday and, more importantly, recorded just one "poise" in the next day's papers — and that in reference to his team's overall lack of the stuff....

Microwaving Poop Lands Canadian Football Players In Deep Doo-Doo
If there's one thing my grandfather told me that I have always held on to was when he said, "Don't put shit inside something you use to heat food that you intend to eat." But Gramps always got sayings wrong....

Good Ol' Poise
What have we here? Two young, relatively unformed quarterbacks who play efficiently enough in winning efforts to be anointed with hollow praise? And they're going head-to-head? America had a poisegasm yesterday — and perhaps found a new talisman of poise....

It's Always Bitey In Philadelphia
We're still trying to sort out what went down, but it looks like Kris Letang's hand got a little too close to Scott Hartnell's mouth. He might want to get tested for rabies....

The Lost Poise
Mark Sanchez threw three picks in yesterday's loss to the Saints, and on the season he has five interceptions against four touchdowns, all of which means that sportswriters must now address the grave matter of Sanchez's inexplicable lack of poise....

Your Depressing Pirates Story For The Day
Pittsburgh farmhand Eric Hacker finally made his major league debut last week at PNC Park, a nice moment for which one lone fan applauded. One. And now the fan's been found. Fittingly, he writes horror novels....
