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The Piggyback Bandit Has Struck Again
Sherwin Shayegan, aka the Piggyback Bandit, hasn't been seen or heard from since his summer star-turn, which culminated with this exhaustive account of his sad adventures by Grantland's Bryan Curtis. But earlier this week, Shayegan was back at it after a basketball game at a midwestern junior colleg...
![Live Los Angeles Police Standoff Features Suspect Doing Whippit After Whippit [UPDATE: Video Highlights]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
Live Los Angeles Police Standoff Features Suspect Doing Whippit After Whippit [UPDATE: Video Highlights]
This is amazing. A slow-speed Los Angeles car chase that began as a DUI pursuit appears to have stalled, as the suspect sits in his car, filling up balloon after balloon from a canister, then inhaling the contents. He's surrounded by police with guns drawn....

Remembering Up With People: The Gayish Quasi-Cult That Invented The Super Bowl Halftime Show
Originally published in Bloomberg View...

Here's A Couple Soccer Fans Pretending To Hump Each Other Behind A Live Deadline Day Report On Sky Sports News
Ahh, Deadline Day. In the U.S., trade deadlines, while occasionally exciting, invite only boring coverage of executives answering telephones. Not so in the U.K., where live reports from outside the grounds of Premiership teams invite supporters and hooligans to gather 'round for the latest transfe...

Liquor Store Owner Shot In Eye During Robbery Says The Rock Beating CM Punk Ruined His Week
This has made the rounds a little, but it's new to us. The man in the video is Tom Dotterer, who's known around Syracuse, N.Y., as the 77-year-old baseball coach at Christian Brothers Academy and the longtime owner of Salina Liquors and Wine. He gained additional notoriety last week when he was sh...

This Wayne Rooney Scarf Looks An Awful Lot Like Hitler
Manchester United increased their standing atop the Premiership ladder thanks to a 2-1 win over Southampton yesterday driven by a Wayne Rooney brace that brought fans at Old Trafford to their feet, if they weren't already upon them....

Tom Brady's New House Literally Has A Moat
Above, Tom Brady's new $20 million California home, which, besides being sunken into what looks like an un-traversable valley, also has a moat—literally, a moat. You can't really see it from the above angle because the massive house is blocking our view, but here's another view, where you can the m...

Jerome Lane's Backboard-Smashing Dunk Was 25 Years Ago Today
Like any other 12-year-old in Western Pennsylvania whose favorite television program was any game involving any teams from The Old Big East, I was captivated by Pitt basketball in 1988. But the biggest memory—and biggest regret—I have of Jerome Lane’s dunk is that I missed watching it live....

Rich Golfer Phil Mickelson Is Going To Take "Drastic" Action To Escape His Imaginary Tax Burden
This past weekend, wealthy golfer Phil Mickelson took some time during a press conference to express his displeasure with the current federal and state tax codes. Like Gerard Depardieu, Mickelson finds the burden of being a multi-multimillionaire in a confiscatory socialist political system too muc...

Soccer Fans' Chant At Player Who Temporarily Left Match During Play: "He Went For A Shit"
During Monday night's 0-0 English Premier League draw between Everton and Southampton, Southampton midfielder Jason Puncheon briefly left the pitch during the action and vanished into the tunnel, only to return a short time later. Upon his return, the hometown fans eloquently serenaded Puncheon wi...

Here's A Woman Who Claims She's Dashon Goldson's Aunt Cursing And Screaming Incoherently On Live Television
Hat tip to ol' Diamond Joe on this one, from the NFC Championship Game postgame show today on KTTV, L.A.'s Fox affiliate. This segment was actually considerably longer than you see here, and includes several more minutes of ill-advised drunken fan interviews. But here's the best part: a woman clai...

NBC's NHL Promo Tries To Rewrite Last Season's Playoff Results
The Flyers beat the Penguins in the first round of the playoffs last year, yet it wasn't as simple as that. The teams combined for 56 goals, hundreds of penalty minutes, and multiple suspensions. It was simultaneously the ugliest and most entertaining playoff series in recent member. But the Flyer...

How To Make Shrimp Linguine: A Guide For Lovers
Look. Wonderful as these foodstuffs are, it's not all pot roasts and chili and disturbingly alien holiday candies out there in the world of eating; nor should it be in your kitchen. Sometimes you're not looking to spend all day slow-cooking some large quantity of rich, meaty food to serve to a lot o...

Angry Cowboys Fan Fills Washing Machine With Explosives, Fires Rifle At It Just To Blow Up Tony Romo Jersey
Courtesy our friends over at the Dallas Observer, here's an example of the sort of responsible gun ownership we've come to expect from the Lone Star State. As a reaction to the Cowboys' disappointing season, one Dallas fan decided to "Get the shit off my Romo jersey" by sticking it in a washing ma...

Georgia Tech's Rod Sweeting Wins Sun Bowl MVP Honors, Immediately Utters "Sheeeeeiiit" On CBS
Georgia Tech cornerback Rod Sweeting dominated a USC offense uninterested in making the Sun Bowl competitive, earning his way to the bowl's MVP honors. The televised trophy presentation led to CBS's Tracy Wolfson demanding a few words from Sweeting, but his first one—left to reverberate against th...

Philly Motorist Finds Snow-Drawn Penis With His Parking Ticket
As anyone who's ever tried street-parking a car in Center City Philadelphia knows, the town's parking authority is notoriously efficient at issuing tickets. But one unlucky driver discovered earlier today that the ticket isn't always the biggest dick move....

How Creepy Chinese Automakers Use Sexy Naked Women To Sell Unsexy Cars
Sex appeal is used to sell cars in every country, but China has outdone the rest of the world with what they call "breast milk exhibitions," i.e. regular auto shows filled with topless and sometimes totally naked women....

Here Is A Gif Of Wade Boggs Attempting To Dance At Last Night's Oklahoma City Thunder Game
We're not sure why Wade Boggs decided to drop by last night's Spurs-Thunder game, but we're glad he did. In the fourth quarter, just before a Russell Westbrook free throw, the Fox Sports Oklahoma cameras found the baseball Hall of Famer in the stands—after which he boogied a bit in his seat....

Arsenal's Jack Wilshere Took A Studs-Up Boot To The Crotch Yesterday
Gunners star Jack Wilshere entered a world of pain yesterday in the first half of Arsenal's match at Reading, when Royals midfielder Jobi McAnuff delivered a boot square to Wilshere's balls....

Sidney Crosby Played Goalie In A Dek Hockey Game The Other Night
Had there been no NHL lockout, the Pittsburgh Pensguins would have had a travel day Friday after a road game in Boston on Thursday and another one in Winnipeg on Saturday. As it was, Sidney Crosby had some time to kill, and since Justin Bieber had already swagged his way through Pittsburgh, Crosby q...