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Cincy's Octavius Ellis Ejected For Forearm Shiver, Cries As He Leaves
Cincinnati is locked in a tight battle with Purdue for the right to play (presumably) Kentucky in the next round, but their task just got a lot harder after forward Octavius Ellis was given a flagrant two and ejected for the forearm shiver above. He seemed to regret his excessively violent boxing ou...

Serie A Side Parma, $106 Million In Debt, Declared Bankrupt
Serie A side Parma, who are dead last and a sure thing to be relegated, was declared bankrupt in Italian court today, according to The Guardian. While it looks like they will finish out the Serie A season—possibly with funding from the league or Italian soccer federation—there remains the possibilit...

Ohio State's D'Angelo Russell Bloodied By Elbow To The Face
Ohio State's D'Angelo Russell took an elbow to the face courtesy of VCU's Doug Brooks while going up for a rebound. Brooks got hit with a flagrant one foul; Russell needed to be cleaned up, but kept playing after the injury....

Deadspin Up All Night: Let The Flutes Go
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Pace yourselves....

SMU Just Got Boned Out Of The Tournament By A Bullshit Goaltending Call
SMU just lost a heartbreaker to UCLA, and holy shit, are they going to have a hard time swallowing this one....

If You Have A Heart, Pull For SMU
You can say a lot of things about Southern Methodist University: lots of spoiled kids go there, it has the George W. Bush library and is proud of it, that whole death penalty thing, etc. etc. and then some. But for me, it is of some great personal significance that they're even playing in the NCAA t...

Georgia State's R.J. Hunter Topples Baylor, Dad With Deep Three
Georgia State's R.J. Hunter sank a deep, deep three to upset third-seeded Baylor and get the 57-56 victory. Panthers coach (and R.J.'s father) Ron Hunter, who tore his Achilles celebrating his team's Sun Belt championship, fell out of his rolling chair after his son hit the shot....

The Life Of An Everton Fan
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The USMNT Should Boycott The 2022 World Cup
Today FIFA announced that they are formally moving ahead with plans to host the 2022 World Cup in Qatar in November and December of that year, with the final being played a week before Christmas. As you may already know, Qatar's World Cup infrastructure is being built using Moses-era slavery practi...

"Make Hummus, Not Walls": A Food Tour Of Ramallah
It was somewhere around the first bite of m'sakhan and the second glass of arak that I started to think that my panic had been unfounded. "Unfounded" is a strong word. Misdirected, perhaps. But I'm getting ahead of myself. ...

Tim Howard Kinda Just Chills With His Hands Down, Watches Goal Go In
I know. I know. It was a great goal from Dynamo Kiev's Andriy Yarmolenko. Someone should've, could've stepped to the ball, at some point. Tim Howard probably couldn't have gotten to it anyway. I know. That's all out of the way....

Iowa State Blows It; UAB Wins By A Point
Fred Hoiberg's squad didn't get a second game to show off their style of play. Third-seeded Iowa State lost to UAB 60-59 after Naz Long's potential tying three missed, and the ball went in as a two-point shot with less than a second remaining. This was the Blazers' first tournament win since the...

Lionel Messi And Cristiano Ronaldo Find Their Final Forms
For a depressingly large group of actuarial soccer fans, this season's thrilling edition of the duel between temporally and cosmically entwined superstars Cristiano Ronaldo and Lionel Messi has mainly served as another set of cudgels to club down the other's reputation and legacy. Go deeper, becau...

Demetrius Jackson Leads Notre Dame On A Razzle-Dazzle Fast Break
14-seed Northeastern brought the fight to Notre Dame today, but eventually lost 69-65 after crapping away a chance to tie it up in the closing seconds. Before that, though, Notre Dame guard Demetrius Jackson pulled off this slick bit of dribbling and passing on a fast break. So far, this is the high...

Red Stripe: Rightfully Beloved In Kingston And Cambridge Alike
If you live in the Northeastern United States, you need to move, because tomorrow's the first day of spring, and it's going to snow. Believe me, I'm just as tired of whining about the weather as you are of listening to me whine about the weather, but it's been so relentlessly abominable that I can...

Life Ain't Easy For A Basketball Player Named Fuck
That up there is a real headline, in a real newspaper, on a real story about a real basketball player named Guilherme Crabogiale Fuck....

Failure To Pay Office Pool Winnings Leads To Sad, Overwrought Email
This overwrought email, sent by the winner of a March Madness office pool to the irresponsible pool administrator who was dragging his or her feet with payouts, comes to us from a tipster who tells us that he dusts it off every March for a good chuckle. We don't blame him....

How to Cash Out Your Change
It's around 3 p.m., and I'm starting to run out of gas. My brain just has no juice. I'm a writer, and I work best in the mornings, so I try to be typing by 7:45 a.m., and with any luck I make it till 4 before the gears start to grind and the works gum up. But not today. Today, by like 3:15, the wo...

If You Like Overrated Teams That Will Let You Down, Root For Georgetown
Listen. My dad grew up in DC. My mom went to Georgetown, and was an extra in The Exorcist. College Allen Iverson is, in my opinion, the greatest basketball player of all time. I grew up playing ball with Austin Freeman. One of my best friends went to Georgetown, and another one is an assistant coach...