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Dallas Stars captain Jamie Benn does everything you’re not supposed to
Other than the New York Yankees for some reason, no sport really gives a flying fuck about having a captain. The NFL will occasionally pay lip service to it, but then coaches pass around that designation like a joint to reward whoever went longest at practice without drinking water or whatever. I as...
What does the NHL have to gain by readmitting Joel Quenneville to the league?
It wasn’t hard to imagine the NHL getting back to this point. There are a couple teams in big markets — i.e. New York and Toronto — that have fallen under the dreaded canopy of “need to learn how to win in the playoffs.” There’s a feeling out there that these teams’ stars lack some sort of killer in...
Latest NHL marathon game should’ve barely lasted past regulation
You know that NHL playoff game that ended right before 2 a.m. Eastern? The one where Carolina and Florida still looked composed after nearly 140 minutes on the Raleigh ice and a Matthew Tkachuk goal with 12.7 seconds left in the fourth overtime, saving those brave souls who didn’t pass out from more...
The Toronto Maple Leafs are about to do something stupid
The rest of the employees of the Springfield Power Plant gathering around the control center of Sector 7-G, with Lenny narrating for everyone the normal practice, “Get ready everyone, he’s about to do something stupid…” is what the NHL is now, gathering around The Six and wondering just what the Tor...
The Toronto Maple Leafs disappoint their fans by winning
No one does a post-mortem like the Toronto Maple Leafs. For the past six years, it’s been an April tradition. The Leafs spit up all over themselves in the playoffs, and then the next week the rest of the playoffs are drowned out by the wailing from southern Ontario about who needs to be traded, who ...
Gabriel ThreeYaksAndADog will miss all of next season, and the Colorado Avalanche era may already be over
In the salary-capped NHL, you get one, or two shots with one roster, and then you basically have to reshuffle everything around your core stars, and hope that new hand still produces a flush. It’s a constant game of draw poker. ...
Mat Ishbia can still flop like the college scrub that he is
How do you know that Phoenix Suns owner Mat Ishbia made being a go-hard his entire lifestyle?...
It’s not supposed to be that easy, Connor
The NHL playoffs like to revel in its celebration of depth and the unsung. Everyone gets a shift, so everyone had better do a job or more, and the puck can bounce onto anyone’s stick or off anyone’s ass to change a game, a series, a whole spring. It is not always a stage for the leading men to provi...
Playoff hockey is stupid anyway
The NHL Playoffs gets its jollies from defying logic or explanation, and reveling in its unpredictability. That doesn’t mean it’s always a free-for-all, as hockey and its fans would have you believe. But it delves into the chaos and silliness more often than its brethren, that’s for sure....
The Devils go old school
Hockey looking back on its history is not usually a good thing. The game is better now, it’s faster now, there is more skill than ever before, and the sport is better off now that it’s moved out of its bar brawl past, even if Flyers fans still base their entire existence on thinking that’s how the g...