ick Page 558 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
![A Couple Of Beer-Swilling Guys With Beards Sat On The Mavericks' Bench Tonight In Detroit [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
A Couple Of Beer-Swilling Guys With Beards Sat On The Mavericks' Bench Tonight In Detroit [UPDATE]
At first glance, it looks like these two jokers kicking back with beers simply had seats at the end of the Dallas bench, but it soon becomes obvious they're actually seated between Delonte West and Vince Carter. It's tough to tell whether the best part of this is the video itself—complete with t...

Darth Vader Defeated A Taser But Succumbed To Pepper Spray In Orlando Last Week
From ClickOrlando, and via tipster Joshua K., comes this tale about how "a Florida Highway Patrol trooper was attacked in Orlando early Thursday by a man wearing a Darth Vader mask."...

Barry Larkin Is In The Hall Of Fame
Your roundup of all the hottest hot-stove items of the day (and whatever shit Ken Rosenthal is throwing against the wall). This is ... HOT FUCKING STOVE!...

The Secret Service Says Delonte West Was Never Banned From The White House
When he wasn't playing basketball games this weekend, Delonte West spent his days engaged in leisurely Twitter meltdowns: He complained about his salary and his team, and related it all to the media's portrayal of him since his arrest in 2009. He also singled out one particular writer who he says ne...

Yes, That Is Mark Cuban Wearing A Suit
The Dallas Mavericks (minus Delonte West) are getting the NBA Champions' treatment at the White House today, which for coach Rick Carlisle means a chance to tickle the ivories....

Teamwork Results In One Of The Greatest Cricket Catches You'll Ever See
From New Zealand domestic competition, Central Districts' Bevan Small corrals the ball as he sails over the boundary rope, and flips it back to Michael Mason to save the six. Cricket!...

Penn State's New President Is Being Less Than Candid About What He Knew About Jerry Sandusky
Rodney Erickson was named the interim president of Penn State on Nov. 9, the night Graham Spanier resigned in the wake of the Jerry Sandusky child sex abuse scandal. The school lifted the interim tag from Erickson the following week, formally putting him in charge, and soon after he stated his comm...
![Hakeem Nicks Treated The Falcons To His Own Interpretation Of "The Dirty Bird" [UPDATE: Jamal Anderson Responds]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/18j4ojgb6547ijpg.jpg)
Hakeem Nicks Treated The Falcons To His Own Interpretation Of "The Dirty Bird" [UPDATE: Jamal Anderson Responds]
After splitting coverage and making the Atlanta Falcons defense look absolutely foolish, Giants receiver Hakeem Nicks celebrated his touchdown with his take on the Falcons' Dirty Bird—a dance popularized when Nicks was in the fourth grade. [Fox] ...

Delonte West Had A Twitter Meltdown
Delonte West won't be making the trip with his teammates (he's on the Dallas Mavericks now) to visit President Obama at the White House, as is customary for all championship teams these days. Background checks are now required and West apparently flunked his thanks to weapons charges from 2009. App...

"We Are Taking Control Of The Narrative," Said PSU President In Stupidly Triumphant Sandusky Memo
The AP got its claws on four internal memos circulated among Penn State's board of trustees and the school's new president Rodney Erickson mere days after charges were filed against accused child rapist Jerry Sandusky last November. More face. More egg. The memos are about damage control, money, and...

On Second Thought, I Won't Call A.J. Daulerio A Porny Douchebag
Over the next few days, we'll be roasting our former editor A.J. Daulerio, who has moved across the room to edit Gawker, your destination for Mark Zuckerberg upskirts. If you have an A.J. story to share, or if you would like to participate in some other way, please email [email protected]. Lightly...

Rick DiPietro Gets Injured While On Injured Reserve
The Islanders' $4.5 million third-string goaltender was sent home to see the doctor after he suffered a lower body injury, even though he's already been on IR for a month. [Newsday]...

Your Complete Guide To Which Republican Presidential Candidates Are Like Which Quarterbacks
OK, now Michele Bachmann has backed up her claim at being the Tim Tebow of the 2012 presidential campaign by being nearly shut out in the Iowa Republican caucuses. The results are in; here's how the rest of the field shapes up:...
![Mavericks Play-By-Play Voice Mark Followill Will Not Tolerate Your Online Criticism [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/18j4opz3qbkx6jpg.jpg)
Mavericks Play-By-Play Voice Mark Followill Will Not Tolerate Your Online Criticism [UPDATE]
NBA X's & O's maven Sebastian Pruiti (formerly of NBA Playbook, now at Grantland) watches a lot of basketball on television—as much, I'd wager, as anyone in the country. An experienced observer of local NBA broadcasts, then, he's within his rights to offer the tame criticism of the Mavericks broadc...

Yep, It Looks Like A Wisconsin Assistant Coach Ate A Booger At The Rose Bowl
We think this is Wisconsin assistant coach Joe Rudolph pulling a Spaulding in the first quarter of the Rose Bowl; here it is in full forensic-quality slow-mo and zoomed-in just for your enjoyment. [ESPN]...

Here's Another One Of Those 105-Yard Kickoff Returns We Were Told We'd Never See Again
When the NFL moved kickoffs up prior to the start of the season, long returns were nearly declared extinct. While the number of return TDs is down significantly, there have been a good number of surprises, like this one from San Diego's Richard Goodman. [CBS]...

David Akers Is Now Throwing Touchdown Passes
We're not sure if this says more for Jim Harbaugh's shrewdness or the Rams' general ineptitude, but this fake field goal completion from David Akers to Michael Crabtree was a pass even Tim Tebow would have completed. That having been said, the fake was so good it even fooled the broadcast truck. [...

Drew Bledsoe Is A Big Fan Of <i>Caddyshack</i>, Filming Televised Nose Pickers With His Camera Phone
Although we have better resources for providing high quality video from sporting even broadcasts, we figured we'd share this with you. That's because the Zapruder to this head shot was (apparently) Drew Bledsoe....

Illinois Ball Boy Later Flagged For Unsportsmanlike Conduct While Attempting To Pick His Friend's Nose At Fight Hunger Bowl
Your morning roundup for Jan. 1, the day we whimsically shook our heads and thought "they've done it again." Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....

Let's Celebrate The New Year With Auburn's Statue Of Liberty Play
There's never a bad time for a trick play, and Auburn tied up the Chick-Fil-A Bowl in Atlanta with a picture-perfect Statue of Liberty. Happy New Year in the United States of Football. [ESPN]...