il Page 1393 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Let's Watch Cowboys In Police Cars Try To Lasso An Escaped Bull
"We've had wildlife in the city before, but I don't remember a bull being downtown and you're right ... we were concerned for the bull and for citizens' safety." — Mike Hirman, Auburn (WA) Police Department [WJBF]...
The Philadelphia Union's Cryptic "New Player Announcement" Means Freddy Adu Is MLS-Bound
According to a press release sent out by the Philadelphia Union around 3:30 p.m., the team "will introduce their newest team member" at noon. Their CEO, manager and "new team member" will all be available for comment....
Dead Comedian Of The Week: Vaughn Meader, Assassination Victim
For Comedy Week, we're running a handful of tributes in the vein of our Dead Wrestler of the Week series. Here, Alexander Woo, a writer and co-executive producer for HBO's True Blood, eulogizes Vaughn Meader, the wildly popular JFK impersonator whose star plummeted after the assassination of his sub...
Brewers Pitcher Fiddles With Scissors, Loses
"Narveson was fiddling with his glove with a pair of scissors when the scissors somehow slipped and sliced his left thumb. That would be the thumb on his pitching hand. Eight stitches were needed to close the wound, Brewers manager Ron Roenicke said." [Sporting News]...
Cubs Fan Catches Foul Ball, Does Not Drop Baby
It's that time of year again, when dads somehow simultaneously shirk and embrace parental responsibility by catching foul balls with babes in arms. Last night in Chicago, a Cubs fan managed to juggle his infant to his left arm and grab a foul ball with his right....
More Foul Ball Benevolence In The NL West
This is in the same vein as the Diamondbacks kid warming all our hearts, but with a twist. On first glance, the boy in the Giants jersey catches a foul ball in the glove, then hands it over to the guy in front of him. But apparently the fellow in red had caught a ball earlier in the game and given...
Calgary's List Of Most Wanted Fugitives Includes Mr. Dakota Neil Weasel Head
This man is on the loose for failure to comply. This man, according to the Vancouver Sun, is Dakota Neil Weasel Head. He's made Calgary Crime Stoppers' list of the city's top 13 fugitives. (No word on whether Jay Feaster made the list, too)....
Wanted: Boston-Area Roommate For High-Strung Veteran Wide Receiver Who Tweets A Lot
Chad Ochocinco, most recently in love with his quarterback: young, fetching Thomas Brady, needs a roommate in Boston. He wants a big Patriots fan, perhaps a real-life Tommy from Quinzee:...
Another Golfer Says Steve Williams Violated The Caddie Code
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Paul Azinger knows golf has unwritten rules too....
Get To Know A Comic You Probably Don't Know: Kumail Nanjiani
I moved to America from Pakistan at 18 to attend Grinnell College in Iowa. Came out of Chicago with a bunch of other talented comedians—Hannibal Buress, Jared Logan, and Brooke Van Poppelen. My jokes are usually observational: a lot of them have to do with pop culture, and they always end with a q...
Chris Johnson's Holdout Is Good News For Titans Fans; Eagles Fans Should Probably Worry About DeSean Jackson
Happy August 9th! It's a day you should have circled on your football calendar, because today's the day that players have to report to camp in order to accrue a year of service. As dictated by the new CBA, any players still holding out for reworked contracts will have to wait an extra year for their...
Shaq's New Girlfriend Is Admirably Comically Sized (UPDATE: This Is How They Kiss)
Maybe she could fit inside one of his long jean short legs?...
Grabby Arena Football Fan Draws A Flag
Arena football is different. It's the kind of sport where a fan reaches out of the seats to bodily prevent an opposing player from returning a kickoff. And more tellingly, it's the kind of sport where the home team's players then go over to congratulate the fan for interfering with play....
Some Rockets Are Just More Impressive Than Others
Your morning roundup for Aug. 9, the day we decided not to bid on the Marilyn Monroe sex tape. H/T to Gordon for the photo. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
Yup, This Is Bill Simmons' Mustache
Simmons debuted the above fuzz while guest hosting Pardon the Interruption today....
Tim Tebow's Backwards Baseball Cap Is Serious Business
Broncos fans, you are amazing. Amazing....
Sarah Silverman Helps Kick Off Deadspin's Second Attempt At Comedy Week
Some of you may notice how we've attempted to initiate some theme weeks into our editorial content this past year, including topics that have little or no connection to sports whatsoever. Last April's Comedy Week was our first trip into this uncharted territory, done in conjunction with our former f...
A Case Study In Why You Shouldn't Share An Email Address With Your Lovely Wife
Tipster Matthew D. recently shared details of what happened when a guy named Christian dropped out of their fantasy football league. All participants are from the PA/NJ/NY area but for Christian, who's from Seattle. "Only one of us has had the privilege of meeting him in person," Matthew pointed ou...
Radio Guy Apologizes For Calling Giants Pitcher An "Illegal Alien"
When the Phillies and Giants sorta-brawled last night, radio guy Tony Bruno (on right in photo) sent out this Tweet: "gutless #!@%*! Giants. Bochy is a coward for having his illegal alien pitcher hit a guy since mighty Frisco boys ..." and quickly deleted it. But nothing's quickly deleted. ...
The Phillies And Giants Engaged In One Of Those Brawls That Really Aren't Brawls But Look Good On TV Anyway
Your morning roundup for Aug. 6, the day our Chinese overlords recommended we seek treatment for our mooching-trillions addiction. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....