il Page 1524 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Pray For The Arena Football League
Bon Jovi and his fellow owners are working to keep the AFL afloat, even phone chatting at 7 p.m. each night, but he said chances of survival are "50-50." Also, the CFL kicks off tonight. Happy Canada Day! [Fifth Down]...
Soderbergh's <i>Moneyball</i> Script Too Real To Get Made
The Sony Pictures executive who pulled the plug on Moneyball says that Steven Soderbergh changed the original script because he didn't want anything in the movie that didn't actually happen. So Billy Beane isn't a sweaty, foul-mouthed, Hooters waitress slayer?...
Henry Family Reminds Everyone Who's The Boss
Carl Henry was not happy about that article that seemed to suggest he was a arrogant basketball father on a power trip, so he responded in the only way that made sense—by pulling an arrogant power trip....
Khalil Greene Not Over Anxiety Problems
Greene—0 for his last 16 AB—is back on the DL with his "social anxiety disorder." Maybe he just needs time to grow a better mullet. [MLB.com]...
Coach K Defies The Reckless Rumormongering
Despite the claims of a Racine Journal Times reporter's well-placed source, Mike Krzyzewski said he won't be Phil Jackson's "heir apparent." But if Kobe wants to come be Duke's third scholarship guard — well, that might be acceptable. [ACC Now]...
Bullrider, 12, Trampled And Killed; Everyone Shrugs And Says It Was "Nobody's Fault"
A 12-year-old Colorado bullrider was killed Sunday when he was thrown from his mount and trampled, rupturing his heart's left ventricle. That's awful enough. Then everyone sprinted through all five stages of grief and headed straight for damage control....
Darren Daulton Wants To Makes It Clear That He Has Done A Lot Drugs
Everyone knows Darren Daulton was not a saint and he maybe indulged in some personal excess during his 14 major league seasons, but he just wants assure everyone of the real truth—the man was absolutely full of drugs....
Henry Boys Not Making A Lot Of Friends At Kansas
This story about hoop brothers Xavier and C.J. Henry—and their mastermind father, Carl—is pretty much everything you need to understand about the modern world of college basketball. Try not to let that fact stop you from reading it....
Don't Like Your Starting Pitcher? Sell Him On eBay
His value is estimated at $100,000, so for $.01 on a joke eBay auction, Suppan is a steal. Disclaimer: "No Harms was made to Brewers, Fans, Suppan, Hall and any other animal while making and publishing this add." [HRDerby]...
Billy Mays' Death Is A Golden Marketing Opportunity
Billy Mays was the ultimate pitchman, so what better way to honor his memory than with a poorly conceived, possibly tasteless press release tangentially related to his infomercial lifestyle? Someone get Tony Mandarich on the phone....
Help William & Mary Find A New Mascot
William & Mary is as old school as old school gets, so naturally their sports teams are little traditional/racist. They need a new mascot and it's up to you to prevent (or ensure) that they become the Fightin' Asparagus....
Brandon Jennings Continues To Offend, Well, Everyone
Any day now, the NBA will teach Brandon Jennings to be studiedly bland and tactful. Until then, let's enjoy the glorious insolence of a 19-year-old rookie who says what we've all thought at one time or another: "Fuck the Knicks."...
Mobster Doesn't Take Kindly To Soccer Players Who Insult His Girlfriend
It must have stung Bulgarian goaltender Nikolay Mihailov when his Playmate model girlfriend dumped him for a notorious mob boss—but it probably stings even more when the mob boss decides to attack you with acid....
At Wimbledon, Court 2 Means You're Ugly
Interesting story from London's Daily Mail where they get an All England Club spokesman to admit the ladies featured on the hallowed Centre Court aren't necessarily the best players, but they are the best-looking players....
Ozzie Guillen Not Helping North-South Side Relations
It's time for another round of every Chicago baseball fan's favorite game, "Guess The Deleted Expletive In Ozzie Guillen's Anti-Cubs Rant." Or for bonus fun, just make up a word and get an even better quote....
So We All Still Love Soccer Now, Right?
Does anyone know when the next USA soccer game is? Because unless it's this Wednesday*, I'm guessing our nation may have trouble parlaying the magical Confederations Cup showing into a nationwide love affair with the sport....
Shaq: Best Big Man Ever, Or Perpetual Second Banana?
We are about to enter the first week in a world in which Shaquille O'Neal is a Cavalier. Diesel's last stop or not, it's worth speculating what his legacy will be. It's not so cut and dried....
In Which Kobe Shows The Mayor Who's Boss
Kobe Bryant thinks he's bigger than the mayor of Los Angeles. And you know what? He's right. Divas don't share the spotlight with anyone....
Billy Mays Dead At 50
"Billy Mays here!" Not anymore. Chad Ochocinco was wrong. This is worse than 9/11. Now let's all watch his ESPN360 commercials and weep gently. [TBO]...
How The U.S. Can Wipe The Floor With Brazil
Bob Bradley must be slightly busy right now trying to prepare his team to pull off another upset of a superior squad. Toilet-papering one of Brazil's finest is probably a strategy he hasn't considered....