il Page 835 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Tennis Player's Meltdown Ends With Smashed Racket And "Broken" Banana
One tennis player’s violent racket-smashing meltdown at Sunday’s ATP Challenger final in Busan, Korea had devastating consequences for a banana....
Fox News Dedicates Entire Segment To Spewing Bullshit About Jemele Hill Being "Unemployed"
The U.S. president’s favorite television show Fox & Friends spent an entire segment this morning blasting Jemele Hill, stating the ESPN writer and commentator lost her job at the network due to her criticism of Donald Trump. One problem: Jemele Hill remains fully, gainfully employed by the Worldwide...
Milwaukee's Mayor And Cops Are Already Apologetic About The Forthcoming Sterling Brown Arrest Video
The video footage of Bucks guard Sterling Brown’s arrest is set to be released this week, and judging by how Milwaukee authorities are scrambling to do damage control, it sure seems like it’ll tell a very different story from the one police first told. Brown was arrested on Jan. 26 for resisting arr...
Odubel Herrera’s On-Base Streak Ended Even Though He Got On Base
Odubel Herrera didn’t start opening day, but since then, he’s been on fire: He leads the National League in batting average, at .344, and is 10th in slugging. (Yes, genius manager/fedora wearer Gabe Kapler benched his best player, now a legit NL MVP candidate, for the first game of the season.) The ...
The Deadspin Idiots Try To Build A Chair Faster Than A Chair-Building Robot
I’m concerned that it looks like I’m faking incompetence in this video in order to live down to my pre-build expectations for myself. The people with which I have shared apartments and furniture in the past can tell you that I am not faking it. I can tell you that I only wish that was the case. Thes...
Cowboys Receiver Terrance Williams Arrested After Crashing Lamborghini
Cowboys wide receiver Terrance Williams was reportedly arrested Saturday morning and charged with public intoxication following a crash involving his Lamborghini, according to ESPN:...
Shortstop Pedro Florimon Pitches Perfect Inning, Then Socks Mighty Dinger
The dreaded Cardinals chased Phillies ace Jake Arrieta after just three innings in Friday night’s gloomy, rain-delayed tilt in St. Louis. The score was then 4-0; by the time reliever Drew Hutchison finished the sixth inning it was 9-2; the game finally became a laugher when Yacksel Rios allowed anot...
Tom Jurich Gets $7.2 Million, Lifetime Tickets In Louisville Settlement
If there’s one benefit to working in a leadership position at a major college sports program, and there are many, it’s that even if you end up disgraced and fired, you’re probably going to stay rich as hell....
D-III Closer Gets Final Three Outs After Puking On The Infield
Rhodes College beat Franklin College 4-2 on the opening day of D-III regionals today, but it wasn’t without a ninth inning pitching performance that gave new meaning to the phrase “gutting it out.”...
Alex Honnold Wants To Save Our National Parks<em></em>
Naturally, Alex Honnold is in Yosemite right now. This should not surprise you, because if non-climbers know anything about Honnold, it’s that he climbed El Capitan without a rope a year ago, becoming the first person to free solo the legendary big wall. When I spoke to him yesterday, Honnold was en...
Bill Bradley Had Some Dumb Thoughts About The Legalization Of Sports Gambling
Sports gambling is going to be a disaster for some. The widespread legalization of sports gambling in the United States, for which the Supreme Court paved the way with a ruling earlier this week, will lead to some people gambling all their money away. It will not lead to a renaissance in Atlantic Ci...
Announcers Go Nuts As AB de Villiers Jacks Huge Dinger Right Out Of The Stadium<em></em>
There is a cricket ball bouncing down the streets of Bangalore right now after legendary batsman AB de Villiers cranked an enormous dong entirely out of M. Chinnaswamy Stadium....
Report: Very Fortunate Mike Budenholzer Gets To Coach Giannis Now<em></em>
Mike Budenholzer, the head coach who parted ways with the Atlanta Hawks last month after a 24-58 season, has agreed to become the new coach of the Milwaukee Bucks, according to Woj. What a lucky bastard....
It Sure Seems Like Nobody Running Any Sports Team Knows How To Run A Basic Background Check
The Luke Heimlich redemption tour carried on this week, cresting with the full Sports Illustrated feature treatment. There are thousands of words, a serious-faced cover photo, an alliterative headline, randomly capitalized words (“the era of Too Much Information” comes up twice), and all the fancy o...
Maybe, Just Maybe, The Knicks Might Have A Functional Defense
The Knicks did not luck out, which is basically an evergreen sentence. Their lottery pick did not leap into the top three, which had only a six percent chance of occurring last night. It instead landed at nine, as expected. I feel a little good about this. ...
Please Just Call Up Vladimir Guerrero Jr., He's Too Good For The Minor Leagues
Truly I say to you today: Double-A ball offers no challenge to Vladimir Guerrero Jr. besides that of a blank canvas upon which he can paint wild highlights. The 19-year-old slugger has spent his time with the New Hampshire Fisher Cats smacking big dingers and generally looking like he belongs at a h...
The MLB Narcs Have Come For Willson Contreras And His Venezuela Sleeve
Cubs catcher Willson Contreras began wearing a Venezuelan-flag sleeve to honor his home country last summer, and it has become an essential component of his uniform. But as part of MLB’s recent efforts to crack down on uniform regulations, Contreras has been told by the league that he can no longer ...
The Penultimate Episode Of The All-Athlete <i>Dancing With The Stars </i>Featured A Lot Of Hats And Not Many Shirts
In the 1994 comedy The Mask, a shy bank clerk named Stanley Ipkiss (played by Jim Carrey) is plagued with the burden and the blessing of discovering an ancient mask containing the spirit of the ancient Norse god, Loki. Under the spell of the mask, Ipkiss, an otherwise meek man who has trouble with w...
Jameson Taillon Is Willing To Have His Teammates Pee On Him If It Helps
Pirates pitcher Jameson Taillon was pulled from his start against the Giants on Friday after three excellent innings because of a serious cut on his middle finger, which was likely the result of his thumbnail digging into his finger when he threw curveballs. Taillon was bleeding on the ball to point...
Jorge Linares Beat Vasiliy Lomachenko, Right Up Until He Didn't
Jorge Linares is a flashy, creative athletic freak who has, over a period of many years and much pain, been pushed into the mold of a textbook boxer, like a wild, raging river channeled into an orderly canal. Thus he possesses both the physical gifts of the freak and the carefulness of the technicia...