il Page 848 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Shaq: Put Cops Around And Inside Everything<em></em>
Someone asked Shaq, an occasional cop, what to do about school shootings. His take? Just build the school out of cops. Sure! ...
<i>Sports Illustrated </i>Writer: The Vikings Took My Advice And Signed Kirk Cousins
Here is Sports Illustrated writer and tape-eater extraordinaire Andy Benoit crafting a lead that is the columnist’s version of inviting you into his office just as he finishes off a set of 500 pushups:...
World Rejoices As Shitty Manchester United Team Knocked Out Of Champions League
Yesterday’s Manchester United-Sevilla Champions League match was the best game of the knockout rounds thus far. Not because these are two particularly great teams competing—they both are pretty bad—nor because they played especially well—the game was largely awful. No, this match was great for prett...
BLAH LBAH LBAH
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I Can't Stop Watching This Perfect Stealth Pickoff
Unless you have a strong love of beefy minor-league catchers and/or guys who spent six years in the Phillies’ farm system without making it to Double-A, there’s no good reason for you to have heard of Willians Astudillo. Or, at least, there wasn’t until yesterday—when he pulled off this beautifully ...
The Predators Are Hustling And It's Wonderful To Watch
This is one of my favorite sequences from the NHL season so far....
John Calipari Is So Close
Kentucky head coach John Calipari had his annual behind-the-scenes profile published today, this time in GQ; this one follows Calipari around his family’s beach house and his church, and the coach even let reporter Reid Forgrave attend mass with him. This somehow led to Calipari being referred to as...
Joe Theismann On The Skins Re-Signing Kirk Cousins: "It Would've Been A Big Nut To Swallow"
Quarterback Kirk Cousins and the Skins had been at a contract impasse for quite some time, but that ended today with Cousins signing with the Vikings for a reported three years and $84 million. Former Washington QB Joe Theismann went on D.C. sports radio to discuss why the team let Cousins walk, and...
Markelle Fultz Shooting Form Update: Shot Smoother<em></em>
Last time we checked in on the status of No. 1 overall draft pick Markelle Fultz’s shot, he had discovered the magic of the three-pointer. Today, Fultz shot some free throws, an exercise which revealed an alarming hitch two months ago. Let’s see how much he’s improved....
Judge Overseeing College Basketball Corruption Case Would Like Everyone To Stop The Dang Leaks
U.S. District Judge Edgardo Ramos has officially had it with the leaks coming out of the FBI’s ongoing pay-for-play case against various college basketball programs....
Blake Bortles Says He's No Longer A Beach Bar Bro, But Remains A Big Fan Of Beer
It’s a known but unverified rumor that Jaguars quarterback Blake Bortles likes to partake in Jacksonville’s nightlife, specifically beach bars. (Specifically an establishment called Lemon Bar.) But in a recent interview, the QB says that’s no longer the case and hasn’t been for a couple of years. He...
As Always, God Bless Evan Turner, Who Has Invited The Haters To Kiss His Ass
Blazers guard Evan Turner, who has always believed in himself to a somewhat alarming degree, recently spoke to NBC Sports about naysayers who believe that he’s overpaid and underproducing. Turner has one message for those haters:...
Venus Williams Beats Serena 6-3, 6-4 At Indian Wells
The first tournament run of Serena Williams’s comeback ended at the hands of a familiar opponent—her sister, Venus Williams, who defeated her 6-3, 6-4 tonight in the third round at Indian Wells. ...
Brandon Jennings Brought A Near-Triple-Double For The First Game Of His 10-Day Contract
Brandon Jennings started his 2017-18 season in China; this winter, he moved on to the D-League; one of his sharpest performances of the year, across all those leagues and locales, came tonight—in his first game of a 10-day NBA contract, back with the team that drafted him. ...
Report: Louisville Players Voted Not To Play In NIT, But They're Going Anyway
The Louisville Cardinals kick off their NIT run Tuesday night, but the players might not have any desire to play in college basketball’s less exciting tournament. According to the Courier-Journal, players were “emotionally exhausted” from the program’s tumultuous season which featured an escort scan...
The Arizona Wildcats Are The Fun Kind Of NCAA Bad Guys
Seen through a certain college basketball purist’s eyes, Arizona are the unquestionable villains of this year’s NCAA Tournament. With other alleged Sanctity Of Amateurism offenders like Louisville and USC out of the picture, the Wildcats are the most prominent tournament team that currently stands a...
Jake Arrieta Finally Rejoins The Ranks Of The Employed, Signs With The Phillies
Jake Arrieta, National League Cy Young Award winner, World Series hero, thrower of two career no-hitters, recently the ace of the Chicago Cubs rotation, is reportedly set to join the Philadelphia Phillies, a team that won 66 games in 2017:...
Whose On First
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The Fraudsters At Jimmy Haslam's Pilot Flying J Had Some Very Racist Takes On The Browns And Raiders
A U.S. District Court Judge has unsealed transcripts of secretly recorded tapes gathered in the investigation of fraud perpetrated by Browns owner Jimmy Haslam’s Pilot Flying J company. While the transcripts apparently don’t contradict Haslam’s claim that he was in no way involved in the scheme, the...