il Page 865 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Even An Official Didn't Know Why Kelvin Benjamin's Touchdown Was Overturned
The NFL’s stupid, byzantine rule book got in the way of our ability to enjoy the sport again last weekend. This time, Bills receiver Kelvin Benjamin had a sensational touchdown catch against the Patriots taken away by a replay cop stationed back at headquarters in New York, and even one of the offic...
Why Does Jon Gruden Think The Philadelphia Stadiums Are "Downtown"?
Philadelphia teams have been tanking incompetently since before Sam Hinkie was alive. The 1968 Eagles started out 0-11 and looked like a lock to draft O.J. Simpson No. 1 overall. Then they won two straight to ensure that the Bills would have the top pick. In their 14th and final game that year, a yo...
<i>It's A Wonderful Life</i> Characters, Ranked
1. Mary Bailey...
Travaris Cadet Suffered A Horrifying Leg Injury
Travaris Cadet took a swing pass from Tyrod Taylor in the second quarter of today’s Bills-Patriots game, and was quickly wrapped up in the backfield. He also suffered a horrifying leg injury: Trey Flowers tackled him, and wrapped Cadet’s upper body around while Cadet’s lower body was still under Flo...
The Upstart Sixers Are Having A Bad Time
The Sixers were a trendy pick to make a run at the top half of the Eastern Conference playoff field this season, to such a degree that Sixers fans and Sam Hinkie loyalists were doing preseason touchdown dances about signs of arrival as abstract as the drafting of Markelle Fultz and the extension of ...
Tom Brady Gets Snappy When Asked About His Sketchy Guru's Rift With Bill Belichick
The Boston Globe recently revealed that Tom Brady’s extremely sketchy personal fitness guru Alex Guerrero was banned from the Patriots’ planes and sidelines. Guerrero, a modern snake oil salesman, seems to have irritated head coach Bill Belichick, which has naturally led to speculation about how Br...
XFL Plans Get More Concrete As Vince McMahon Tries To Prove Himself Again
The improbable unto implausible XFL revival story somehow continued to take shape on Thursday. After a week of conspicuously zero coverage from his network, ESPN’s Darren Rovell published an article on the prospective league that included a few new details. The new information was broken into two pa...
Bless This Oafish Koch Heir And His Hideous Shirts
Because it is so cruel and so stupid, so petty and also so astonishingly vast, it is difficult to fully get a handle on the $1.5 trillion tax bill that the Republicans pushed through the House and Senate on Wednesday. A disconcerting number of little fees and insults in the bill are only now becomin...
Mets Owner Wishes The Yankees Wouldn't Spend So Much Money
The Yankees are up to their old tricks, putting together a championship-caliber club with a combination of a stocked prospect pool and deep, deep pockets. Thanks to the former, they’re reportedly on the verge of trading for starter Gerritt Cole, and thanks to the latter, Giancarlo Stanton is now in ...
Kentavious Caldwell-Pope Is Playing For The Lakers While Serving Jail Time
Back in June, while he was still a Piston, Lakers guard Kentavious Caldwell-Pope was sentenced to 12 months probation by a Michigan judge when he pleaded guilty to a misdemeanor of allowing a person to operate his vehicle under the influence. He reportedly violated that probation over the summer for...
Seahawks Become First-Ever Team Fined For Violating Concussion Protocol
The NFL and NFLPA announced today in a joint statement that the Seattle Seahawks will be fined $100,000 for failing to properly apply the league’s concussion protocol after a hit on QB Russell Wilson in a Seahawks-Cardinals game on Nov. 9. This fine marks the first time that an NFL team has been dis...
All Of A Sudden, Blake Bortles Is Good Enough
Even as the Jaguars started winning this season, there remained a comfort in being able to continue to clown on Blake Bortles for being Blake Bortles. But not lately. The Jags are in the playoffs for the first time since the Fred Taylor era, and they mathematically still have a chance to earn home-f...
Report: Carmelo Anthony Used To Snooze Through Phil Jackson's Mindfulness Routines
Over at ESPN, Ian Begley has chronicled the festering relationship between former Knicks boss and unbearable weed pedant Phil Jackson and former Knicks star Carmelo Anthony. It’s a long string of satisfying anecdotes but my favorite one captures the purest essence of both characters:...
Rescuers Save Driver After Truck Crashes Into Evan Turner's Swimming Pool<em></em>
The driver of a semi truck carrying a dumpster filled with dirt had to be taken to an Oregon hospital with “serious” but non-life threatening injuries after he crashed into the swimming pool of Portland Trail Blazers guard Evan Turner this morning. A team of at least eight rescuers worked to save th...
Report: Curt Schilling's Charity Ditched A Hurricane Harvey Relief Trailer That Didn't Even Belong To Him
Former pitcher and part-time gamer Curt Schilling sprung into action after Hurricane Harvey hit Houston in August. He asked for donations to his charity Operation Bullpen, filled up trailers, and drove to Texas with volunteers. Schilling was briefly hindered in Tennessee, however, when one of the tr...
Big Fucking Shock: The GOP Tax Bill Won't End Stadium Subsidies
For a while there, the Republican tax bill contained a provision that would be difficult to describe as a “silver lining,” given how comprehensively destructive the rest of the bill is, but could reasonably have been described as “not bad.” The provision was set to prevent cities from using tax-exem...
Report: Tom Brady's Quack Doctor Banned From Patriots' Planes And Sidelines
Alex Guerrero has maintained a strange relationship with the Patriots since 2013. He operates the TB12 therapy center next to the Patriots stadium, where he treats players, and his relationship with Brady affords him access to Patriots sidelines and the team plane. However, a day after rumors surfac...
Here's What The Houston Texans Did Instead Of Signing Colin Kaepernick
On Oct. 29, the Houston Texans lost to the Seattle Seahawks, 41-38, a hard-fought game in which rookie QB Deshaun Watson put on an entertaining, four-touchdown, 403-yard performance. Houston was 3-4 but still sat at the edge of the playoff hunt in a weak conference, and Watson had led the offense t...
Are These Assists?
What with all the nice fat triple-doubly Ben Simmons and Lonzo Ball lines, you might be wondering what exactly makes an assist. I am. Not because I’m interested in whether home scorers are especially generous to their local stars—both players, it turns out, average more assists per 36 minutes when o...