ill Page 595 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Bill "Spaceman" Lee, Age 65, Threw A Complete Game Last Night
The high—and I do mean high—priest of baseball eccentrics hasn't pitched in the majors since 1982, but he's still out there, you know, man, and he's still pitching, 65 years young. Last night, the Spaceman took the mound for the San Rafael (Calif.) Pacifics of the independent North American League. ...

Miguel Cairo Fails To Make The Easiest Play Ever
After Juan Pierre led off the Phillies' half of the ninth with a single, it was pretty obvious Kevin Frandsen was going to try to bunt him over to second to put the winning run in scoring position. And once Frandsen got the bunt down and the ball rolled toward Miguel Cairo, it was pretty obvious Cai...

Report: Ball State Players Caught Trying To Shoplift "Male Enhancement Pills"
It has not been a good day for Ball State defensive end Jonathan Newsome, seen here during happier times in 2009, after securing a trip to the Rose Bowl as a member of Ohio State. Newsome transferred to Ball State last year and was ready to join the team after sitting out his redshirt season. Except...

Jon Gruden Is Gonna Get Two Hotel Rooms For All His Bitches, Bill Belichick's Dick Is Hard, And Other Things We Learned From Warren Sapp's New Book
You may know Warren Sapp from his 13 years as an All-Pro NFL defensive tackle, or perhaps from his recent legal foray, the YouTube series "Judge Sapp." Or maybe you watch him on the NFL Network or follow his busy Twitter feed. Well, if you didn't have enough platforms to access Warren Sapp, now you ...

Area Couple Offended By "Loud, Sexualized, Pagan" Olympics
There is nothing in the world like the letters to the editor section of a small newspaper. Remember the Ohio man who wanted the "bisexual" buckeye removed as the state tree? By definition, the people who write these things have too much time on their hands and a capacity for outrage that only kicks ...

"When I Get A Clear Shot...": 25 Years Ago, Dale Earnhardt Received This Death Threat For His Ornery Driving
On May 17, 1987, Dale Earnhardt Sr. and Bill Elliott swapped paint and made a place for themselves in NASCAR lore. The Winston, a newly created all-star race at Charlotte Motor Speedway, came down to a sprint, with Earnhardt and Elliott jockeying for the lead. After bumping and nudging for two laps,...

The Genius Of <em>Enemy Of The State</em>, Tony Scott's Best Film
In the reaction to the sudden death of Tony Scott, a quick consensus emerged: Scott was a more interesting director than he'd been given credit for throughout his career; Top Gun and his general style helped usher in the age of Michael Bay and Olivier Megaton-ism; and the one movie everyone could ag...
![Little Leaguer: ESPN Changed My Player Bio To List My Favorite Show As <em>SportsCenter</em> Instead Of <em>The Dan Patrick Show</em> [UPDATE: It Was A Gag]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/Image_Not_Found_1x_qjofp8.png)
Little Leaguer: ESPN Changed My Player Bio To List My Favorite Show As <em>SportsCenter</em> Instead Of <em>The Dan Patrick Show</em> [UPDATE: It Was A Gag]
Will Lucas from Fairfield, Conn., threw a no-hitter in the Little League World Series yesterday and was invited on the The Dan Patrick Show today to talk about it....

The Hatfield Pig Is Here To Share His Cannibalistic Goodness With Phillies Fans
During your average Phillies broadcast, the freakiest thing you're likely to see is some antic of the Phanatic. Maybe, if you're lucky, a fight will break out in the Citizens Bank Park cheap seats....

Peter King Mentioned The Same Sports Apparel Company 33 Times In Less Than A Month (And Then Apologized For It)
During NFL training camp season, Sports Illustrated senior writer Peter King has trundled from site to site on a bus provided by EvoShield, a "Game-Changing Protective Apparel" company. If EvoShield did this in the hope that King would mention EvoShield a few times, he more than delivered: In all, b...

Chipper Jones Calls Curt Schilling A "Shock Jock"
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Schilling says Jones might come back next year. Jones says Schilling is full of it....

The Houston Astros Tossed A Band-Aid Into A Flowing River Of Blood
Manager Brad Mills was fired last night. No longer shall he be burdened with holding the rudder of the one-player-currently-making-more-than-$750,000-Houston Astros. The team announced the move via email last night, following a particularly Houston Astro-ish loss to the Diamondbacks. Houston also se...

Jay Glazer's NFL Training Camp Survival Kit Included A Steak Knife Under His Pillow
There's a quick question and answer profile on Jay Glazer in the Albany Times-Union that covers most of the usual bases. Terribly boring and soul-crushing jobs at the outset, dogged determination, a secret mixed-martial arts career and eventual success in one's profession....

Is This The Most Terrifying Weather Alert In The History Of Television?
It's midnight. You're snug in your Nashville bed, or maybe on the sofa with your lips wrapped around a crack pipe, I don't know, but whatever excuse you have for watching Jimmy Fallon, that's it....

Your <em>Expendables 2</em> Power Rankings
The Expendables 2 has 11 names on its poster only because there is not room, either in poster space or running time, for 47. It is New Years Eve with testicles. It is the turducken of action movies. Rather than review the film, I thought I'd just rank those 11 names, in ascending order of Expendable...

Philadelphia Lazily Goes Through The Motions Of Complaining That Jimmy Rollins Doesn't Hustle
Sure, the Philadelphia Phillies, with their $173 million payroll, are 10 games under .500 and scrambling to catch the Mets for third place in the division. They have an OPS+ of 89 and only one position player on the active roster who was born after 1983. But they're unafraid to confront the real pro...


Former Columnist And Accused Child Molester Bill Conlin "Enjoying His Retirement" At Undisclosed Location, His Lawyer Says
Bill Conlin's long career as a sports columnist for the Philadelphia Daily News came to a sudden end last December when three women and a man told the Philadelphia Inquirer he had molested them as children. Authorities determined the allegations against him were credible, but that the incidents were...

Woman Who Sat For A While On A Hot Bench Outside Cowboys Stadium Now Suing Jerry Jones
How long were you on this planet before you realized that hot things hurt, and you shouldn't touch them? A few months? A year or two, tops? So when you see a black marble bench, baking in a summer Texas sun on a 101-degree day, maybe you think, hey, it's probably hot, I shouldn't sit there. And even...

The Man Who's Now The Managing Editor Of SI.com Is An Expert On Women's Hair
Sports Illustrated has hired a replacement for SI.com editor Paul Fichtebaum, who was kicked up the chain last month to oversee the integration of the magazine's print and web operations. This morning, the company informed staffers that Matt Bean, the vice president for digital product development...